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There's this thing called life...
14 years ago
General
(WARNING: Harsh language and ranting ahead)
And right now it sucks. So much stress, so much tension, so much anger and I just want to scream.
You ever notice how life has big fucking IF smack in the middle of it? You wanna know why? It's IF you live that you have a life. IF you die you are dead, end of your fucking fairy tale no happily ever after for you.
Dear Higher Being watching over us that some call God, how fair is it to take someone who has never done wrong and give them something that is going to kill them? They say you are fair, but it doesn't seem fair to give a death sentence to someone who has so much to live for!
Normally I'm not one to rant, or vent or let my anger out at all. Because I'm the kind of person that no matter how bad my life is, if I see someone else having a bad day I do my damnedest to cheer them up, because that how I am.
But god dammit I have been so stressed out lately and so worried about what is gonna happen in the coming years of my life, I need to vent... otherwise I may fucking explode and lash out at someone I care about.
As a good portion of you probably know from reading my mom's journals, my grandmother has been diagnosed with a cancer that is so rare and so deadly that it cannot be cured. The radiation and chemo she was supposed to have was going to slow the cancer and keep her alive longer. BUT due to the hole in her throat, thank to the cancer that was removed from her neck, she cannot eat or drink and the chemo and radiation that was supposed to help her was making the hole bigger, which is BAD. The doctors say she has a max of two months. My grandmother is a fighter, and she wants to stay alive until her birthday which is February, 7th.
Her house has to be cleaned and tensions are running high, tempers are flaring and anger is being thrown around. SO needless to say right now my life is a goddamn roller-coaster ride whose tracks are squeaky, old and about to break. Yee-fucking-haw.
Fuck You Very Much Life, Fuck You Very Much.
And for those of you who actually read this whole damn thing, thank you. However, since I'm so stressed I really don't want you sympathy, stories or even deign to tell me that your life is worse right now. No... no... I don't want to hear it. You wanna know why? Because I'm going to loose two grandparents soon. One from cancer and the other a broken heart.
The only thing I will except is you thinking of my grandma, praying for her, and maybe some hugs. Otherwise... please... please... don't bother commenting. My life sucks and my stress is high and I don't want to lash out at you.
I'm sorry if any of this sounds harsh... but I did warn you.
And right now it sucks. So much stress, so much tension, so much anger and I just want to scream.
You ever notice how life has big fucking IF smack in the middle of it? You wanna know why? It's IF you live that you have a life. IF you die you are dead, end of your fucking fairy tale no happily ever after for you.
Dear Higher Being watching over us that some call God, how fair is it to take someone who has never done wrong and give them something that is going to kill them? They say you are fair, but it doesn't seem fair to give a death sentence to someone who has so much to live for!
Normally I'm not one to rant, or vent or let my anger out at all. Because I'm the kind of person that no matter how bad my life is, if I see someone else having a bad day I do my damnedest to cheer them up, because that how I am.
But god dammit I have been so stressed out lately and so worried about what is gonna happen in the coming years of my life, I need to vent... otherwise I may fucking explode and lash out at someone I care about.
As a good portion of you probably know from reading my mom's journals, my grandmother has been diagnosed with a cancer that is so rare and so deadly that it cannot be cured. The radiation and chemo she was supposed to have was going to slow the cancer and keep her alive longer. BUT due to the hole in her throat, thank to the cancer that was removed from her neck, she cannot eat or drink and the chemo and radiation that was supposed to help her was making the hole bigger, which is BAD. The doctors say she has a max of two months. My grandmother is a fighter, and she wants to stay alive until her birthday which is February, 7th.
Her house has to be cleaned and tensions are running high, tempers are flaring and anger is being thrown around. SO needless to say right now my life is a goddamn roller-coaster ride whose tracks are squeaky, old and about to break. Yee-fucking-haw.
Fuck You Very Much Life, Fuck You Very Much.
And for those of you who actually read this whole damn thing, thank you. However, since I'm so stressed I really don't want you sympathy, stories or even deign to tell me that your life is worse right now. No... no... I don't want to hear it. You wanna know why? Because I'm going to loose two grandparents soon. One from cancer and the other a broken heart.
The only thing I will except is you thinking of my grandma, praying for her, and maybe some hugs. Otherwise... please... please... don't bother commenting. My life sucks and my stress is high and I don't want to lash out at you.
I'm sorry if any of this sounds harsh... but I did warn you.
leftfurdead
I understand what you are going through, alright? I lost my grandfather to severe cancer, coupled with Liver Failure. Also lost my Aunt (Died at 40. x.x) to rare lung cancer. So yeah, I know what you are going through and if you need me, you have someone to talk to.
I'm sorry to hear that your grandmother isn't doing well. I truly am. But if nothing else, I do hope we are friends, and no matter how good or bad two people get along, if they are friends, or if they really care for one another in any way, shape, or form, they will be there for them in the best way they can manage.
So yeah. If you need someone to talk to, ever, you can talk to me.