Seriously. In the last two weeks I have worked every day EXCEPT 1 I am some kind of workaholic who is now resorting to drinking coffee to stay awake at my job and make the day go faster, I get home and I am tired and usually fall asleep. I have gutrott from the nasty coffee and I am finding that I am developing a dependancy on it as now if I don't have my 1 cup my motor skills are SHOT and I move at half speed and feel extremely heavy no matter how much sleep I do or do not get.

My parent's are "so proud" that I'm such a "hard worker" I keep wondering... what is to be proud of??? I'm working insane hours for minimal pay and even picking up extra hours and giving up more of my life to make even 100 dollars more from this company that doesn't really care OR KNOW who I am.

Seriously I am not joining the mass of zombies in this world who work their butts off their whole life and get nowhere. It's pathetic. The people who work the hardest make the least amount of money and get the least recognition but singers, athletes, and some guy who made elastic animal bracelets are on top of the world... It doesn't make sense to me.. What ever happened to good ol' communist values (JOKING!!!)

I need to get my stomach medication refilled before I die from coffee. OH AND GET THIS. Canada Post may go on Strike and I may or may not get my medical mail which means my appointment on the 15th will be cancelled.. oh that means it will reschedule for SEPTEMBER!!! and that's at the earliest. Thankfully my province has protocal in place for if the post office does go on strike but let's just hope it works... Plus the endocrinologists secretary is not getting ahold of me in a timely manner... ugh..

The only way I can justify being a corporate zombie is that I am doing it for  sultry and to transition and be who I need to be... I just hope my dreams of the future are no delusions and I don't become a zombie working for a corporation all my life... I would sooner die. A friend of mine just got moved up... he was a cool guy and I enjoyed talking with him... but now he's in contact with our contracting company and he's all high and mighty and lectures me when it isn't even his job... They flipped him... he has this delusion the company cares about him. He says things to sound important... I see this all the time... people pretending our contractor cares and making everything sound significant... It's sad... I never want to be like that.