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Being fat is cool or it sucks?
14 years ago
Welcome to Bo-san's Journal! =D Being fat for me was always something considered a problem. I remember that when I was about 20 kilos fatter, life was terrible for me. I had this big problem of seeing myself fat and until nowadays I can't stand looking at my own belly.
But, I start to think of why I think this way and I also what is considered "hot". Why don't we try looking for "hot stud" on Google images and see what we find? Well, I think much of you got boners and are going to continue (or not ) reading this after some good fapping time, right?....Well, welcome back! How was it? x3 heheheh Joking joking. Well, I guess that feeling attracted to these kind of males is considered "normal". But on Wikipedia, having a preference for overweight people and older people, for example, is considered a paraphilia.
So, it means that "hot studs" are the healthy things to be sexually appreciated, while the overweight, "bears" and "daddies" are considered a sexual and mental disturbance. I am a bit overweight and hairy, so it means that those who find me hot are sick people? I mean, those who didn't find their ideal of hot men on Google image should all look for a mental house?
I remember a guy here on FA that was highly criticised for being a "gainer". I wonder if people were really caring about the health side. Aren't some of them just telling him indirectly to stop being fat because it's ugly and he should be a hot stud like the guys on Google images?
What pains me is the fact that I can't stop thinking that a fat me is an ugly me. Although, I really don't mind an ugly you, a chubby you is an adorable, cute you that deserve lots of hugs! But a chubby me is unacceptable. It's one of those thoughts that you'd rather not having them, but because of the common thought that made true the images of "hot studs" on google images, I ended up accepting it, as much of general people do. I mean, why would most of our fursonas be huge, muscular, fatless bulls or dragons with sexy grins and huge dicks if we didn't accept this trend?
Well, it's just something that was in my head.
And you? What kind of body are you attracted to? Are you "normal" or "paraphiliac"?
Peace!
PS: Can someone tell me how to efficiently burn abdominal fat? x3
But, I start to think of why I think this way and I also what is considered "hot". Why don't we try looking for "hot stud" on Google images and see what we find? Well, I think much of you got boners and are going to continue (or not ) reading this after some good fapping time, right?....Well, welcome back! How was it? x3 heheheh Joking joking. Well, I guess that feeling attracted to these kind of males is considered "normal". But on Wikipedia, having a preference for overweight people and older people, for example, is considered a paraphilia.
So, it means that "hot studs" are the healthy things to be sexually appreciated, while the overweight, "bears" and "daddies" are considered a sexual and mental disturbance. I am a bit overweight and hairy, so it means that those who find me hot are sick people? I mean, those who didn't find their ideal of hot men on Google image should all look for a mental house?
I remember a guy here on FA that was highly criticised for being a "gainer". I wonder if people were really caring about the health side. Aren't some of them just telling him indirectly to stop being fat because it's ugly and he should be a hot stud like the guys on Google images?
What pains me is the fact that I can't stop thinking that a fat me is an ugly me. Although, I really don't mind an ugly you, a chubby you is an adorable, cute you that deserve lots of hugs! But a chubby me is unacceptable. It's one of those thoughts that you'd rather not having them, but because of the common thought that made true the images of "hot studs" on google images, I ended up accepting it, as much of general people do. I mean, why would most of our fursonas be huge, muscular, fatless bulls or dragons with sexy grins and huge dicks if we didn't accept this trend?
Well, it's just something that was in my head.
And you? What kind of body are you attracted to? Are you "normal" or "paraphiliac"?
Peace!
PS: Can someone tell me how to efficiently burn abdominal fat? x3
I feel attracted to muscular and chubby body types, as long as it's not too muscular or too chubby, it's fine.
The stetycal steriotype of a "man" comes from the classical world, from those over-fit unreal men sculptures. That's all. After the Romantic revolution it started to change a little, but it's still the main stetic goal: thin, kinda muscular men.
You don't have to be affraid of not being sexy. Sexyness on a man is realtive with it's personality. For me, at least. I can find a chubby guy the sexiest thing in the world if he treats me well and I find him an interesting person. I think women have a bigger problem on this area, but nevermind.
ps: sucky English is sucky
I like different body types as long as they dont go extremes. Yes, that probably sounds shallow, but too much fat or muscle is a turn off :P
Such is why I am okay with guys that want to lose weight for health reasons. Conversely, I am NOT into gainers/feeders.
