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And another year starts.
17 years ago
Well, looks like I've once again faultered in updating. *smacks self*
Anyways.
Fresh new year to start off on, hopefully for the better. 2006 was a disaster (for me anyways), 2007 was only slightly better and, here's to making a wish, 2008 will be better.
If it ain't, I'm bustin' the bat out, taking out it's kneecaps and drowning it in the lake by 2009 come. XP
Anyways, the holidays being over with, I can say it was only mildly pleasing. I got to see my brother and sister, and one of my cousins and grandma which I hadn't seen in quite a while, but at the same time had to deal with the all-too-familiar chaos that's always reigned at my parents' house. Baaaahhumbug.
On a brighter note, Ragin sent me a card and two games -- someone knows how to make a gamer happy! X3 Loving them so far, thanks again man, you're awesome. <3
Apart from that I had a small personal crisis in not knowing whether or not my landlord would let me keep my apartment, since by the time Emploi Quebec got back to me about Social Aid, I was already past the day of the month that I could be legally kicked out for not having paid rent yet. Thankfully things turned out better, and he let me pay him back the month of December at the same time as the month of January after the first check came in.
Speaking of, it seems to have paid off to get in contact with Carrefour Jeunesse. Thanks to the lady I meet with on a weekly basis there to follow up on how things are going, I got upped onto a special program that should, if nothing goes wrong, last an entire year and keep me housed and pay for my necessities while I get my act together. The meetings with the CLSC that she got me in also paid off, having led me to meeting with the Montreal General Hospital Psych department within the month (rather than being stuck in a line for half a year all over again).
Good news is they agreed to follow up on me, which should hopefully lead on to the next steps to resolving the whole GID problem. Bad news is it's going to cost me almost as much as I pay rent. Actually, 25$ less than rent, so 300$. Yeeeesh.
Ah well, it's important so I'll make due.
With the remaining money from December and January, I got in contact with MasterCard and Bell, paid off some debts, and finally got my cellphone reactivated (which I also use as my home phone), and I should be getting internet back within next week. Free actually, for three months. Had the clerk sign a paper stating it really WAS free and without contract, so I'm safe JUST IN CASE.
Artwise, I think I'm slowly improving. Sllowly. Very, very slowly.
I still haven't gotten back to colouring though, haven't been able since my last big art block. It seems so silly, even to me, that my hand just cramps up when I try... but I'll eventually get back into colouring... even if I have to bite my hand off and stick the tablet pen in the stump to do it! HEAR THAT, HAND?! Bwa.
Videogame-wise... iunno. I'm sortof bored with gaming. Usually I take this as a sign of depression, which is probably the case, but hell, at least I know about it, so I figure I'm only one step behind it. To pass time I mostly just read, draw (or try to, anyways) and play a mix of MODblivion, StarForce : Rogue Universe, Universe At War, Sims2 and X3: Reunion.
I got Unreal Tournament 3 this week, but without internet access it loses a small part of it's awesomeness. Hopefully that'll be fixed before the end of next week, and I'll be right back into the fun and fury of mass mayhem.
A lot of people have asked me why I don't just get a job already, so I figure I might as well answer :
A) I have a really, really bad problem when it comes to dealing with crowds or handling money. If it's more than a half-dozen people or 20+$, I get overly stressed, which leads to :
B) Having trouble concentrating on what I'm doing when I start getting stressed. It's a vicious cycle in which I'm so scared of screwing up that I stress myself more and more and the problem just keeps getting worse. Then shit hits the fan because I :
C) Start having panic attacks and anxiety problems when I get TOO stressed. It doesn't really take much either, they had to drag me into the back thrice when McDonald's tried sticking me on cashier position because it actually got to the point where I've fainted. Working the kitchens was fine, the only thing I had to deal with was the crazy beepers for things being ready, no crowd, no money. Just food, and a simple work routine.
Problem is, most employers want polyvalent workers these days, and since the only qualifications I have are a highschool diploma and bad comments from past bosses for having trouble working, it seems the only things I CAN get are the stress-intensive customer service jobs. x_X;
I could likely ace right through a professional course for technical comp work or something if I had the chance for it, but my parents sure aren't helping there. Hopefully later on this year I might get my shot at such a course with the help of Carrefour Jeunesse.
Anywhoot, enough ranting for me today. I'll have some new art up soon, just need to get the files uploaded.
Happy (belated) new year everyone,
And may the sands be warm under your feet.
~ Khats/Doomie
Anyways.
Fresh new year to start off on, hopefully for the better. 2006 was a disaster (for me anyways), 2007 was only slightly better and, here's to making a wish, 2008 will be better.
