Hmm... its been...

far too long...

Well i still have a broken tablet so im unable to draw as i want to, but regardless of that i am in between houses with out a laptop and i wont risk damage to my desktop with constant moving so reality is if i had a tablet i wouldn't be able to keep drawing on a basis i would like to. though despite this i have been drawing with pen and paper, i should say i just started too again but still with the amount of time i have daily its not realistic to try and keep drawing stable and daily.

Alot of things have happened, and in all honesty im somewhat bothered by my current situation despite the fact that i am getting out more often then i have since i moved to the city, atleast then i was living at one place and could go on my computer with ease when ever i so pleased. its been years since ive been back in my hometown and still finding a stable job has been hell... infact i still dont have one, i have been working odd jobs to keep myself mobile with my car which seem like it could give out any day in which case i would prolly move back home to live here rather then where i stay mainly now.

i have a gf.. and it seems kinda crazy as its been my longest relationship i had ever had, though still i cant shake the paranoia of being cheated on or worse. dealing with it is half the battle the reality of it is it COULD happen as it had happened to me before, thank god im slowly starting to exile my own feelings in which case caring is not going to be apart of the finished product. Of course id still care about animals and my own but still theres only so much you can do before you snap and go on a killing spree killing all the crackheads in your neighborhood. did i mention two just moved in down the street?

Gaming... oh sweet gaming how i loath not having a mobile computer that i could play games on, and how i can not play the game i have waited for, for years... diablo 3 needs to come out... IT HAS TOO... its one of my motivating factors that keeps me from slipping and going on a emotion repressed rampage. playing the beta seems like a impossibility especially with my living situations, im unable to ride blizzards dick in hopes that i would get the demo and key, prolly better off as my patients wares thine when it comes to sitting around waiting for sit to happen when in all reality it may not and most likely not happen.. i mean fuck.

My cat is doing fine, and now i have a husky of whome should have pups sometime in the near future. also one of the things thats keeping me from slipping, sure it would be alot of work to take care of them and work on finding them good homes and then keeping tabs after them after they find said homes. but i think things will work out, maybe not today... maybe not tomorrow but eventually i do hope things work out for the better.

a job, laptop, tablet, car (thats not on the verge of exploading), maybe even a house out in the woods where i could be in my element again and not have to think about shit too hard and relax under a shady tree... well maybe its a pipe dream, maybe not. intell then...

i hating these fucking crackheads might be okay for now even though it pisses me off to no end.

-SynisterWrath