ok Dapps i hate what you have become your being a spoiled bitch! there are worse trhing s in the world than losing a boy friend. you should be happy about what you still have how fucking dare you be suck a bitch She tried helping you she tried figuring out what it is she coudl do to help you anhd you smashed her with guilt and hatred over donavan. im sure saying this is the wrong thing to do and your now going to start saying shit about me well i dont care ive lost wya more than a boyfriend this year.l GROW THE FUCK UP!!!

oh i'm sorry that I haven't been clear that some things worse than donavan happened. Actually I couldn't care less about donavan. And kaitlyn doesn't want to be my friend, she certainly didn't treat me the right way and i'm sick of her, sick of him and everyone who is related to them. If I have to get rid of all those people and be alone, thats the only way I can deal. You don't understand and you don't deserve to, its not even remotely all about donavan. maybe I am a bitch, but i'm not spoiled, everybody thinks things like that, but its not true. Yes my parents used to have enough money to not have to worry about not eating, but no I didn't get everything I wanted or anything of that manner. If I was spoiled I would get what I wanted, and I don't get what I want. If I got what I wanted right now donavan would still care about me and none of this would have ever happened. Donavan would have never lied to the couselers and have them try to send me to the hospital for being mentally ill. If I got what I wanted my parents wouldn't fight all the time and my dad wouldn't tell me how worthless I am every time I walk in the room. If I got what I wanted my grandmother wouldn't be dying and my mom wouldn't have lost her job. If I got what I wanted, then maybe I would be a stuck up spoiled bitch. I am a bitch, but I certainly am not spoiled. I have very good reasons for why I never want to speak to kaitlyn again. You won't believe them or think they're credible becaue your HER friend not mine, and people always believe the person they like better. Thats just the way it goes, and thats fine. I'd rather be alone if people just end up hating me for the only time I ever screw up. The first time that I ever break down or can't handle anything. Suddenly i'm the bad guy, and there is nothing I can do about it because I refuse to lie. I refuse to say things that aren't true. I refuse to sit back and just let everyone push me down again and again, because thats what they'd do. Kaitlyn would post poison after poison in her journal about some little detail of donavan and I would cry myself to sleep because how desperatly I wanted him back. But I can't do that, and the person he has become makes me wish I never met him in the first place. Having her saying 'oh woe is me i'm stuck in the middle and blah blah blah' didn't make me feel any better. I tried as hard as I could not to make it that situation for her, but she obviously wanted that, so I removed myself as so there will be no middle. I don't want to ask people to pick a side because its not a war, its him dumping me and thats it. He broke up with me, I was upset. Suddenly this is a world crisis here huh? People suddenly stop talking to me because who knows why, and of course its all that stupid drama. And if I liked drama I would still be poking around and trying to be friends with her as well as try and get donavan back or something like that.

You know, I really wish I could just move away. Then none of you would ever have to see my ugly pathetic face again, and I could try to move on. Just think back, of course you hate the person i've become, because suddenlly nobody can walk all over me anymore. I can't be who I was anymore, I'd like to see you or anyone else react different in my exact position. What would there be to do? Sure I could continue being pathetic but I would end up killing myself if I went on like that. I'm glad you hate who I am, because I don't. I'm glad i'm a bitch, because now nobody will want to be my friend or get close to me. So I won't have to worry about people like you and everyone else hurting me again and again. I have nothing else to say, because you won't listen anyways

okay im so fed up with the sob stories here. Yeah your life is not perfect jion the club but you still have a family no matter how much they fight it happens. you have never been homeless like i have you have never had to live off of a pound of flour. you have never had to go two fucking years with out water. You have never lost a sister...you sit here and say your life is so fucking horible well take a walk in my fucking shoes you have no idea the emence pain i have in my heart. how dare you asume that im only siding with kaitlyn becouse she is my friend its also becouse your a fucking moron and refuse to lisen to eny one but Becca and your self. You are a selfish bitch.

Your suck a fucking hipocrite telling Kaitlyn that she is a pethetic weekling your no better you ware a fake mask and force your self to act tuff then you start some big sene for attention and run off and cry. Oh yeah your so much better then the rest of us. If you realy want to move on you could just fucking get it over with. You are the one that keeps ripping open old wounds when it realy dosnt fucking patter. you say your over Donavan then you wouldnt care if he dates and moves on with his life you need to grow up and do the same.

