Coming out, ocarina's and my voice. -- Yuma's Journal -- Fur Affinity [dot] net

Coming out, ocarina's and my voice.

14 years ago

So unfortunately being transgender in the early stages I have to come out repeatedly to varying people if they find out. So I am kind of making a game of it now as it's really awkward. This time it was a man from work who I greatly respect. He is in the same position as I am, maybe a bit higher actually.

On my facebook I posted about how I bought a new bra and complained how the stores didn't have good enough sports bras so he comes up to me and here's the story:

Coworker: "So what's thhis I hear about you buying a sports bra?" his tone was somewhat sarcastic as if he was embarassing me

Me: I looked up at him from my desk and raised my eyebrows innocently "I'm on pills, I'm transgender."

Coworker: His eyes widened in shock and his draw almost dropped as he went silent for a moment. "really...? I didn't know?"

Me: No not many here do until they add me to facebook or ask what the pills are for."

Coworker: His face was still one of shock and he stared into the distance silently I could not fathom what things were going through his head

Me: I looked up at him with wide eyes and smiled saying in a high voice "Surprise"

Coworker: He smiled "I guess so"

I got a call and he walked away but within minutes he came back and apolagised saying he supports it as long as it makes me happy.

Cool situation eh?

---

Also I ordered an ocarina just a cheap practice one but I want to learn. I have been really depressed and got a burst of energy and I ordered it so I can play away my blues...plus it brings me to my happy place. I find when I'm really down I listen to Zelda music and it makes me dream of how I always thought the world would be.

Also I have not been working on my voice... I have come to the realization that I don't like talking. I don't talk when I'm home and I enjoy not speaking. I feel my voice hides who I really am and that to express myself I must be silent. So hopefully learning an instrument will give me voice. I need to learn to speak better and I need to nip this fast before I don't want to speak at all.

Oh and I am currently without a therapist at all for my transgender needs... I am concerned greatly and hope to hera from one soon as I dn't know what happens if I am on HRT without a therapist

22 Comments

OreoFen ~oreofen

Mechanic

14 years ago

That's a good thing that your coworker was on the kool side and didn't go phycho or something, I hope all your other coworkers even your boss will be fine with that. I've only had one trans friend MtF, but he went on some pills or something and seems fine but not as peppy as he use tobe, even so he's still a good friend of mine and we talk every now and then when he wants to. I hope things work out for you, the US is starting to get less worse in my opinion since NY became a same sex marrige state, I'd think people would be less harse on others but you'll still get your occasional Ahole that just has to ruin everyones day ya know? the only thing I think that gives trans gen people a hard time is getting the opperation cause I read what medical places charge for such an operation and its not cheap, pretty much goes w/o saying the saying "Its going to cost you an arm and leg". But again I hope things work out for you :3

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

Well I'm in Canada so in that way I'm fortunate. So far no one has freaked out luckily. I know with some people the pills can make them depressed and moody luckily I'm just as peppy as ever. There is nothing in this world that can destroy my pep! =^_^=

OreoFen ~oreofen

Mechanic

14 years ago

Thats good to hear ^^ being depressed can sux x.x

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

Yeah. I still get depressed as I have always been like that but I'm used to it so I've learned to be high functioning despite depression..

Also I've meant to tell you this forever but I LOVE your icon it is so apropriate given your name.

OreoFen ~oreofen

Mechanic

14 years ago

Yep, I decided on my account name based on my sonas colors black/white like a oreo cookie x3

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

Smart move.

Also pet peeve: Click reply to post every time to a new post it makes things more organized

OreoFen ~oreofen

Mechanic

14 years ago

I do, do that but usally on my own submissions cause if I post w/o replying the person who commented wouldn't know if I replied or not. Also I do the reply to post on peoples's subs if theres tons of people spamming the submission. =s

Woofle ~woofle

Princess Fish Fox

14 years ago

That sounds like it could've been really awkward! I'm glad that he supports you. You seem to be handling this with a sense of levity that really takes a lot of strength.

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

Levity...this is a new word to me. I guess so I just try to make light of everything it eases stress and I enjoy it.

Woofle ~woofle

Princess Fish Fox

14 years ago

That's a really positive way to handle it! I think that's the best way to approach life in general. Stay strong. :3

OreoFen ~oreofen

Mechanic

14 years ago

Heh I know that! Usually listening to music and finding things to do make my life easy, however though if I run out of stuff to do I can feel a bit depressed and probably will just sleep through the day to forget about it =/

-Willifred- ~-willifred-

Art Whore

14 years ago

I bet I can help you with the ocarina! Im actually a miniature ocarina internet sensation: The Ocarina Idol check it on youtube! It is a PERFECT instrument for what you are looking for. And its good to see there are still good people in the world as well!

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

It looks like it won't be painful to learn and I would be able to see results quickly. Plus it's portable and holds loads of memories. I will watch your vid in a few if you would tutor me if I have trouble I would genuinely appreciate it beyond words

-Willifred- ~-willifred-

Art Whore

14 years ago

No problem! im only on for a few seconds, but I got kinda famous for it. i play over 20 instruments so ask away! Are you looking to do improv stuff or something else?

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

Right off I want to learn to play all the Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time songs (I know i'm a nerd) but yeah immediatly that. After that I want to learn to play and make music for ocarina on my own for it

Fox-Phantom ~fox-phantom

Anthro Artist

14 years ago

That's good the situation went good.

Also playing a ocarina is fun, I love playing it because the way it sound is amazing. ^__^

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

I agree they have a BEAUTIFUL sound.

Fox-Phantom ~fox-phantom

Anthro Artist

14 years ago

Indeed, and hopefully I will get my 12 hold ocarina soon. since I have been playing with a 6 hole for a year.

Fox-Phantom ~fox-phantom

Anthro Artist

14 years ago

I meant 12 hole.

Yuma ~yuma

Digital Artist

14 years ago

Yeah I hear you don't have to half cover holes with them which would be super nice!

Are ocarinas ever made of wood I have mostly seen ceramic and porsaline ones. They seem so breakable.

Fox-Phantom ~fox-phantom

Anthro Artist

14 years ago

My pendent ocarina is ceramic, but the 12 hole I am getting is plastic. But I have heard that the ocarina from songbird ocarinas plays very well even it is plastic.

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