I used to be extremely heavy and hated it. Not because of how I looked per se, but because I didn't like how I felt and I knew it was very unhealthy. So, that's what prompted me to work on the problem. I have dropped from 140kg to 74kg and feel so much better in every respect - emotionally, physically, you name it.
For the record, I actually had more compliments on my appearance when I was a little bit heavier. (From women. On the other hand, men seem to like the trimmer look. :P )
I find beauty in fat or skinny men and women...who are into piercings, tattoo's and rockin music. * raises glass* You're into what you're into, mate.
I'm certainly attracted more to average to a bit chubbier. :3
As for fat? Diet is the best way. And not just going on a diet and going off it when you've lost the weight, you have to change your diet and keep with it. Sodas, sweets... those have to be cut out or a sometimes food. :l It sucks but it works! I've lost about 30 pounds from that an exercise.
I'm like...REALLY underweight, by the way.
I should lose some weight, but I can't keep a diet or an exercise schedule to save my life. XD
chubby hubby ftw
now... as far as I'm concerned I like more the hunk look of a male, but I never been with any hunk and I was happy...
No matter what other thinks is hot, sexy, normal or whatever, the only thing that it matter its your own opinion.
You think your chubbi tummy its ugly, thats because of the social thought of "thats hot and that not", you are a victim of that, accept yourself, if you wanna be more healthy its ok, but not because of other´s opinion.
anyway... if someone feels good with his/her body, all will be okay... but.. don't kill yourself with alcohol, drugs, smoke, very fat food everyday... or any exercise... ^^ please take care about health.
Sorry to burst people's bubbles about how all fat people are supposed to be "jolly," but I, personally. can't stand being fat.
My opinion from life lessons; your mileage may vary.
Let me just say i like being soft than hard or as my friend refers to them *as hard as sleeping on rocks*. Im attracted to those with personality i like, not appearance. Appearance doens`t matter to me because it changes throughout life unlike personality. Lets just say majority of the people are picky on who they choose to be their mates and others settle for what they got. Love will come its way to the eye of the beholder. enough bout me.
People have different taste in others. some like them fat, some like them muscular. But fact still stands that those who are picky never find the right one to find them attractive. What im saying is that just because of appearance, people judge others and rate them by their attractiveness just by that one look without really knowing who or how that person is. Thats why you see people with so many ex-boy/girl-friends, because they are either picky or because they are unappealing to one another.
To me beau, you`re just a lovable guy. No one really hates you or judges you on how you look. you are just a pure pack of fun and silly acts. We love you for who you are, not by how you look. ^_^
and sorry for the lengthy comment o_____o can`t really notice the length of it when typing on a DSI...
From an attractiveness point of view, I like round tummys and tight tummys, but when its hangs and swings I get a little worried...
I only say this as speculation, not actual fact. But that's what it seems like.
you know who who those stuff are intended for? women and feminime gay people
when sy is way too slim, that's a health disorder too and in a male, i find it disguisting, because they look like girls
too much fat is also a problem
having a bit bigger tummy is the perfect thing
the reason why you see those 35 comments is that most ppl here are not girls and/or don't like them
being slim like a stick is feminime disorder
gay ppl like to hug, cuddle and stuff, that's why they like furries and tummies =o3
They would have done the same thing if he were intentionally losing weight and anorexic. Both extremes are unhealthy and seen as unattractive by many people but I doubt it was because he was overweight and they thought it was 'ugly' as much as it's not a good idea to eat yourself into obesity. That's what gainer culture is generally into.
As long as you're being healthy I don't mind. Different strokes for different folks. Media does seem to push for an ideal type of body which is unfair but not everyone subscribes to that.
Being thin doesn't mean you're anymore healthy than someone who is bigger. There are many unhealthy skinny people who think they can eat whatever they want just because they have a fast metabolism. Funnily enough, a lot of professional bodybuilding tends to be really unhealthy due to all the ridiculous steroids they take and all the starvation when it comes time to cut. It is definitely not the healthier side of weightlifting but I'm not all that sure people know the difference between bodybuilding and other types of weightlifting. That said, natural bodybuilding tends to be healthier.
I lift weights because I want to look a certain way and because I want to be strong. I don't do it for anyone else but myself and for my own health and that's what I really think things should be about.
Being healthy comes in all shapes and sizes. If you're going to change something about your body I think it ought to be a healthy choice, whether it is to put on weight or to lose it. In the end there's always at least someone out there who will be attracted to you in some shape or form anyhow. You have to make peace with yourself.