If it ain't, I'm bustin' the bat out, taking out it's kneecaps and drowning it in the lake by 2009 come. XP
Anyways, the holidays being over with, I can say it was only mildly pleasing. I got to see my brother and sister, and one of my cousins and grandma which I hadn't seen in quite a while, but at the same time had to deal with the all-too-familiar chaos that's always reigned at my parents' house. Baaaahhumbug.
On a brighter note, Ragin sent me a card and two games -- someone knows how to make a gamer happy! X3 Loving them so far, thanks again man, you're awesome. <3
Apart from that I had a small personal crisis in not knowing whether or not my landlord would let me keep my apartment, since by the time Emploi Quebec got back to me about Social Aid, I was already past the day of the month that I could be legally kicked out for not having paid rent yet. Thankfully things turned out better, and he let me pay him back the month of December at the same time as the month of January after the first check came in.
Speaking of, it seems to have paid off to get in contact with Carrefour Jeunesse. Thanks to the lady I meet with on a weekly basis there to follow up on how things are going, I got upped onto a special program that should, if nothing goes wrong, last an entire year and keep me housed and pay for my necessities while I get my act together. The meetings with the CLSC that she got me in also paid off, having led me to meeting with the Montreal General Hospital Psych department within the month (rather than being stuck in a line for half a year all over again).
Good news is they agreed to follow up on me, which should hopefully lead on to the next steps to resolving the whole GID problem. Bad news is it's going to cost me almost as much as I pay rent. Actually, 25$ less than rent, so 300$. Yeeeesh.
Ah well, it's important so I'll make due.
With the remaining money from December and January, I got in contact with MasterCard and Bell, paid off some debts, and finally got my cellphone reactivated (which I also use as my home phone), and I should be getting internet back within next week. Free actually, for three months. Had the clerk sign a paper stating it really WAS free and without contract, so I'm safe JUST IN CASE.
Artwise, I think I'm slowly improving. Sllowly. Very, very slowly.
I still haven't gotten back to colouring though, haven't been able since my last big art block. It seems so silly, even to me, that my hand just cramps up when I try... but I'll eventually get back into colouring... even if I have to bite my hand off and stick the tablet pen in the stump to do it! HEAR THAT, HAND?! Bwa.
Videogame-wise... iunno. I'm sortof bored with gaming. Usually I take this as a sign of depression, which is probably the case, but hell, at least I know about it, so I figure I'm only one step behind it. To pass time I mostly just read, draw (or try to, anyways) and play a mix of MODblivion, StarForce : Rogue Universe, Universe At War, Sims2 and X3: Reunion.
I got Unreal Tournament 3 this week, but without internet access it loses a small part of it's awesomeness. Hopefully that'll be fixed before the end of next week, and I'll be right back into the fun and fury of mass mayhem.
A lot of people have asked me why I don't just get a job already, so I figure I might as well answer :
A) I have a really, really bad problem when it comes to dealing with crowds or handling money. If it's more than a half-dozen people or 20+$, I get overly stressed, which leads to :
B) Having trouble concentrating on what I'm doing when I start getting stressed. It's a vicious cycle in which I'm so scared of screwing up that I stress myself more and more and the problem just keeps getting worse. Then shit hits the fan because I :
C) Start having panic attacks and anxiety problems when I get TOO stressed. It doesn't really take much either, they had to drag me into the back thrice when McDonald's tried sticking me on cashier position because it actually got to the point where I've fainted. Working the kitchens was fine, the only thing I had to deal with was the crazy beepers for things being ready, no crowd, no money. Just food, and a simple work routine.
Problem is, most employers want polyvalent workers these days, and since the only qualifications I have are a highschool diploma and bad comments from past bosses for having trouble working, it seems the only things I CAN get are the stress-intensive customer service jobs. x_X;
I could likely ace right through a professional course for technical comp work or something if I had the chance for it, but my parents sure aren't helping there. Hopefully later on this year I might get my shot at such a course with the help of Carrefour Jeunesse.
Anywhoot, enough ranting for me today. I'll have some new art up soon, just need to get the files uploaded.
Happy (belated) new year everyone,
And may the sands be warm under your feet.
~ Khats/Doomie
tl;dr
just kidding.
most of that sounds pretty awesome. hmm... just... blargh. one can only hope for the best, I suppose. money's always a bitch, don't think about it, it'll go away... till bills come. wow. I'm bad with being comforting, aren't I? O_o
weeeeeell... anywho, best wishes, and I got somethin' for ya, next time you're online.
*hugs* :3