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My Weird Dream
14 years ago
General
I should warn you, there are parts of this you may not wish to read. It's not graphic in any sense, but it does contain subject that, if you think about it too much, you will squick yourself. Reader discretion is advised.
* * *
I had the weirdest dream just now. I'm gonna write it up before I forget.
I'm not even sure what all was going on. It's like I was part of a World War II platoon sneaking through enemy territory. Which apparently was some kind of school/stage of some sort. The architecture was a bit mixed up.
Anyway, I forget what happened before I decided to hide in a pipe that wasn't there. I guess there was some Super Mario stuff mixed in; like we were sneakin' past Koopa Troopas. One of them from a patrol actually stopped to stoop down and feel my shoes, remarking on how much they felt like shoes (though I'm not sure if he was a koopa; he did sound American).
Before we go further, I'd like to name this dumkopf after another famous dumkopf, Sergeant Schultz. He deserves it. I mean, unless he was nearly blind in low light, he should've seen me. I could see him.
But he got called away before he could expose me, and a moment later, my platoon moves on, with me jumping down a ledge... and right next to porn of Robotnik, the Warner Brothers and their sister Dot.
....I have no idea why.
In any case, I'm now crouching by a table in a classroom of sorts, even though that makes no sense since it's not lower than the floor I used to come in all of a sudden. And looking around the room, there's porn all over the walls, and much of it not of the sexy kind. It's mostly stuff I find horrific or just plain unattractive, so I try not to look too close (like that one with the roller coaster and the previous characters... eugh). I think a guy I know from some forums was there. American Questor or Otter... I forget. But he's in my platoon and expresses distaste at this raunchy stuff. Either him or someone similar, at least. And I remark to him that it's from not setting the adult filter at Fur Affinity to "No" to stop the porn pics.
I've no idea why this is logical, except to say that I've indeed encountered some truly horrific pornography when bouncing around FA and other similar sites. Some characters just shouldn't have Rule 34 invoked on them. Especially together.
At least I found a couple nice (non-nude) pin-ups of a familiar character. A certain (in)famous bunny boxer who's pretty much divided some of my friends into separate camps over her pics. But at least in these she's clothed, and looks rather beautiful, tossing her hair back, one picture with water flinging off and the other without. If I knew her better, or wanted to risk a former friend's ire, I'd commission them for her. Besides, what's wrong with a woman looking beautiful?
Anyway, things were just about over, though I didn't know it.
The pin-ups mentioned were on a door, which I hid behind. Our platoon gathered around it and were apparently expecting someone or something. Someone came through, and I made the mistake of shutting the door hard behind her. She was an avian anthro, I think, but she was on our side... so I'd just alerted every damn enemy on this floor of our location. Or close to it; sound travels far in school hallways.
We reopen the door and I prepare to ambush whoever comes through. I don't remember standing up, but I did pounce the big guy with muscles and little-to-no hair. Unfortunately, he was followed by some Nazi officer holding a Luger. Won't do me any good to get shot up, so I let go and sorta dance/scamper over to the opposite corner, still close to the group that comes in. Before I can even react, behind the officer comes in...
...Hitler.
I have no idea why, but now things are solidified under the World War II theme. I'm not real sure who we were up against, but they must've been evil to be working with/under Hitler. That is provided they could put up with his inane ranting on My Little Pony or whatever part of the internet has made him snap today.
Don't look at me like that. It's true. I've seen the videos.
In any case, I realize this is actually a good thing, and I point my hand at him in the shape of a gun, I guess to hold him up or something.
It's dream logic. I can't possibly have been thinking straight. I have no magic powers, and I don't think they'll buy the ruse. Doesn't matter anyhow, 'cause I drop it after I see that, after Hitler, walks in...
...Hitler.
Okay, now I've seen this gag. So it makes sense to drop my hand and shake my head. Even I know this can't be serious. He didn't even look like Hitler that much. So, he was either a double... or the real Hitler. After all, with all the romanticizing done in films over the year, I might not expect the real one to look correct.
After this, they bring in some woman, somewhat in her 40's, maybe, wrapped in a blanket... who is apparently a spy of some sort. I don't think she spoke with a German accent, but it hardly matters. She states that she gained her intel by sleeping with one of our guys. I look over at him and he's just grinning, since she admits the sex was pretty good.
(Also, I feel I should state everyone I can see now is human. Not sure what happened to the Bird Lady.)
But because of him, our whole platoon was compromised and our mission exposed. So, even though there's only a couple soldiers in the room (one who snuck in behind me when they brought the woman in), and I don't see any behind my guys, we're pretty much hosed. And at this point, as my vision started to get blurry and I started waking up, I thought up the perfect comeback. I waited my turn and, in a moment of silence, said simply:
"Man, bros before hos!"
Everyone cracked up. At least the platoon did, and they acted like I'd adlibbed a funny line during a play rehearsal, which is kinda what this felt like. They asked me, blinded as I was, if I'd just thought it up. I just tapped my head in response.
And right about then, I woke up, realizing I'd forgotten to charge my phone and thus my alarm did not sound.
Which is why I'm posting this in the afternoon. Darn it. I really should know better than to mess with powder games before bed. I spent hours just staring at that stupid mineral refinery!
Anyway, this was my weird dream for today. Hope you enjoyed.
Now pardon me while I figure out what to do with the other half of my Thursday.
* * *
I had the weirdest dream just now. I'm gonna write it up before I forget.
