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Yesterday
14 years ago
So, yesterday was my birthday, and it was a wretched day of misery and loneliness, just as I was expecting it to be. Partly down to it being the first time in years I was single on my birthday.
I was actually very depressed for more than a week beforehand (it's almost two weeks of depression at this point), but had started to feel a little better. Then yesterday happened, and now I'm feeling utterly horrible again, but worse than before.
I'm doing my best to try and pull myself out of this, but this is a bad depression, and its proving to not be easy...
I know I have comments and messages to reply to, and commissions that need to be worked on. Please be patient with me. I'll try and get to them as soon as I feel up to it.
Oh, and thank you to the two of you who remembered my birthday and took the time to wish my a happy birthday. I appreciate it.
That's right, aside from family, a grand total of just TWO people said happy birthday to me yesterday. Can't be sure, but that probably didn't help my mood...
Edited to add: I had actually mentioned my birthday was coming up in a journal post at the beginning of the month: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2690026/
I was actually very depressed for more than a week beforehand (it's almost two weeks of depression at this point), but had started to feel a little better. Then yesterday happened, and now I'm feeling utterly horrible again, but worse than before.
I'm doing my best to try and pull myself out of this, but this is a bad depression, and its proving to not be easy...
I know I have comments and messages to reply to, and commissions that need to be worked on. Please be patient with me. I'll try and get to them as soon as I feel up to it.
Oh, and thank you to the two of you who remembered my birthday and took the time to wish my a happy birthday. I appreciate it.
That's right, aside from family, a grand total of just TWO people said happy birthday to me yesterday. Can't be sure, but that probably didn't help my mood...
Edited to add: I had actually mentioned my birthday was coming up in a journal post at the beginning of the month: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2690026/
Happy Birthday
-gives hug-
If i would had known when your birthdays is...
I will congrat you next year for sure and hope you accept my belated best wishes for now.
*offers a hug*
...I sometimes wish FA would remind people of upcoming birthdays as some of our memories are..well..shit..
I'm sorry you had a shitty birthday... *hugs* ...that always sucks...
As for you depression. All I can say is that I suggest you go to a professional mental health provider. Depression which lasts for more than two weeks is classified as clinical depression. You may not need drugs, but you certainly need to talk to someone. You can always talk to me if you need help. :)
*gives birthday cake*
A belated happy birthday to you my friend and inspiration
Guess B-days just don't mean much to me anymore. After years of nobody but my parents to wish me anything on that day, i decided it wasn't much of a big deal and just treat it like any other day in the year. Now there's only two people left who remember i was born on a certain day in the year, my lover and brother. :(
Don't let a B-day get you down! i'm more concerned that you're single and lonely in addition to being depressed. Please cheer up... go out for a walk, exercise, do something you enjoy... just do something... don't dwell on the sad things.
*hugs tightly & nuzzles*
I know what it feels lonely and feel so alone that you crave ... implores the heavens to hear a friendly word, a voice calling him wanting to talk, to fill this loneliness, this emptiness, and yet only those who are closest to him remember and care about the fact that you were born yesterday, only the two most beloved people connect to the fact that you are a human being who feels and suffers from this loneliness ...
Believe ... I know and that's how it feels empty, devoid of purpose, so do not feel depremido longer any use for his life and comes to a head to think that nobody cares, league, or give a damn for you .. .
The pain, emptiness, are such that there is a word that set ... you just know it hurts a lot ... I know this because that's exactly what I feel ...
Believe me I have 40 years and since I entered furaffinity not received a single "Happy Birthday Man!" Neither of my supposed friends who received the jornals when I claimed to be birthday ... I was when I forgot them at the least I apologized and sent a vote of arrears of luck ...
I know exactly how painful and horrible feeling that comes after ...
But trust is not because you feel like you should give up living or give up what makes you happy ... all stages in life are ... there is a phase of enthusiasm and despair, creating the stage and the stage where we feel creatively dead, the stage where we are joy and optimism and the stage where we are "tired" of everything ... all are stages in our lives but these stages are like the seasons, they see themselves and succeed but they never stop. We must not let our hearts are right now in winter than the spring one day make it back to them and fill them with joy again, and above all he must not lose hope of that happening ...
Doi? Yes very much. But we survive. Mostly you on behalf of only two people who gave him an affectionate hug without asking for any favors nor expect any reward in return and wished him "Happy Birthday my Son that God will enlighten today ... we love you."
You still have much to live and many stories to tell so do not ever forget that you were born yesterday and made the world a little better, more humane and more beautiful.
This is the best advice I can give you ...
Yesterday - Paul Mccartney
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j82ikW8WdDc
Yesterday
All my troubles seemed so far away
Now it looks as though they're here to stay
Oh, I believe in yesterday
Suddenly
I'm not half the man I used to be
There's a shadow hanging over me
Oh, yesterday came suddenly
Why she had to go I don't know
She wouldn't say
I said something wrong now I long
For yesterday
Yesterday
Love was such an easy game to play
Now I need a place to hide away
Oh, I believe in yesterday
Why she had to go I don't know
She wouldn't say
I said something wrong now I long
For yesterday
Yesterday
Love was such an easy game to play
Now I need a place to hide away
Oh, I believe in yesterday
go do something fun!
Sorry Cyberklaw, I didn't know it was your birthday, so I will say happy birthday to make up for it and I think you should go do something fun *hugs*.
Please, accept my belated birthday wishes, and I hope you feel better!
See someone mentioned Facebook reminders in the comments, I'll prob change mine before the day as I don't want half strangers etc reminding me I'm 40
Please accept another poem
I am saddened that your depression has started to come up. You dont deserve to be drawn into this state at all. Your a talented and kind hearted guy. And i respect highly of people like you my friend.
I really do hope you come come out refreshed and at peace within. I just wish i had good advice or could help get you out of this state, but i suffer from it alot too. And even then i cant really find the right cure for it.
All i can say is, from the amountful people here, and many more that are following and supporting you, i know they are all willing to lend a helpful hand/paw/wing/claw to help you any way they can. And so will i. You have company.
You are most welcome my friend. I am actually pleased with myself that i kept it somewhere deep in my mind. I have a habit of missing the odd birthday or two.
And i hope you liked my gift. I feel its not the best of my work, but im willing to give it another go if you want me to. Thought it was quite an honour trying to make you a sort of theme song for "Julius". Heh. Let me know if you need anything changed from it.
Im sure everyone else didnt mean to miss your birthday. Like i saw with someones comment on here about over 5,000 journals?...wow...and i struggle with say 40....its hard to nail the right time too, time zones and also when people are able to be online. Many people missed mine too the last time. Heck im only now getting a commission done of my hatchday gift. And it was Feburary my hatchday!..heh...but time latency doesnt effect me. As long as there is some care in the end./ And i can see from here. So many people love to wish you a happy birthday. Heck, ive taken this long to get to this journal. Heh..i apologise for that.
Keep strong. We all make it out of the tunnel at the end. Like someone on here has also said. "Believe."