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Finished college
14 years ago
General
See my exposition/gallery website!
Info on prices and skillset there, as well as my best examples.
http://h1.ripway.com/ucnux/XuncuFla.....teV2/home.html
http://h1.ripway.com/ucnux/Flash%20.....uncu_flash.htm
Info on prices and skillset there, as well as my best examples.
http://h1.ripway.com/ucnux/XuncuFla.....teV2/home.html
http://h1.ripway.com/ucnux/Flash%20.....uncu_flash.htm
And really really depressed about it.
I haven't made any real friends within college-- save for one, that ended badly because she didn't want to love me. Plus the other this past month, too, same thing.
I'm upset that I'm now 25, never had a girlfriend, and most of my friends ever, especially all of them now, are only online.
I feel that the hard-wired obligation that being family has to be with each other is not what I need in terms of company; thus, I feel alone even if with family. THe honest truth is I'd rather be with friends than family-- if I had any friends.
I consider a real friend is someone I (would) see on a regular basis, someone who makes time to share time with each other. When I chat or IM or Comment online to friends.... it's only that; a line of text on a screen, unsatisfying. I shouldn't have to schedual a vacation to see a friend.
I'm starved for physical contact, so I want to get close. When I got too close, that's supposedly the 'one thing' that scared both of those girls off. Dunno if same for all the other girls I only got so far as a chat at the cafeteria and giving them my info--- of which, they never use to reach out to me.
I tried that, i tried through dating sites, craigslist, facebook, to either find a mate or a friend, and rare is the spark I seek that could give me what I want, if they ever had the gumption to step outside their cliques and unrealistic expectations.
I'm a 25-year olf college graduate, dunno if I'll ever be on a campus again-- esepcially at this age, plus how old I may be if I ever do go to another universty or grad school or something, when it might/will be creepy for me to be so old compared to-what, 18-19 year olds? One more reason for them to not want to interact with me....
And all thsi time has passed me byw ith no real friends to show for it, only a broken heart and bitter memories and feelings of neglect and resentment.
I've had the hosue to myself for lenghts of time before, during school, and now I am afriad that's what the rest of my life is gonna be; alone at home, only going out to work and errands, friendless.
I haven't made any real friends within college-- save for one, that ended badly because she didn't want to love me. Plus the other this past month, too, same thing.
I'm upset that I'm now 25, never had a girlfriend, and most of my friends ever, especially all of them now, are only online.
I feel that the hard-wired obligation that being family has to be with each other is not what I need in terms of company; thus, I feel alone even if with family. THe honest truth is I'd rather be with friends than family-- if I had any friends.
I consider a real friend is someone I (would) see on a regular basis, someone who makes time to share time with each other. When I chat or IM or Comment online to friends.... it's only that; a line of text on a screen, unsatisfying. I shouldn't have to schedual a vacation to see a friend.
I'm starved for physical contact, so I want to get close. When I got too close, that's supposedly the 'one thing' that scared both of those girls off. Dunno if same for all the other girls I only got so far as a chat at the cafeteria and giving them my info--- of which, they never use to reach out to me.
I tried that, i tried through dating sites, craigslist, facebook, to either find a mate or a friend, and rare is the spark I seek that could give me what I want, if they ever had the gumption to step outside their cliques and unrealistic expectations.
I'm a 25-year olf college graduate, dunno if I'll ever be on a campus again-- esepcially at this age, plus how old I may be if I ever do go to another universty or grad school or something, when it might/will be creepy for me to be so old compared to-what, 18-19 year olds? One more reason for them to not want to interact with me....
And all thsi time has passed me byw ith no real friends to show for it, only a broken heart and bitter memories and feelings of neglect and resentment.
I've had the hosue to myself for lenghts of time before, during school, and now I am afriad that's what the rest of my life is gonna be; alone at home, only going out to work and errands, friendless.
In all seriousness, an oft-ignored transition from childhood to adulthood is the moment when you realize that the definition of "friendship" has changed drastically. As a child, your friends are people you share your life with. You see them all the time, you spend lots of time with them, you share everything with them. As you enter adulthood, you and your friends wind up filling your lives with dating, college, work, marriage, children, pets, conflicting schedules, bills, chores, ailing parents, doctor's appoinments and all the other time-consuming detritus of adulthood, the childish constant-company of your earlier friendships becomes incredibly difficult and taxing for everyone involved. Your friendships change into slow, steady things.. you may go months without seeing each other but when you do, it's as if no time had passed. It's weird to carry a relationship that way but it's part of being an adult.
Congrats on getting through school. Good luck on everything that follows. My best advice is to not stress about it too much... if you meet someone, you meet them. If you don't, try to accept that it's just how things are for you right now. But don't become a hermit. Go out, do things you enjoy. Hit up local places people hang out (bookstores, coffee shops, art galleries, poetry jams, street fairs) and make a point of talking to people. Strangers are just a friend you haven't made yet! :)
What makes it so hard that those young friendships were so far and few between, that I am worried I am incapbable of adult friendships, too.
Sometimes I feel too young, like how I physically age slowly.
Sometimes I feel ancient.