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So, I'm gonna emo rant.
18 years ago
General
So then, I'm sitting here at my computer, doing absolutely nothing and for once it's not even really my fault. I've been calling around most of the day after I had woken up and gotten a phone call from my father. Mind you I didn't crawl out of bed until about 4:15 central time zone.
So I call about after chatting a bit on the computer. I call one friend, his girlfriend answers and she sounds hysterical, laughing while my friend orders I assume chicken from prolly KFC. She finally manages to put him on the phone and we talk a little. Course it turns out he's got plans with his girlfriend already and he won't be available to hang out all weekend.
So Whatever. I figured I had at least one other person to call. So I did. Course it takes three calls over the course of an hour and a half. Finally he answers, but it turns out he's too TIRED to fucking do anything today. Then again he never has any ideas on what to do either that doesn't involve getting one other friend of ours and driving to the tired friends brothers house to play fucking Halo 3, which is a boring ass game, beat in 4 fucking hours. So we decide not to hang out, he probably went to take a nap or something.
So yeah, I'm sitting here, listening to music, depressed as fuck and I can't do anything about it. I have no car. I'm afraid of learning to drive at that. Then there's the undeniable fact that my town blows major fucking ass and there's nothing to do here unless you enjoy sitting around and staring at the mother fucking lake.
So all I can do is sit and think about all the places I've gone wrong. Maybe I just don't try hard enough to go out and do things. Maybe I'm just lazy. Fuck I don't know. Regardless of all that I don't have anything else to do during the week except working my one shift a week down at a resturant dishwashing with some redneck who doesn't seem to realize he's a fucking REDNECK.
I've beaten all my video games to the point that they're just dull to replay for a fifth time, and because I only work one single day a week I don't make enough money to buy new games. I'm trying to get a new job, but that goes about as well as it always does, shit. No matter where I apply they never seem to need someone who can type above after speed and is good with computer. As well as capable of having good people skills. I'm applying at some shit ass factory that stocks shoes, well I applied anyway. If that falls out I'll just apply at this US Cellular place, hopefully they'll need someone with my skills. I don't know.
Well I guess you can call this an emo rant, or just a rant all on it's own, fuck if I really know or give a damn anymore.
I mean why should I care that no one seems to want to give me a chance to prove I' different. Sure this rant isn't helping my case at all, but whoopty-shit. So little people actually try and get to know me or give me another chance it's like there's no point in even trying to change myself. Got people who take one insult and make it a reason to hate me forever. Got other people whos egos get too inflated and think they're too good for people except those with egos as big as fucking theirs. Also got people who hold a grudge for something tiny that I've already appologized for and they just refused to fucking let it go.
I don't know. Maybe I'm just jealous of people lately, everyone of my friends either being able to draw and getting gift art while I can't draw worth spit and no one seems to want to draw any of my characters. I hate asking, maybe that's why I don't get any art. Does that make me selfish? I don't know. I'd love to get gift art from my friends. But I don't want people thinking that's the only reason I'm their friend. I'm glad I know people online who are willing to chat with me at the very least.
My other problem is I've got these sexy gal characters, but I can't seem to get in the mood to play them, unless I get them drawn. So I'm in some sorta semi-circle of roleplaying and art problems. How I went from explaining my bad day to my daily problems. I don't know, but I'm talking about them anyway because I need to vent. Course no one but a select few even know about my page because I'm watching them, and there's the..four who are watching me despite the fact that I never fucking draw or post any pictures.
So I guess when it gets right down to it. I'm a depressed little foxie who'd just like some more attention or affection from his friends in real life or online with roleplaying and the like.
And if you're just gonna exclaim how emo I am and that "Furries, we know drama." Then shut the fuck up you bastards. I never forced any of you to read this shit. So stop acting like it's such a huge ass fucking deal that I have emotional problems. Good christ people. It's GOOD to get your emotions out or you end up being hard as shits who people will end up hating in the long run. Sure whining and complaining doesn't help anyone either, but it doesn't keep emotions locked away.
WEll I'm done. Maybe I'll draw some attention with this, maybe not. Maybe it'll make things worse for me in the furry world because of my attitude. Maybe not. I don't know the future and I'm glad, because that would spoil it.
