FA+
Shop
C-PRIME's Movie Reviews #10: Star Wars (Episode I)
14 years ago
General
Star Wars: Episode I (The Phantom Menace)
Released in: 1999
Produced by: 20th Century Fox
Type of Release: Theatrical
Rotten Tomatoes score/my equivalent: 62%/B-
NOTE: The DVD version that I watched had some scratches on it and it skipped a couple of times as I was watching it, which caused me to have to skip a few scenes...though I doubt it would've had any effect on the review
First of all, let me make this perfectly clear. I am not an obsessed Star Wars fan (I'm an obsessed Drawn to Life fan) XD. Seriously though, I do enjoy the original trilogy and have been a fan of it since I first watched it. But that doesn't mean that I would go to a Star Wars convention or dress up like Chewbacca or something like that. Anyway, on with the review...
Prior to last night, this is the only one of the six Star Wars movies that I had never watched and prior to doing my own reviews I had never intended on watching this movie...ever. However, I wanted to review this along with all the other Star Wars movies and I tried to give it a fair chance. How does this movie stand up? Well...let's look at the pros and cons and find out.
What I liked about this movie
+: The Pod Race (even though I felt that it doesn't belong in a Star Wars movie, it was still one of the more entertaining parts of the movie)
+: The lightsaber duel between Qui-Gon+Obi-Wan v. Darth Maul (again, one of the more entertaining parts of the movie)
+: Samuel L. Jackson (because he's Samuel L. Jackson...and arguably the best actor in the entire movie)
+: The return of familiar voices (Frank Oz and Anthony Daniels in particular)
What pissed me off about this movie
-: JAR JAR BINKS! (Believe me, if I could make this text drip with blood or burst into flames I would...that's how much hatred I have for this character. First of all, I can definitely see how many people feel this character is a racist stereotype. Secondly, he isn't fucking funny (the Cinema Snob's theory about how the Tramps are the inspiration for Jar Jar Binks seems pretty accurate to me). However, Jar Jar's biggest sin is the fact that he's OBNOXIOUS AS HELL! I'm serious, if you were to be put in a house where you're next door neighbors are Steve Urkel, Spongebob Squarepants, and Screech from Saved by the Bell...these three combined would be LESS annoying than Jar Jar Binks is)
-: The acting...except for Samuel L. Jackson and the other people I named in the plus category (Queen Amidala is the worst of the bunch, when she's wearing that makeup she talks in a monotone voice. Even BEN STEIN shows more emotion than Queen Amidala. When she's not in that ridiculous get-up, her acting is better though. Aside from that though, there were several other actors that failed to keep my interest. Aside from Amidala, Qui-Gon Jinn was also terrible in this, and don't get me started on that obnoxious rugrat Jake Lloyd)
-: The story's pacing...particularly in the first 1/2 (The movie seemed like it either went too fast or too slow. It seemed as if it couldn't figure out what the correct pace should be)
-: The raping of the original Star Wars' story (one word...Metachlorians. If this were all true, then what was the point of Obi-Wan saying that the Force is derived from all living beings back in the original movie?)
-: Anakin's mother giving him up so easily (I call bullshit on this...NO MOTHER who truly loves and cares about their child would willingly give up her only child to a bunch of people who she hardly knows)
-: The fight scene with all the fighters in space attacking the Droid Command ship (not only was this a letdown, but I also call bullshit on how pipsqueak Anakin could blow it up all by himself. Yeah, I know that he's supposed to be an ace pilot, but I would like to believe that he would have to LEARN IT FROM YEARS OF EXPERIENCE before he could take out such an important target on his own.
-: There's a fart joke...in a "Star Wars" movie?!! (BOOOOOOO!!! NOT FUCKING FUNNY!!!)
Things that made me go WTF about this movie
?: What was the deal with Queen Amidala's hair...it seemed like every time the scene changed so did her hairstyle
?: WHAT THE FUCK DOES ANYTHING IN THIS MOVIE HAVE TO DO WITH STAR WARS?!!
CONCLUSION: This movie has about as much to do with Star Wars as the Star Wars Holiday Special did...sure it introduces some of the main characters, but it does a shitty job of it with it's poorly paced story and raping of the original trilogy...plus the addition of Jar Jar Binks doesn't help either. As a Star Wars movie...IT FAILS! However, it does have a few entertaining moments in it...even though the lion's share of the movie is as dull as dirt and as such, as much as I'd like to...I can't flunk it because at least it did give me some entertainment. Though I will say that it doesn't deserve nearly as high of a score as Rotten Tomatoes has given it
OVERALL GRADE: D- (If it wasn't for the lightsaber duel and the Pod race, this would be an "F" or perhaps even a "SUPER F", but because of these two parts, I can't flunk this. Still, STAY AWAY FROM THIS FUCKING MOVIE!)