You can't do spot reduction on body fat, it doesn't quite work like that, you'll have to lose body fat overall to see a difference which means cardio and cutting things from your diet. If you're eating an excess calorie intake, then take down about 200-500 from your maintenance. If you're drinking pop then decrease your consumption until you stop completely. Excess sugars are bad in general. Most body fat can be lost by simply eating right as you spend more time eating than in the gym but simple cardio like walking, biking, swimming or running can help. Weightlifting is generally a good idea as well.
Keep in mind this sort of thing is a lifestyle change, which is why many people fail to achieve their goals. You need to have the right information and the right mindset going into it.
I remember when I was 12, and my friends mom was talking about some pedophile on the news. She went on saying that pedophilia was a "disease" and that medicine can fix it. Now while I am completely against pedophilia, I don't think what she said about it being a physical sickness was true at all.
I can understand why people attracted to torturous and potentially dangerous things is considered wrong, but when it comes to being attracted to heavier people or something harmless like that, no one has a right to decide weather it's wrong or not, and no one should judge people based on that. -_-
I personally can't stand scrawny,pale, or hairless guys. I prefer my guys to be more muscular/heavier set.
Our world is one that is driven by the physical. As much as we try to fool ourselves about emotions, intellect, and spirit being what makes someone attractive to us, it's not entirely true. At least not right away. It certainly adds to our feeling toward each other, but in all honesty we look first. Looking and seeing are at the forefront of our minds, especially here on FA, an art driven community. But the way I see it, is that one simply has to put forward in looks to what you hold inside. Ok, maybe simply wasn't the best word choice. Being that open is hard. But we of all people should realize that people judge by what they see, even before they hear or feel anything from us. Portray on the outside, what it is you feel on the inside. Something of which, I just realized, is a bit easier for this community to wrap their head around... duh! fursuits! But even when you aren't wearing your suits, if you have one. To which I say: Hurry up and develop gene manipulation so that I don't have to but a fursuit to look and feel like a panda!!!!
Anyways...
I like my boys big, but I have been known to fall for a chaser from time to time. But I also don't much like guys who are super duper fat and chubby. But that in of itself is just a reflection of my inner self. I feel big and strong, stronger than I really am at times. And at times, I feel small, like child size and easily fit into another's arms. That there depends upon many factors, emotional state, what I'm currently thinking of, surrounding, and sometimes even how surreal, or normal things seem around me.
And I'm thinking I should end here. Could go off on far too many tangents, and somehow end up discussing fading teen pop music idols and why my coworker is so weird, yet still cooler than most people I work with. <--- See! Tangent!
still, gaining is something which i really would hope fewer people do. it IS a massive health risk to gain so much weight in such a short time that they actually are risking damage to themselves. (though, past that i really don't care... if they want to live a life that's going to end with something like heart disease, diabetes or other organ failures, that's their choice. i'm quite darwinistic in that sense.)
look, since the ancient times, muscles are a sign of activity, if you don't have muscles you're sedentary, and since the ancient times had no place for sedentarism... take your own conclusions.
muscles rock not because they are cute or whatever, but because of what they mean, if it weren't for steroids, muscle would be only gained by dedication and will power, means you shaped your body with the power of your mind, how cool does that sound?
meanwhile, fat is normally related to lazyness and whatever, hair excess is related to lack of hygeiene, if you were to take this to the super extreme side, you would say that you're hard because of a sewer-dirty...something... either way, see how this doesn't sound cool?
anyway, media try push on us what pleases the masses, it pushes THEIR WORLD on us, then it comes problems with self image and whatever, but it's the old rule "if you want something, go after it. if you give up, that means it wasn't important"
ps: abdominal fat is basically where your extra-fat resides, exercises in general are the secret to burn it, aerobics like running or ball sports can take care of this.
take care.
I actually think it's good for society to put pressure on overweight/obese people and to disapprove of their lifestyle, the same way there's pressure against heavy smokers and drunkards. The obesity epidemic is one of the things driving up healthcare costs, and I don't like sharing a society with people who expect insurance companies, the healthcare system, or society to bear the burden of their irresponsible habits and lack of discipline. If you're fat and trying to improve yourself, good on you keep at it. Feel free to ask me for advice, since I used to be fat and very unfit myself a long time ago, and it took a lot of effort to change, but it worked out.
That being said, I think we should have the right to eat, drink, or smoke whatever we want, but moderation and personal discipline is everything. I eat lots, drink beer, and occasionally smoke, but I hit the weights 5 days a week, and run at least 3 times a week... And do pushups/pullups every hour when I'm at home.
