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Goblin Don Juan
15 years ago
General
Inane Rambling of a Demented Predator
D&D. Sad to say, with Al the Wizard's player off GMing for a new group, most of the quotes are from me. Ah well.
GM : Are you going to sing the song of Arjhan's battle against the dragon?
Tarmikos : I'm not doing the song, no.
Rumbaba : What, you're going to use interpretive dance?
As it turns out, yes, yes he was.
The Feast of Corellon and simultaneous encroachment of the Feywild looms.
Rumbaba : Buy one reality, get one free.
Tarmikos : Hope ( party's Tiefling Paladin ) isn't here.
GM : Yes, you're completely Hopeless
Trouble in town - Goblins from Rumbaba's estranged clan are pummelling a halfling thief senseless.
Rumbaba : Oh good, this must be a friendly beating. They're not using edged weapons.
GM : Yes. It's not like they caught him screwing the hexer's woman.
Rumbaba : *looks guilty* Yesssss. Admittedly you only need one small knife in that case. Well, not that small.
Forced to intervene before his friends & his clanmembers turn on each other, Rumbaba instantly attracts all the ire of the aforementioned hexer. And the rest of the group find out why Rumbaba has been so keen to avoid his people.
Rumbaba : Hey! Adultery takes two people, alright? Well, sometimes three. And that one time, four.
Rumbaba : I'm sorry I slept with your woman, okay? Well, I'm sorry you found out.
GM : The hexer is going on at some length about how he's going to cut your genitalia off, bake them into a huge sausage, and force-feed it to your father.
Rumbaba : It's not my fault you're undersized!
Rumbaba : You loved your woman, I loved your woman, surely we should be on the same side!
Goblin Skullcrusher : *explaining to the authorities* He's an outlaw from the goblin lands, for moral crimes.
Rumbaba : It was only a few dozen times, alright!
Goblin Skullcrusher : He's not even a good street performer.
Rumbaba : Hey! I managed to juggle your women pretty well!
GM : So you all go to bed.
Rumbaba : I go to somebody's bed.
Adrie : You goblins love fighting, don't you.
Rumbaba : Not me - I'm a lover, not a fighter.
GM : Are you going to sing the song of Arjhan's battle against the dragon?
Tarmikos : I'm not doing the song, no.
Rumbaba : What, you're going to use interpretive dance?
As it turns out, yes, yes he was.
The Feast of Corellon and simultaneous encroachment of the Feywild looms.
Rumbaba : Buy one reality, get one free.
Tarmikos : Hope ( party's Tiefling Paladin ) isn't here.
GM : Yes, you're completely Hopeless
Trouble in town - Goblins from Rumbaba's estranged clan are pummelling a halfling thief senseless.
Rumbaba : Oh good, this must be a friendly beating. They're not using edged weapons.
GM : Yes. It's not like they caught him screwing the hexer's woman.
Rumbaba : *looks guilty* Yesssss. Admittedly you only need one small knife in that case. Well, not that small.
Forced to intervene before his friends & his clanmembers turn on each other, Rumbaba instantly attracts all the ire of the aforementioned hexer. And the rest of the group find out why Rumbaba has been so keen to avoid his people.
Rumbaba : Hey! Adultery takes two people, alright? Well, sometimes three. And that one time, four.
Rumbaba : I'm sorry I slept with your woman, okay? Well, I'm sorry you found out.
GM : The hexer is going on at some length about how he's going to cut your genitalia off, bake them into a huge sausage, and force-feed it to your father.
Rumbaba : It's not my fault you're undersized!
Rumbaba : You loved your woman, I loved your woman, surely we should be on the same side!
Goblin Skullcrusher : *explaining to the authorities* He's an outlaw from the goblin lands, for moral crimes.
Rumbaba : It was only a few dozen times, alright!
Goblin Skullcrusher : He's not even a good street performer.
Rumbaba : Hey! I managed to juggle your women pretty well!
GM : So you all go to bed.
Rumbaba : I go to somebody's bed.
Adrie : You goblins love fighting, don't you.
Rumbaba : Not me - I'm a lover, not a fighter.