Released in: 1999
Produced by: 20th Century Fox
Type of Release: Theatrical
Rotten Tomatoes score/my equivalent: 62%/B-
NOTE: The DVD version that I watched had some scratches on it and it skipped a couple of times as I was watching it, which caused me to have to skip a few scenes...though I doubt it would've had any effect on the review
First of all, let me make this perfectly clear. I am not an obsessed Star Wars fan (I'm an obsessed Drawn to Life fan) XD. Seriously though, I do enjoy the original trilogy and have been a fan of it since I first watched it. But that doesn't mean that I would go to a Star Wars convention or dress up like Chewbacca or something like that. Anyway, on with the review...
Prior to last night, this is the only one of the six Star Wars movies that I had never watched and prior to doing my own reviews I had never intended on watching this movie...ever. However, I wanted to review this along with all the other Star Wars movies and I tried to give it a fair chance. How does this movie stand up? Well...let's look at the pros and cons and find out.
What I liked about this movie
+: The Pod Race (even though I felt that it doesn't belong in a Star Wars movie, it was still one of the more entertaining parts of the movie)
+: The lightsaber duel between Qui-Gon+Obi-Wan v. Darth Maul (again, one of the more entertaining parts of the movie)
+: Samuel L. Jackson (because he's Samuel L. Jackson...and arguably the best actor in the entire movie)
+: The return of familiar voices (Frank Oz and Anthony Daniels in particular)
What pissed me off about this movie
-: JAR JAR BINKS! (Believe me, if I could make this text drip with blood or burst into flames I would...that's how much hatred I have for this character. First of all, I can definitely see how many people feel this character is a racist stereotype. Secondly, he isn't fucking funny (the Cinema Snob's theory about how the Tramps are the inspiration for Jar Jar Binks seems pretty accurate to me). However, Jar Jar's biggest sin is the fact that he's OBNOXIOUS AS HELL! I'm serious, if you were to be put in a house where you're next door neighbors are Steve Urkel, Spongebob Squarepants, and Screech from Saved by the Bell...these three combined would be LESS annoying than Jar Jar Binks is)
-: The acting...except for Samuel L. Jackson and the other people I named in the plus category (Queen Amidala is the worst of the bunch, when she's wearing that makeup she talks in a monotone voice. Even BEN STEIN shows more emotion than Queen Amidala. When she's not in that ridiculous get-up, her acting is better though. Aside from that though, there were several other actors that failed to keep my interest. Aside from Amidala, Qui-Gon Jinn was also terrible in this, and don't get me started on that obnoxious rugrat Jake Lloyd)
-: The story's pacing...particularly in the first 1/2 (The movie seemed like it either went too fast or too slow. It seemed as if it couldn't figure out what the correct pace should be)
-: The raping of the original Star Wars' story (one word...Metachlorians. If this were all true, then what was the point of Obi-Wan saying that the Force is derived from all living beings back in the original movie?)
-: Anakin's mother giving him up so easily (I call bullshit on this...NO MOTHER who truly loves and cares about their child would willingly give up her only child to a bunch of people who she hardly knows)
-: The fight scene with all the fighters in space attacking the Droid Command ship (not only was this a letdown, but I also call bullshit on how pipsqueak Anakin could blow it up all by himself. Yeah, I know that he's supposed to be an ace pilot, but I would like to believe that he would have to LEARN IT FROM YEARS OF EXPERIENCE before he could take out such an important target on his own.
-: There's a fart joke...in a "Star Wars" movie?!! (BOOOOOOO!!! NOT FUCKING FUNNY!!!)
Things that made me go WTF about this movie
?: What was the deal with Queen Amidala's hair...it seemed like every time the scene changed so did her hairstyle
?: WHAT THE FUCK DOES ANYTHING IN THIS MOVIE HAVE TO DO WITH STAR WARS?!!