I'm not even sure what all was going on. It's like I was part of a World War II platoon sneaking through enemy territory. Which apparently was some kind of school/stage of some sort. The architecture was a bit mixed up.
Anyway, I forget what happened before I decided to hide in a pipe that wasn't there. I guess there was some Super Mario stuff mixed in; like we were sneakin' past Koopa Troopas. One of them from a patrol actually stopped to stoop down and feel my shoes, remarking on how much they felt like shoes (though I'm not sure if he was a koopa; he did sound American).
Before we go further, I'd like to name this dumkopf after another famous dumkopf, Sergeant Schultz. He deserves it. I mean, unless he was nearly blind in low light, he should've seen me. I could see him.
But he got called away before he could expose me, and a moment later, my platoon moves on, with me jumping down a ledge... and right next to porn of Robotnik, the Warner Brothers and their sister Dot.
....I have no idea why.
In any case, I'm now crouching by a table in a classroom of sorts, even though that makes no sense since it's not lower than the floor I used to come in all of a sudden. And looking around the room, there's porn all over the walls, and much of it not of the sexy kind. It's mostly stuff I find horrific or just plain unattractive, so I try not to look too close (like that one with the roller coaster and the previous characters... eugh). I think a guy I know from some forums was there. American Questor or Otter... I forget. But he's in my platoon and expresses distaste at this raunchy stuff. Either him or someone similar, at least. And I remark to him that it's from not setting the adult filter at Fur Affinity to "No" to stop the porn pics.
I've no idea why this is logical, except to say that I've indeed encountered some truly horrific pornography when bouncing around FA and other similar sites. Some characters just shouldn't have Rule 34 invoked on them. Especially together.
At least I found a couple nice (non-nude) pin-ups of a familiar character. A certain (in)famous bunny boxer who's pretty much divided some of my friends into separate camps over her pics. But at least in these she's clothed, and looks rather beautiful, tossing her hair back, one picture with water flinging off and the other without. If I knew her better, or wanted to risk a former friend's ire, I'd commission them for her. Besides, what's wrong with a woman looking beautiful?
Anyway, things were just about over, though I didn't know it.
The pin-ups mentioned were on a door, which I hid behind. Our platoon gathered around it and were apparently expecting someone or something. Someone came through, and I made the mistake of shutting the door hard behind her. She was an avian anthro, I think, but she was on our side... so I'd just alerted every damn enemy on this floor of our location. Or close to it; sound travels far in school hallways.
We reopen the door and I prepare to ambush whoever comes through. I don't remember standing up, but I did pounce the big guy with muscles and little-to-no hair. Unfortunately, he was followed by some Nazi officer holding a Luger. Won't do me any good to get shot up, so I let go and sorta dance/scamper over to the opposite corner, still close to the group that comes in. Before I can even react, behind the officer comes in...
...Hitler.
I have no idea why, but now things are solidified under the World War II theme. I'm not real sure who we were up against, but they must've been evil to be working with/under Hitler. That is provided they could put up with his inane ranting on My Little Pony or whatever part of the internet has made him snap today.
Don't look at me like that. It's true. I've seen the videos.
In any case, I realize this is actually a good thing, and I point my hand at him in the shape of a gun, I guess to hold him up or something.
It's dream logic. I can't possibly have been thinking straight. I have no magic powers, and I don't think they'll buy the ruse. Doesn't matter anyhow, 'cause I drop it after I see that, after Hitler, walks in...
...Hitler.
Okay, now I've seen this gag. So it makes sense to drop my hand and shake my head. Even I know this can't be serious. He didn't even look like Hitler that much. So, he was either a double... or the real Hitler. After all, with all the romanticizing done in films over the year, I might not expect the real one to look correct.
After this, they bring in some woman, somewhat in her 40's, maybe, wrapped in a blanket... who is apparently a spy of some sort. I don't think she spoke with a German accent, but it hardly matters. She states that she gained her intel by sleeping with one of our guys. I look over at him and he's just grinning, since she admits the sex was pretty good.
(Also, I feel I should state everyone I can see now is human. Not sure what happened to the Bird Lady.)
But because of him, our whole platoon was compromised and our mission exposed. So, even though there's only a couple soldiers in the room (one who snuck in behind me when they brought the woman in), and I don't see any behind my guys, we're pretty much hosed. And at this point, as my vision started to get blurry and I started waking up, I thought up the perfect comeback. I waited my turn and, in a moment of silence, said simply:
"Man, bros before hos!"
Everyone cracked up. At least the platoon did, and they acted like I'd adlibbed a funny line during a play rehearsal, which is kinda what this felt like. They asked me, blinded as I was, if I'd just thought it up. I just tapped my head in response.
And right about then, I woke up, realizing I'd forgotten to charge my phone and thus my alarm did not sound.
Which is why I'm posting this in the afternoon. Darn it. I really should know better than to mess with powder games before bed. I spent hours just staring at that stupid mineral refinery!
Anyway, this was my weird dream for today. Hope you enjoyed.
Now pardon me while I figure out what to do with the other half of my Thursday.
Although i have yet to have a furry dream, i wonder what one of those is like :p
I think the weirdest dream that I remember involved me crossing Equestria to save the 5th Doctor from Killer trees...
fascinating dream. Hopefully it wasn't a wet one
Also, I'm not so into the Nazi uniform stuff. Or Hitler, really.
As for what I do... not much, now that school's out. Suppose I should see about a job, lest my parents get me another "fun" one that drives me up the wall. No idea why that stuff popped into my dream.