The time will come when you will have the courage to disclose your orientation to your parents. Its not necessary to do so, unless its eating at you you inside. Sometimes the truth sets you free and other times it imprisons you. Basically, you need to weigh the risk/benefit factor with regard to your parents. Get a piece of paper out and write down the pros in one column and the cons int he other. Which ever columns has the greatest number of entries is the one that you should go with.

In the meantime, protect your orientation while at home and if you meet someone for intimacy, embrace that. Big hugs to you ^.^

Thanks dog-paws. You always help me to figure my shit out. My father was a deadbeat who left when I was ten. I got over it, but had an extremly bad panic attack last october when I realized i was exclusively gay. I'm afraid if i tell my mom, i'll be rejected by the only parent who still loves and supports me. I've come to accept, and be comfortable with myself, but the loneliness and lying are such a bad mix.

Your Mom loves you and she will love you regardless of your sexual orientation. It may not be the right time to tell her but you will, when and if you're ready. Just take it one day at a time and don't stress over it. Your life will improve with time and time is your friend ^.^

You also seem to have3 a growing list of followers here that obviously care about you, so revel in that fact and know you are not alone ^.^

You're right. I need to stay optimistic. Thanks!