CONCLUSION: This movie has about as much to do with Star Wars as the Star Wars Holiday Special did...sure it introduces some of the main characters, but it does a shitty job of it with it's poorly paced story and raping of the original trilogy...plus the addition of Jar Jar Binks doesn't help either. As a Star Wars movie...IT FAILS! However, it does have a few entertaining moments in it...even though the lion's share of the movie is as dull as dirt and as such, as much as I'd like to...I can't flunk it because at least it did give me some entertainment. Though I will say that it doesn't deserve nearly as high of a score as Rotten Tomatoes has given it
OVERALL GRADE: D- (If it wasn't for the lightsaber duel and the Pod race, this would be an "F" or perhaps even a "SUPER F", but because of these two parts, I can't flunk this. Still, STAY AWAY FROM THIS FUCKING MOVIE!)
Story Commission Status
NOTE: Commissions usually get top priority when it comes to stories that I owe people...limit of 10 paid commission slots open at one time between FA and Inkbunny (IB commissions are shown in pink text).
1: Fira
2: Bigchris369
3: AsphaltLucario
Freebies (in progress)
rallyranger Bonus Story for purchasing a mini-series commission (In progress: 25% complete)
rayo_elgatubelo Story prize featuring his characters with Charlene (In progress: 25% complete)
Freebies (to be started) and Story Credit
NOTE: Any picture commissions have been converted into story credit ($5 per picture I owed)
rallyranger (1 3-part mini-series prize...separate from commission): Yet to be started...will start working on this as soon as $5 freebie is finished
PRIVATE PRIZE STORY FOR ANONYMOUS: Idea received...yet to be started (I hope to get started soon)
lonewolfsega $5 in story credit available
keeperofjunk $5 in story credit available
thewanderingpikachu $5 in story credit available
jade_styx $10 in story credit available
NOTE: Commissions usually get top priority when it comes to stories that I owe people...limit of 10 paid commission slots open at one time between FA and Inkbunny (IB commissions are shown in pink text).
1: Fira
2: Bigchris369
3: AsphaltLucario
Freebies (in progress)
rallyranger Bonus Story for purchasing a mini-series commission (In progress: 25% complete)
rayo_elgatubelo Story prize featuring his characters with Charlene (In progress: 25% complete)Freebies (to be started) and Story Credit
NOTE: Any picture commissions have been converted into story credit ($5 per picture I owed)
rallyranger (1 3-part mini-series prize...separate from commission): Yet to be started...will start working on this as soon as $5 freebie is finishedPRIVATE PRIZE STORY FOR ANONYMOUS: Idea received...yet to be started (I hope to get started soon)
lonewolfsega $5 in story credit available
keeperofjunk $5 in story credit available
thewanderingpikachu $5 in story credit availablejade_styx $10 in story credit available
I agree with you on alot of this though and theres some serious loopholes in the whole force thing as well which just make you go "WTF"
Remember watching this in the cinema when I was little, it was great. As was everything. Man, everything is great when your little. Especially custard.
But, worst movie of the series, doen't really fit, but did inspire 2 & 3. Both of which were poor.
Original series ftw.
Watched them in the order they were made (I think, not sure about the original).
Watched old series loads of times, episode 1 about twice, and read book, episode 2 probably 5 ish times, 3 once.
And original trillogy wins hands down.
And as for jar-jar, I personally still doesnae see it. Yea, fair enough, he does have some charactestics, but theyre not blatent & made to offend, so ppl need to chill & stop saying "hes like us, your like them". That makes me rage.
THAT'S GOING AGAINST MY MOJO AND FEELINGS FOR THIS MOVIE! IT'S A GOOD ADDITION TO THE SAGA AND IT ANSWERS ALOT OF THE FANS QUESTIONS(i can't even BEGIN listing the questions)!
SURE,it's not that good comparied to the others,but it's great as a STAR WARS movie and it helps move the plot along.YES,JAR JAR IS ANNOING,BUT HE GETS BETTER LATER ON,AND LESS ANNOING.(yay for you)
FART JOKE?! WHERE!?!
jar jar adds SOME MODERATE humor to the series known for it's action(among it's other great things)
and is like the laughable bumbaling idiot who is often accident prone and adds some child-like(funny for adults too) and child-friendly humor that could be better, but for a movie of that time,it was the same as our block-busters like THOR,TRON Legacy(hands down),IRON MAN(1&2),TRANSFORMERS Revenge Of The Fallen,TRANSORMERS Dark of the Moon(soon to be released,July 1st)....you name it, it had the same effect because no one from the 1990's has seen anything better like what was to come.