Regardless of all that. I care about my friends online and in real life, and I love them all in a non-gay way.
The Foxie with problems,
Technic.
So I call about after chatting a bit on the computer. I call one friend, his girlfriend answers and she sounds hysterical, laughing while my friend orders I assume chicken from prolly KFC. She finally manages to put him on the phone and we talk a little. Course it turns out he's got plans with his girlfriend already and he won't be available to hang out all weekend.
So Whatever. I figured I had at least one other person to call. So I did. Course it takes three calls over the course of an hour and a half. Finally he answers, but it turns out he's too TIRED to fucking do anything today. Then again he never has any ideas on what to do either that doesn't involve getting one other friend of ours and driving to the tired friends brothers house to play fucking Halo 3, which is a boring ass game, beat in 4 fucking hours. So we decide not to hang out, he probably went to take a nap or something.
So yeah, I'm sitting here, listening to music, depressed as fuck and I can't do anything about it. I have no car. I'm afraid of learning to drive at that. Then there's the undeniable fact that my town blows major fucking ass and there's nothing to do here unless you enjoy sitting around and staring at the mother fucking lake.
So all I can do is sit and think about all the places I've gone wrong. Maybe I just don't try hard enough to go out and do things. Maybe I'm just lazy. Fuck I don't know. Regardless of all that I don't have anything else to do during the week except working my one shift a week down at a resturant dishwashing with some redneck who doesn't seem to realize he's a fucking REDNECK.
I've beaten all my video games to the point that they're just dull to replay for a fifth time, and because I only work one single day a week I don't make enough money to buy new games. I'm trying to get a new job, but that goes about as well as it always does, shit. No matter where I apply they never seem to need someone who can type above after speed and is good with computer. As well as capable of having good people skills. I'm applying at some shit ass factory that stocks shoes, well I applied anyway. If that falls out I'll just apply at this US Cellular place, hopefully they'll need someone with my skills. I don't know.
Well I guess you can call this an emo rant, or just a rant all on it's own, fuck if I really know or give a damn anymore.
I mean why should I care that no one seems to want to give me a chance to prove I' different. Sure this rant isn't helping my case at all, but whoopty-shit. So little people actually try and get to know me or give me another chance it's like there's no point in even trying to change myself. Got people who take one insult and make it a reason to hate me forever. Got other people whos egos get too inflated and think they're too good for people except those with egos as big as fucking theirs. Also got people who hold a grudge for something tiny that I've already appologized for and they just refused to fucking let it go.
I don't know. Maybe I'm just jealous of people lately, everyone of my friends either being able to draw and getting gift art while I can't draw worth spit and no one seems to want to draw any of my characters. I hate asking, maybe that's why I don't get any art. Does that make me selfish? I don't know. I'd love to get gift art from my friends. But I don't want people thinking that's the only reason I'm their friend. I'm glad I know people online who are willing to chat with me at the very least.
My other problem is I've got these sexy gal characters, but I can't seem to get in the mood to play them, unless I get them drawn. So I'm in some sorta semi-circle of roleplaying and art problems. How I went from explaining my bad day to my daily problems. I don't know, but I'm talking about them anyway because I need to vent. Course no one but a select few even know about my page because I'm watching them, and there's the..four who are watching me despite the fact that I never fucking draw or post any pictures.
So I guess when it gets right down to it. I'm a depressed little foxie who'd just like some more attention or affection from his friends in real life or online with roleplaying and the like.
And if you're just gonna exclaim how emo I am and that "Furries, we know drama." Then shut the fuck up you bastards. I never forced any of you to read this shit. So stop acting like it's such a huge ass fucking deal that I have emotional problems. Good christ people. It's GOOD to get your emotions out or you end up being hard as shits who people will end up hating in the long run. Sure whining and complaining doesn't help anyone either, but it doesn't keep emotions locked away.
WEll I'm done. Maybe I'll draw some attention with this, maybe not. Maybe it'll make things worse for me in the furry world because of my attitude. Maybe not. I don't know the future and I'm glad, because that would spoil it.
Regardless of all that. I care about my friends online and in real life, and I love them all in a non-gay way.
The Foxie with problems,
Technic.