Also, I know many people just have a husky/thick body type due to genetics. That's totally fine; I know dudes who have a bit of a "keg" belly and can run 3 miles in 18 minutes, do 20 pullups, and are all around fitness studs. They just don't LOOK like it, but really, appearance doesn't matter if you can accomplish the task. Some people, no matter how hard they work out, still keep some extra padding due to genetics, but they're still strong and fast like nobody's business. There is such a thing as healthy levels of fat.
(previous comment hidden by me due to giant typo)
I totally agree. There is such a thing as being completely healthy and fit, but still having a belly. It's better to be healthy in any case.
Its not an easy thing to change.. I still go to food when I am most distressed, and its almost impossible for me to diet. I am getting better though, consuming less, having more 'diet' options. And I do know some people who find me sexy, though I have not had a relationship in many years due in part to my discomfort and low selfesteme which are in part linked to me being fat.
Even still, I am fat and I accept myself as such and do what I can. When I draw my fursona, I draw myself plump, using my real body as reference. I try to make myself look sexy and handsome, which is possible, both on paper and in the real world, but it just takes more effort. Still, I know the stigma that comes from being overweight, and how many still look down upon it, and this is one of the reasons I keep myself in check when it comes to ever thinking about dating.
This might not be exactly what you wanted, but this is what your journal made me think of.
=^.,.^=
As far as society's reactions.... Being overweight can further complicate health problems, so I guess in a way it's healthy for the world if the population aspires to be fit. But it does go a little out of control at times. It sucks when bullying or other vicious acts are aimed at someone because of their weight. Really, instead of belittling these individuals, we should be doing active things with our bigger friends/acquaintances instead of poking fun at them. After all, you can be overweight and healthy, and genetic diversity is the key to success! For instance it's been theorized that some individuals are genetically predisposed to store fat more easily, especially with convenient, unhealthy foods in today's world. However, if some crazy event happened that caused the planet to become colder on average, maybe these individuals would make it through the harsher conditions more easily than others?
Beau, as for your internal conflicts over your weight, I'd say that you should aim for a healthy body type that you enjoy. That doesn't mean losing the belly necessarily. Do some cardio to keep your heart healthy, lift some weights to thicken up if you like, but focus these actions on your goals, not someone else's coveted image. Anyone that's worth your time in friendship or love is not going to focus on the physical aspects to the point where they think you're disgusting due to a li'l tummy.
However if you got like $2K-$5K cash, there are alternatives to liposuction to remove small amounts of fat from specific body parts. Those can use either cryongenics, or chemical injected locally, etc. to target the fat and force the body to evacuate it over a course of a few weeks.
Otherwise, if you look at food labels, even for "healthy" stuff like soups salads etc. you'll notice trends in calories. Most prepared foods will shove calories in you via sugars, oils or cheese. You need to find foods you like that are low calories so that you can eat a normal filling volume of food without shoving thousands of calories in your body. Reduce fat and processed sugars. For salads, use dressing for flavoring, not for soaking every leaf with a layer of oil. When getting veggies, go for tastier steamed ones instead of pan sauteed in oil. When getting starches, avoid the toppings of cheese or heavy sauces, especially if they are sweet.
Most people are obese in the US because of the lack of semi decent food intake. Subsidies and economics have driven calorie rich foods on the tables of the poorest layers of society. Soft drinks and snacking habits compound the issue. We eat way too much meat (4oz per meal is already a lot), and too much sugars and fats. Restaurants don't know how to serve good veggies.
For me personally, I could stand to lose 50 lbs and I'd be happy lol.
What makes me angry is that it makes those conscious about their body type or whatever is suddenly feel "ugly" and "out of place" and negative all because "I don't like it, therefore you shouldn't either" type attitude the world seems to have.
Which is also why I have such a "screw you, I'm not living your life so let me live mine" attitude.
orz I guess I'm sick.
I've been told the best way to lose fat is not just through diet alone, but putting calories to good use with exercise, and/or building muscle, I plan to get a gym membership soon. But I mean even if I got a nice set of abs, if I liked some one and they were fat, I wouldn't let that ruin a relationship for me. Personally I find a bit of fat more attractive on girls or guys than some one who is underweight.
Although I do admit, too much fat does bother me, once they start to get into being overweight by 125-150 pounds (depending on their height), I get a bit put off. They are not ugly, per say, I just don't wanna be crashed in bed. XD
I am in the military so I can't get overweight, but compared to some of the other females, I am not as muscular as I would like but I am trying.