(I shouldn't argue because every one has their own opinions about everything,mine might be different from yours:something you think is amasing might not be that good to me, and vis virsa)
As a STAR WARS movie from 1999,for me, it's an EPIC WIN( but not the best )
other than that, it's both good and bad, it has its moments and we both like it,THAT I agree with you(among other things)and somethings about it are....not so good,THAT I also agree with you(along with some other things)
It's a good movie though(for it's period's CGI technoligy,which is nothing like what we have today)and also for a STAR WARS movie.
TRUST ME,IT ONLY GETS BETTER FROM HERE> HEY NOW!, THAT'S GOING AGAINST MY MOJO AND FEELINGS FOR THIS MOVIE! IT'S A GOOD ADDITION TO THE SAGA AND IT ANSWERS ALOT OF THE FANS QUESTIONS(i can't even BEGIN listing the questions)!
Alright, describe some of these questions that have been answered by this movie
> SURE,it's not that good comparied to the others,but it's great as a STAR WARS movie and it helps move the plot along.YES,JAR JAR IS ANNOING,BUT HE GETS BETTER LATER ON,AND LESS ANNOING.(yay for you)
Really? Because the movie seemed awfully boring and poorly paced to me, it was hard to pick out any particular moment of interest aside from the lightsaber duel and the pod race. As for Jar Jar, the reason why he's less annoying in latter films is because there is less of him in latter films, likely a result of the majority of fans who hate Jar Jar's guts.
FART JOKE?! WHERE!?!
> About halfway into the movie there is a random creature (I don't know what it's called to be honest) that lets one rip in the direction of Jar Jar and he responds with "Pee-ew-sa" or something along those lines.
jar jar adds SOME MODERATE humor to the series known for it's action(among it's other great things)
and is like the laughable bumbaling idiot who is often accident prone and adds some child-like(funny for adults too) and child-friendly humor that could be better, but for a movie of that time,it was the same as our block-busters like THOR,TRON Legacy(hands down),IRON MAN(1&2),TRANSFORMERS Revenge Of The Fallen,TRANSORMERS Dark of the Moon(soon to be released,July 1st)....you name it, it had the same effect because no one from the 1990's has seen anything better like what was to come.
(I shouldn't argue because every one has their own opinions about everything,mine might be different from yours:something you think is amasing might not be that good to me, and vis virsa)
> Jar Jar did not make me laugh, chuckle, or giggle ONCE...I'm dead serious. R2-D2 and C3PO provided far more humor than Jar Jar did (they're like a mechanical Laurel and Hardy). As for your comments about the other blockbusters you listed...the only one I've seen thus far is the first Iron Man movie (which I liked), but that movie seemed witty and intelligent as well as action-filled. I do have plans on seeing Thor based on the reviews its gotten (I wasn't originally interested in seeing the movie because I don't really care about Thor, but the reviews swayed my opinion). Now, I'm not saying that a movie has to be witty and intelligent to be good (it does help though), but my reviews and consequently my grades boil down to two key elements...did the movie entertain me and was the story engaging and to me, Phantom Menace failed to tell an interesting story (too boring mostly) but it did have some entertainment value during the pod race and the lightsaber duel.
As a STAR WARS movie from 1999,for me, it's an EPIC WIN( but not the best )
other than that, it's both good and bad, it has its moments and we both like it,THAT I agree with you(among other things)and somethings about it are....not so good,THAT I also agree with you(along with some other things)
It's a good movie though(for it's period's CGI technoligy,which is nothing like what we have today)and also for a STAR WARS movie.
> Special effects are like graphics in a video game...they may be nice to look at if they are well done, but they aren't the biggest factor in the eyes of a serious film critic, they're going to pay more attention to the story and the actual content of the movie. Sure, special effects may sway some critic's opinion and to be fair, the scenery and special effects did look good. The problem is, unless there is something really eye-catching about them that I feel is worth mentioning, I usually concentrate on whether a movie is entertaining and tells a good story...and even if special effects do catch my interest, the added boost they would provide is relatively small.
TRUST ME,IT ONLY GETS BETTER FROM HERE> That I believe you on...
Anyway, those are my 2 bits on the wall of text you gave me and I am perfectly aware that other people have differing opinions about this (which explains the movie's score on Rotten Tomatoes), but I also wanted to take the time and explain some of what I felt while watching this and sifting through your comments.
P.S.: For future reference, you need to put the text inside the provided script to center it.