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Vent
14 years ago
Ragh, ignore plz.
The proudest moment of my life was when my motorcycle started up after I rebuilt it. I don't know why this was possibly the most significant short-term accomplishment of my life, but it made me think a little bit.
Why am I putting so much effort into engineering school when I find much more enjoyment and fulfillment when I work with my hands or are teaching someone? The easy answer is that I can do what needs to be done for engineering and that I should not do any less than what is possibly the limit of my skill in order to get the highest level job possible as soon as possible to exert my influence and gain control over the largest spectrum that I can before my mental dexterity begins to degrade. Yes, that is the simple answer for me.
But, why don't I move out west and be a mechanic or a teacher or a writer? I can be any of those things very easily and with less work than what is currently before me.
I suppose that I don't need a master plan. What good is a plan to save humanity when they are so self-destructive anyways?
In other news, pretty sure I'm going to be out of the military. Bright side of that: I can grow my hair long again (much love!) and I can get back on methylphenadate for school. I miss that stuff. It was exactly what I needed, placebo or not, ant it evened me out without being a direct control.
The proudest moment of my life was when my motorcycle started up after I rebuilt it. I don't know why this was possibly the most significant short-term accomplishment of my life, but it made me think a little bit.
Why am I putting so much effort into engineering school when I find much more enjoyment and fulfillment when I work with my hands or are teaching someone? The easy answer is that I can do what needs to be done for engineering and that I should not do any less than what is possibly the limit of my skill in order to get the highest level job possible as soon as possible to exert my influence and gain control over the largest spectrum that I can before my mental dexterity begins to degrade. Yes, that is the simple answer for me.
But, why don't I move out west and be a mechanic or a teacher or a writer? I can be any of those things very easily and with less work than what is currently before me.
I suppose that I don't need a master plan. What good is a plan to save humanity when they are so self-destructive anyways?
In other news, pretty sure I'm going to be out of the military. Bright side of that: I can grow my hair long again (much love!) and I can get back on methylphenadate for school. I miss that stuff. It was exactly what I needed, placebo or not, ant it evened me out without being a direct control.
I hope you find that zen :)
Of course, I think about this kind of shit waaaaay too much. Probably comes from too much time alone.