Maybe not the most fitting title, but my neck/head hurts, and I am really tired, so thinking has taken a back seat for a while here, so please bear with me.

What I am trying to refer to, is that yes in my mind, I suspect myself to be openminded to all things sexual. Art even moreso, it matters not the genders if any of the creatures/people/etc involved in the image. It seems there is something more unique and arousing in art, then there can be in real life.

For me, I also know that my body seems to be really weird when it comes to physical sensation, or perhaps I should say, the lack of. Most of the time, my body feels as though there is something like a forcefield or some other barrier type thing that seems to prevent most forms of tactile sensation to go through.

I could for example, smack my arm hard to the point where it looks to be bright red, but barely feel anything.

The reason I bring this up in this topic of discusion is that if I were to have someone who wanted to have sex with me, it would more then likely be a one way street, where I may be able to give that person pleasure without feeling any of my own. Is this good, or bad, who knows? All I know, is that it does seem a bit silly to try all sorts of sexual things, only to feel bad that your partner is feeling bad for not being able to arouse you or whatnot.

It seems that very little seems to work for me when trying to pleasure myself. I do seem to be the only one able to do it. And even then, there are a rather selective amount of things that can really help me. It seems that using just my hand normal has no real effect. Usually a bath towel, be it damp or dry seems to work well. Condoms seem to add a bit of sensitivity to my junk down there. Other then that, not much else. Using a dildo for example, pretty much nothing pleasurable. Various forms of "stimulating" gels or lubes or whatnot, barely have any effect on me.

My body indeed seems to be rather weird like that.

Of course, maybe part of me is worrying about this a tad bit is because of society's (And parents) viewpoint of how people need to do this and that & have children and blablabla.

I don't know, maybe tiredness is making me overthink things a bit. Sometimes, I do feel as though I am something somewhat different then what could be considered a "Normal" human. Maybe a bit on the unique side?

ONe crazy thing about all this is that despite my body's physical desensitivity, I do seem to have a rather high sex drive or someething. I usually need to masturbate every night, otherwise I can't sleep unless I am ultra dead tired from something, and even sometimes the morning after I have another crank session. Talk about craziness.

Anywho, thanks for listening to my ramblings. Comment if you want. Otherwise, thanks for reading. I hope everyone has a wonderful memorial day and rest of the week.