I am not sure I like muscular men but I do go out with them, sometimes...it is just that their egos get in the way & I get tired of watching them looking at their own reflection, flexing.
I have never gone out with a chubby guy. I mean, yes on dates but nothing steady.
I hear good things like they are attentive & funny.... but I also hear the words, lazy & sloppy. I don't know who to believe but I hear that & it makes me think twice.
I have guy-pals who are chubby & are great to hang out with & when we are overseas, they are the first to hit the gym & work out with. They lose weight & gain muscle & are fun to hang & do activities with.
I even get jealous on how good they look on such a short time...until we get back. then it is beer & pizza & pot... & NO gym...then I feel like I lost the best work out buddy.
I wouldn't mind going out with a chubby guy I guess... depends on the cute level...I mean I think Jack Black is cute & so is Seth Rogen... but as long as they are outgoing & would like to go on hikes & long EASY runs... Someone who would hang out with...OUTDOORS...the beach, the park, the hills....! but I haven't heard of any chubby guys who would like to do that.
I also, for some reason, LOVE big guts. Not tubby, jelly-roll types (not that there's something wrong with them, just not my thing), but more the round, "ball-gut" type. So hot.
That ultimate holy grail, though, is the ever so rare guy that is a combination of both. Big muscley shoulders and arms, strong chest, and a nice round gut underneath. Insta-boner. Too bad they're so rare...
I'm kind of a big guy myself, 6'4", ~260, but sadly not as much muscle as I'd like yet. Working on it, though.
In a non-sexual sense, I love fat people. What's not to love? I've had a lot of friends that were pretty big, they're adorable, cuddly. Is it a turn on? Not really. Is it ugly? Fuck no.
Thats kinda a bullshit way of thinking. Whats normal? Everyone has their likes and dislikes and everyone thinks the other is bad just because they dont like it. I'm proud to like bears because I am one, doesnt mean I dont like a muscular guy or a thin one either. Looks shouldnt matter, if you have a preference then ok but I still thing you should look into personality.
If your a bear, people call you fatass, if your skinny people call you flamboyant. People are people, and most people are ignorant. You have to respect others peoples choices in their own lives.
I prefer to be abnormal anyways, who cares about what people think of me. Not like I'm gonna see them everyday.
Put simply (it's a long story), I'm neither "normal" nor "paraphilic". I'm a romantic asexual, meaning I can still fall in love with people, but I have little or no attraction towards either gender.
Nowhere (that I can see) on the wikipedia article does it mention that paraphilia is an attraction to the "abnormal", it's more like an attraction to the "dangerous abnormal", if you know what I mean, so stuff like sadism, pedophilia, etc; not "bears" or the like. I think wikipedia defines it more as a "dangerous" kind of fetish or sexual attraction (from what I've read of it, so I could be wrong).
Regardless, sexual attraction is generally insignificant, the real thing that matters is how one loves and is loved. For example, pedophilia is bad, because children generally won't be "experienced" or developed enough in matters of love/sexuality, they're generally naive, and they generally won't be consenting either; of course, there is the matter of thinking a child is attractive is "sick" (I agree), but that matter is subjective, whereas my previous point regarding pedophilia is objective.
So there's a reason certain sexualities/attractions are viewed as "bad". An attraction to hairiness, fat, etc, is generally not considered to be "bad", but one may think the one attracted to said things has bad taste.
You should remember to take into account that all views should be classified into "subjective" and "objective" categories. As such, don't frown upon yourself so harshly for being somewhat chubby/hairy/whatever. If you were obese to the point of obscenity, then that's a different story, as it's a health risk.
Personally, I have a mix of feminine and manly traits. I have huge eye-lashes, I sound like a girl, and my hair is rather pretty-boy-ish. On the other hand, I can become rather hairy, in which case I merely shave off everything since I prefer a feminine look. However, there isn't anything "wrong" with me being hairy, there are no sexual or health related risks, I just don't like it. So - in your case - if you don't like being somewhat chubby/hairy/whatever, do what is necessary to change it, but do it because YOU want to do it.
As for the whole "fursona" thing... well, I don't really like the idea of it (believe it or not, I'm not really that much of a fan of furries (generally)), but I think it's rather shallow how most fursonas are "huge, muscular, fatless bulls or dragons with sexy grins and huge dicks".
As for burning abdominal fat, I'm afraid I've little info on that, but obvious tips include:
- Do abdominal exercises.
- Eat healthy.
... I don't know, that kind of stuff.