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14 years ago
So my life..
Right now my life is incredibly boring now a days. I've overworked my right so that had to be put on on medication to hopefully help it, it's now giving him complications in a way that I can't do my school properly, I'm sleepy as hell all the time, I can barely use my right arm cause of the pain it's giving me to use it and I have stuff that need to be turned in, which of course is shit when I have to type a lot in a report.. sigh..
Two days ago I became single.. woo..? or something I don't really know, I was pretty happy with what I had and was okay with the break up, but it just feels weird, we broke up as friends so no harm done really, and it's better to live on not thinking about any bad things that might have come out of this. I don't really think I'll be looking for a relationship any time as I don't find myself fit for a relationship, I'm not caring enough for it to be good for anyone and I'm not good with clingy people, I need a lot of space and time to myself really. Still I miss someone to just lay in a bed with, watching a movie, snuggle up with and relax.
Besides all that stuff I feel like I need to do something with my life, I just don't know what. From my point of view I'm not really good at anything, I can play computer games at a mediocre level, so it's not like I'll make anything big in eSport, so I'm not really gonna try. I want to find something I'm good at but it just seem like there is nothing for me at the moment and thats kinda just making me sad.
So I've been thinking a tad bit about death, if I would be missed, I know I would be missed by a lot of people, but I wouldn't have a problem dying. No this is not my way of saying I'm going to be taking my own life, I won't. I just wanna be something that someone can look up to and say: "Waow I wanna be like that guy!" But alas, no it's not gonna be like that I'm afraid. I wanna enjoy my life as it is but thats quite hard when there is all these problems that I've mentioned above on my mind really.
For now I'm just gonna try to finish the school I'm in, at least passing everything so I can say that I have done that, afterwards? I don't know, I really really don't know what I'm gonna with my life, I wish I knew.. I wish I had something to look forward to in my future, but right now it's all just gray.
Right now my life is incredibly boring now a days. I've overworked my right so that had to be put on on medication to hopefully help it, it's now giving him complications in a way that I can't do my school properly, I'm sleepy as hell all the time, I can barely use my right arm cause of the pain it's giving me to use it and I have stuff that need to be turned in, which of course is shit when I have to type a lot in a report.. sigh..
Two days ago I became single.. woo..? or something I don't really know, I was pretty happy with what I had and was okay with the break up, but it just feels weird, we broke up as friends so no harm done really, and it's better to live on not thinking about any bad things that might have come out of this. I don't really think I'll be looking for a relationship any time as I don't find myself fit for a relationship, I'm not caring enough for it to be good for anyone and I'm not good with clingy people, I need a lot of space and time to myself really. Still I miss someone to just lay in a bed with, watching a movie, snuggle up with and relax.
Besides all that stuff I feel like I need to do something with my life, I just don't know what. From my point of view I'm not really good at anything, I can play computer games at a mediocre level, so it's not like I'll make anything big in eSport, so I'm not really gonna try. I want to find something I'm good at but it just seem like there is nothing for me at the moment and thats kinda just making me sad.
So I've been thinking a tad bit about death, if I would be missed, I know I would be missed by a lot of people, but I wouldn't have a problem dying. No this is not my way of saying I'm going to be taking my own life, I won't. I just wanna be something that someone can look up to and say: "Waow I wanna be like that guy!" But alas, no it's not gonna be like that I'm afraid. I wanna enjoy my life as it is but thats quite hard when there is all these problems that I've mentioned above on my mind really.
For now I'm just gonna try to finish the school I'm in, at least passing everything so I can say that I have done that, afterwards? I don't know, I really really don't know what I'm gonna with my life, I wish I knew.. I wish I had something to look forward to in my future, but right now it's all just gray.
Neomi
~neomi
Hugs youtightly* i luv you Duce <3 dont worry im here for you no matter what!
Kimin
~kimin
There's no easy way to put it, there never is. The only way you're gonna get on with your life is to sit down and think hard upon what you wanna do. It might not be making games, it might as well be sowing or fishing, i don't know but keep one thing in mind: Nothing Comes Easily. By now i'd expected you to stop reading this comment but i'd wanna get this message across. Believe me i can relate to your breakup but there's no harm done right? And i don't think trying to play as a professional gamer will get you anywhere, at least now in denmark. Like i said the only thing you can do now is sit down and think about your future, nothing is lost, you're still in 2G and alot of people feels that way you do right now. This is what College is all about, figuring out what you wanna do for the rest of your life. I hope i was at least to some help.