Your such a cry baby i never "walked all over you" i was your friend and i thought you were mine but your heaad is to suved up your ass to relize your the one pushing every one away. And you have no right to tell me why i hate who you are now. I hate who you are now becouse your a bitch i liked how you used to be sure there were times you made me feel stupid but every one dose that to me. You used to make me laugh and we used to have fun like the time we all went on the river and scared the rafters becouse her hurt your butt on a rock. THATS the Dapples i liked thats the Dapples i knew and loved now... you think every one is agenst you.

and as far as how i would react in your position you have no idea how much i would love to be in your position. At least then i would still have my sister. I would give up every thing i own and every thing i have to give to have my sister back. You have it so lucky. Yeah your parents are fighting everyones parents Fight.

Dont ever fucking think you know what i lisean to you have no right to asume who and what i lesan to. You think if i didnt care i would even waste my time with your bullshit...Whatever your obvesly content with being a lonly old bitch for th rest of your life. I pitty you your so pathetic it's pathetic that you cant fucking move on. No guy is worht this much drama. I hope your content with being a lonly hag for the rest of your life as long as your happy.

i'd rather be lonely than be with someone like you for the rest of my life. Its not like i'm calling you out or anything, I had no problems with you. But you know what, I don't want to hear it. How about you go your way and I go mine and everything will be just dandy. I never did anything to you, and I will continue to do nothing to you, because the responsible thing is to walk away from people like you. I can't always be happy and silly, and if thats the way you want to be you're asking me to be someone i'm not. We were never really that much alike, even if it seemed like it some times. This proves it. I'm out, just leave me alone and i'll leave you and whoever else alone. If you want i'll stop going to the commons or eating lunch near you if you have that much of a problem with me, because this is me walking away.

i dont want to be cut off im not some stupid puppet i thouhgt i was your friend. Why do you think i even give a damn? You think i am bitching for fun? Im not asking you to be silly and smile all the time thats mymask that i need to hide behind and it works for me. I just want you not be so angry. i want you to not want to be alone. I dont see what if so great about being lonley... it's sad and depresing to not know if any one cares about you.
I dont want you to feel like you need to be suned from the commens i have no problem with you there. it's not like i own the commens or some thing you have every right to eat your lunch on some ones face if you want to... I dont thtink they would like it to much but any way trying to put some humar into this message i guess. I supose i dont realy have the right to tell yuou what you need to do im just trying to help i want every one to be friends. I want to be able to walk by you with kaitlyn and you dont give her the gaze of burning Death. I dont want to lose anything elts in my life thats why im trying so hard to get you to lisean to me. I just wish you could lisen to some one elts other then Becca or who ever on how you should live. I dont want you to be alone.

well kaitlyn said some things that suck, and right now I need some time away from her. I don't really see us being friends anymore since we haven't been getting along anyways. To be truthful I can't stand being anywhere near Donavan right now, the best thing to help me heal is not having to deal with the crap he's been doing. Kaitlyn wants to make herself in the middle of us and I just can't stand to listen to her complain about how much I talk about him or whatever, when all I try to do is be quiet about it because I don't want her to feel that way. She was posting things that upset me in her journals, and its obvious its something that would seriously hurt my feelings. Does she expect me to cry every night because some new fact and then crawl back to her in the morning and pretend it never happend? Whatever it is, its upseting me and making it too hard for me to feel better. She chose to say those things and there is nothing that can take them back. So thats why I'm so upset, because she was hurting me and acting as though it was nothing, and right now I just need to get away from things that hurt. Like donavan, because when he tried to be 'friends' with me for a small amount of time, all he would do was tell me how pathetic I was and how I needed to get over him. It didn't make me feel any better to see the least. Now I know how many lies he told me and i'm glad we're not together anymore, but I still see him and it hurts. When I don't see him or talk to him or anything, I feel a world better. Also if nobody talks about him. I can't avoid him forever, but right now i'm filled with a lot of different unhappy emotions because of him, and since I won't get a true explaination from him as to why all these things happened, I have to try and forget.