Yeah, I know. I'm trendy.

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot.
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day Ten: One confession

DAY ONE: Ten things to say to ten different people. Just to clarify right now before anyone has a breakdown, none of the *nasty negative* comments are directed at *anyone* on FA. So no drama. :)

1. Is it possible for you to spend just one day without pestering me? I honestly do not care who you ran into in the Acme, I honestly do not care if Dad woke up at 8 am or 9 am and whether he ate a sandwich or not, and I especially do not care if you decided to put on a sweater at 3pm. Staring at me with your mouth open while you desperately try to think of useless things to say only serves to creep me out, and you really do not EVER need to bust open my door to stare at me agape and then tell me that Dad is wearing a green shirt today but he wore a blue one yesterday. Just STOP it.

2. You really do need to pack the little one and come visit us sometime. It'll be fun.

3. How you have survived in the corporate world as long as you have is a mystery, especially given your track record of failure. The whole system is becoming an incestuous corruption because of you and people who think and act just as you do. Why are you and your kind oblivious to the blindingly obvious truth that *you* are *the* problem with how business works and treats people today? We catch you in lies all the time. You backstab, you play favorites, and bully targets, and people reward you for this? Enjoy the protection from above that you have, while it lasts.

4. I look forward every day to coming home from work and seeing you curled up in my nest and listening to you snore. You are small and fluffy; how can you create such a huge snore?

5. You are a despicable, evil, horrible human being and I hope you die. Soon. I don't know what the voters of NJ thought when they elected you, but it didn't take long for you to puke up your vile hatred on everyone in the state. Did a teacher beat you up as a child? Actually, I hope they did, and I hope you have screaming nightmares every night and wake up in a pool of tears and urine every single day because of it, you sickening bigoted hateful psycho zealot feebleminded pig.

6. I miss you and your sister a lot. You both belong in NJ at Medport, not in the Midwest. :D And I miss all your associated kitties too.

7. I'm not afraid of you, you know. And I'm pretty sure you know that. I'm afraid of me, and what I believe I could do to you. And I think you're a little bit afraid of me too, because you've seen a little of that. And I like that.

8. I think you're pretty awesome, and I think you're selling yourself way short when you choose drinking and toking with the dark side over hanging with the good guys. We'll never do you wrong, and you know it, and it hurts when you choose the other way. You know why they want you around.

9. I worry about you so much sometimes. I don't know what I would do in your situation, but if my mom was as bad as yours, I can't imagine that I could be in the same house anymore for fear of my own safety. You deserve so much better than that.

10. You keep me going, you know. You give me a reason to get out of bed every day and face the Ostrich, when it would be so easy to just shut down. I love you. :)