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Just a quick update about personal life and what not
14 years ago
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF NIBBLER: I might be hired to dogsit Charlie and Lucy again. And hopefully next time Charlie will bark less...
I was looking through an old letter and drawings my auntie Megan mailed me back in 2007. Yeah, they're pretty old, but every year since I got the mini package I take it out of my closet and look through it, reading the 3 page letter. Usually it makes me smile and laugh, but for some reason this time I started crying. First it was sad tears, then happy tears, then sad tears, etc. I don't know why I cried this time... Maybe it's because I miss Megan so much. She was my bestfriend before she left for Montreal; I still remember how she used to always come over and we'd walk to a coffee shop, no matter how far, and have some coffee... I hope she has enough money to come visit this next Christmas like she said.
So, due to my dogsitting, I didn't tell my dad about how I want to change up my living arrangement. I really want to do it ASAP so he has time to think about my request and so we'll be able to figure some thing out before school starts... I've been thinking about it for almost a year now, but I'm still scared that I'll hurt his feelings badly. He's my dad and I love him, but that house is just... it doesn't feel like a home. Yeah, I have the best luxuries over there; a laptop, scanner, printer, new clothes every other week, money from having a good reportcard... but I don't feel like that's the place that I'm supposed to live and I've learned to ignore that feeling, but it can't be healthy to do so.
Stress lvl: 0. There's things that I did and said last school year and in the summer that have really improved things for me and others. It hurts to say that some of the friends I lost nearly got rid of the stress, but it's true. And maybe it's because I no longer feel like I have to do and say things to match their ideas of the person they want me to be. I've also come clean to my parents when I lie to them, which is literally close to never; the only time I've lied to them is to protect one of my friend's privacy, but I still come clean and tell them why I felt like I had to lie. It helps. I feel like a better person and I've gotten out of my random depressions. Strangely enough, despite the lack of stress and negativity, it's become harder to keep my face blemish free. O.o'
Art and writing hasn't interested me like it used to... When I put my pen to the paper, the ideas don't flow like they used to. I have to think about what to write or draw, and even then some times I can't come up with any thing. It's troublesome to me because I was drawing before I could walk, and speaking better than most 6 year olds before I was even 4. Creativity is in my blood from generations that continue to go back farther than any of us can count. Drawing, writing, speaking. These things aren't only part of my identity, they make who I am and are so deeply rooted in my life, I can't imagine doing any thing else. And to have these things become uninteresting and difficult to do is like... there's no metaphor that can describe it. Maybe I just need to take a break from it, but then who am I without it? It is who I am.
I look forward to my two terms of cooking classes next school year; I can't survive off tea and noodle cups for the rest of my life! I really want to learn how to make leek soup, wanton noodle soup, bean paste buns, and smoked salmon. <3 I'm getting hungry just talking about them...
I think I'm going to apply for a job at my mom's work. They sell spa supplies, fireplaces, and hot tubs. Working some where like there would be really good in helping me reach my career goal! All I have to do is complete highschool with the grades I have now and go to collage for two years, perferably helped by a scholarship, and then I can work at an aqarium! And if I have job history in dealing with pool chemicals and whatnot, I'm much more likely to get a well-paying job. :) Plus, if I do apply and get the job, I get to work with my mom, so that's just an awesome bonus!
Welp, that's all I can really think of right now. I hope you all have a nice day.
I was looking through an old letter and drawings my auntie Megan mailed me back in 2007. Yeah, they're pretty old, but every year since I got the mini package I take it out of my closet and look through it, reading the 3 page letter. Usually it makes me smile and laugh, but for some reason this time I started crying. First it was sad tears, then happy tears, then sad tears, etc. I don't know why I cried this time... Maybe it's because I miss Megan so much. She was my bestfriend before she left for Montreal; I still remember how she used to always come over and we'd walk to a coffee shop, no matter how far, and have some coffee... I hope she has enough money to come visit this next Christmas like she said.
So, due to my dogsitting, I didn't tell my dad about how I want to change up my living arrangement. I really want to do it ASAP so he has time to think about my request and so we'll be able to figure some thing out before school starts... I've been thinking about it for almost a year now, but I'm still scared that I'll hurt his feelings badly. He's my dad and I love him, but that house is just... it doesn't feel like a home. Yeah, I have the best luxuries over there; a laptop, scanner, printer, new clothes every other week, money from having a good reportcard... but I don't feel like that's the place that I'm supposed to live and I've learned to ignore that feeling, but it can't be healthy to do so.
Stress lvl: 0. There's things that I did and said last school year and in the summer that have really improved things for me and others. It hurts to say that some of the friends I lost nearly got rid of the stress, but it's true. And maybe it's because I no longer feel like I have to do and say things to match their ideas of the person they want me to be. I've also come clean to my parents when I lie to them, which is literally close to never; the only time I've lied to them is to protect one of my friend's privacy, but I still come clean and tell them why I felt like I had to lie. It helps. I feel like a better person and I've gotten out of my random depressions. Strangely enough, despite the lack of stress and negativity, it's become harder to keep my face blemish free. O.o'
Art and writing hasn't interested me like it used to... When I put my pen to the paper, the ideas don't flow like they used to. I have to think about what to write or draw, and even then some times I can't come up with any thing. It's troublesome to me because I was drawing before I could walk, and speaking better than most 6 year olds before I was even 4. Creativity is in my blood from generations that continue to go back farther than any of us can count. Drawing, writing, speaking. These things aren't only part of my identity, they make who I am and are so deeply rooted in my life, I can't imagine doing any thing else. And to have these things become uninteresting and difficult to do is like... there's no metaphor that can describe it. Maybe I just need to take a break from it, but then who am I without it? It is who I am.
I look forward to my two terms of cooking classes next school year; I can't survive off tea and noodle cups for the rest of my life! I really want to learn how to make leek soup, wanton noodle soup, bean paste buns, and smoked salmon. <3 I'm getting hungry just talking about them...
I think I'm going to apply for a job at my mom's work. They sell spa supplies, fireplaces, and hot tubs. Working some where like there would be really good in helping me reach my career goal! All I have to do is complete highschool with the grades I have now and go to collage for two years, perferably helped by a scholarship, and then I can work at an aqarium! And if I have job history in dealing with pool chemicals and whatnot, I'm much more likely to get a well-paying job. :) Plus, if I do apply and get the job, I get to work with my mom, so that's just an awesome bonus!
Welp, that's all I can really think of right now. I hope you all have a nice day.
I've tried to get the motivation, but even when I get an idea on what to draw, I can't put the image on paper. Same with writing.
and what, a woman that cannot cook?
..what.. what are you?!
*hugs*
Stay positive!
That's sweet. But it might be a good training for you. Whatever helps you dear. Go for it.