dont be sorry i know how bad life can be im stuck in a shit hole neck high with no way out from what i see but always small things you can try to find to cheer up ive been suicidal before and almost did but a phone call stopped that and im glad it happened hope it helps me saying this in anyway trust me sometime just saying something like you did is a good way to vent too

Thank you, that's what I was hoping for. To vent. To be honest this isn't the first time I've felt this close to breaking down, and before I had managed to stumble accidentally upon one of those websites that help the suicidal or whatever... its comic relief page actually managed to lift my spirits at that time.

If you ever need it, here's the page - http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/ (Ironically, I was looking for help on HOW to suicide when I found this... not suicide prevention help orz;; )

thank you if i ever need it ill be sure to look to it thank you

It always helps to get things out, it really does.

Hope everything works out for you, I wish I could help, but I'm no good at helping. XD

I find it difficult to talk to you at tmes because I can't simply ignore these kinds of things, but I also don't know any ways to improve them. I like you as a person and it dissappoints me to know you feel this way, it seems rather undeserving =( I'm always happy to, at the very least, be there you could talk to.

I consider you a buddy still, and I wished we talked more like back when we used to ;w; Message me anytime! I'm sorry to have burdened you like this though v_v It's not something I tend to blog about or inform people of... I just couldn't hold it back this time. I at least try to seek help when I feel I am seriously close, because it's not something I REALLY want to do in the end v_v;; I just don't want to do that to people around me. It may have been better if I'd never been born at all - or was at least miscarried - and sometimes I wish that more than anything :c

I never seeee you anymore =( and no, you don't really burden me...but sometimes I just don't know wht to say D: things haven't been sunshine all around -_-;

I have felt this way at times. One of the main things that has kept me from doing it is the fact that there might actually be something after you die. It's not like one can actually know if there is or not, unless of course that person is actually dead. Living is about all I can do these days, and with the world in the current state it is, I don't see me being able to do much else other then that. If you want to keep going to see what might become of the world, then I would encourage that. It's what I'm doing right now while I try to get my life off to a better start then it's at right now. I've been lost with what I want to do for many a year now, and I can't be the one to tell you that it's easy to figure out what you want. Seeing as I still haven't done so. What I can tell you is that the ride to the end is what you make of it, so at least try to make it enjoyable. Hopping off before you reach the end could possibly ruin the surprise. There's also no "courage" in blowing your brains out. That's just the quickest way out to a possible end that you might not want. Or it could just lead to nothing, like I said, no one can be sure about that. I guess we will all find out when we reach that point, seeing as everything dies at some point. But, while I'm still alive, I'd rather experience what I can. Make my own world an adventure as it were.

Wow, look at all that rambling. Just know that sometimes the easy way out isn't the best ending to that adventure of yours. Try to make your experiences worth the time you spent here. Good luck with whatever you choose, I hope you will stick around.

Thank you for your words! I am grateful for the good intentions. I honestly think it's the same reason I keep going as well, that and the fact that even though my family barely cares, they will care and they will hurt once they were informed. That is something I do not want to put them through either...

Life is suffering. Tomorrow can always be better.

If you can internalize that, you'll feel better, you'll do be better, you'll be better.

For myself, I find working out helps. Walks, runs, pushups, kettlebell workouts, stretches. I also remember the price that my friends and family would have to pay if I did kill myself. Finally, I find that my belief that things will get better functions as a final anchor.

The most important thing is to keep putting one foot in front of the other, to understand that to live is to suffer, and though victory is impossible, all you need to do to keep from losing is to continue to struggle, to continue to fight.

Dei volunt.

:C I need to talk to you missy!