FA+
Shop
OH SHI-rnobyl of my life. :)
14 years ago
MOOD HAZARD AHEAD!Leave this page immediately! You've been warned.
What follows next is a description of tragic unusual and noticeable moment in my relationship with a certain person. You don't have to give a shit about that at all. There is plenty of it already. Trust me.
I am experiencing permanent troubles at initiating and supporting pointless and baseless conversations. And that's why I am not the first person you would like to talk with. I am not in even in top 100 I think. I knew that could be troublesome in some situations. And this situation was present for almost a whole year.
What I'm talking about - is my girlfriend. I am happy that I've had a chance to draw someone's attention in first place and keep it as long as almost a whole year. That is fantastic job considering the fact that our personalities correlate very weakly. When it comes to personalities - I also have problems with deep insight of one's nature. I cannot see past the outer presentation of a person unlike my colleague at work. I'm so naive that I think all people are good, honest, etc. And this lack of deep insight, blind and strong attraction to beloved ones and my patience turned out to be quite an explosive combo.
As of me - I tend to be the terminating point in great flow of shit. When it pours on me I tend to contain it within and prevent those who surround me from getting a load of it all over. After receiving a load of it myself - I then should be left alone to cool it down and reprocess it to a safer substance. And after a while everything becomes normal.
But not this time, folks. Here and now you, my dear reader, If you dared to read this far - you witness the disaster of containment rupture and personally you got shitted all over, my friend. You were warned to not come any closer, but you disobeyed. And look what happened.
It wasn't a very good time recently. My GF found a friend in that game League of Legends. And told me that he is such a great person to talk with and she feels wonderful when talking to him. I was very happy for her while barely containing that crazy boiling shit inside of me. OK. Whew... shit contained successfully. Life goes on. Another accident - she tells me I don't love her and talk with her coldly. Exactly! This is obvious! The facts that I'm:
- in hurry to/from my work just to get online and be with her;
- listening to these complaints about how much problems she has and really trying to help and advice her (often not really successfully though);
- trying to keep her entertained as hard as I can;
THESE JUST DON'T COUNT!! Oops! O_O here goes another intensive shit fluctuation. Containment works again for her sake.
There were many other insulting moments like this.
And finally today I'm having a tiny 20 minutes long meeting at work. When I came back to my workstation - there was a message like "11:10 - are you busy?" and then "11:22 - are you ignoring me?". I responded that I had a meeting so I was away. I'm a sysadmin afterall. And if something fucks up in server room - I'm going away for a long time. Thats my job. And then it goes:
She: Hey, I'm bored. Whatchya doin'?
Me: Nothing. Not much happening around here.
She: *lists problems currently upon her*
Me: Sorry to hear about that.
*PAUSE*
*Me went away for a lunchbreak*
She: *more problems*
She: Are you there?
*I'm back from lunch*
Me: I'm here now. Was at lunch. Sorry )
She: You are ignoring me for the whole day. Sergey usually tells me if he is leaving. And you are not!
Me *GETTING EDGY*
Me: Well, EX-CU-SE-ME, madam!
*PAUSE*
She: Well, you have nothing to talk about as usual, right?
Me: Exactly, maybe you have something?
She: I always have something, but what's the point if I get a silence in reply.OMFG!!!! Take cover!!! Save Your Lives!! Shitlear chain reaction commencing !!!!NOW!!!!
Massive explosion! Containment bursted to pieces. Vessel and containment debris covered in shit shoot in every direction. It's a shit meltdown! Everyone around are buried in shit and dead! *HAPPY END*
This tragedic little personal shitty Chernobyl is dated 2011-12-14 14:50:14.
P.S. Consider this as a sticky note. Just to remember. It happens pretty rarely with me. :)
And by the way: I feel fine already. No need to compassionate very much
Another funny thing: Written it while listening to The Prodigy - Girls
What follows next is a description of tragic unusual and noticeable moment in my relationship with a certain person. You don't have to give a shit about that at all. There is plenty of it already. Trust me.
I am experiencing permanent troubles at initiating and supporting pointless and baseless conversations. And that's why I am not the first person you would like to talk with. I am not in even in top 100 I think. I knew that could be troublesome in some situations. And this situation was present for almost a whole year.
What I'm talking about - is my girlfriend. I am happy that I've had a chance to draw someone's attention in first place and keep it as long as almost a whole year. That is fantastic job considering the fact that our personalities correlate very weakly. When it comes to personalities - I also have problems with deep insight of one's nature. I cannot see past the outer presentation of a person unlike my colleague at work. I'm so naive that I think all people are good, honest, etc. And this lack of deep insight, blind and strong attraction to beloved ones and my patience turned out to be quite an explosive combo.
As of me - I tend to be the terminating point in great flow of shit. When it pours on me I tend to contain it within and prevent those who surround me from getting a load of it all over. After receiving a load of it myself - I then should be left alone to cool it down and reprocess it to a safer substance. And after a while everything becomes normal.
But not this time, folks. Here and now you, my dear reader, If you dared to read this far - you witness the disaster of containment rupture and personally you got shitted all over, my friend. You were warned to not come any closer, but you disobeyed. And look what happened.
It wasn't a very good time recently. My GF found a friend in that game League of Legends. And told me that he is such a great person to talk with and she feels wonderful when talking to him. I was very happy for her while barely containing that crazy boiling shit inside of me. OK. Whew... shit contained successfully. Life goes on. Another accident - she tells me I don't love her and talk with her coldly. Exactly! This is obvious! The facts that I'm:
- in hurry to/from my work just to get online and be with her;
- listening to these complaints about how much problems she has and really trying to help and advice her (often not really successfully though);
- trying to keep her entertained as hard as I can;
THESE JUST DON'T COUNT!! Oops! O_O here goes another intensive shit fluctuation. Containment works again for her sake.
There were many other insulting moments like this.
And finally today I'm having a tiny 20 minutes long meeting at work. When I came back to my workstation - there was a message like "11:10 - are you busy?" and then "11:22 - are you ignoring me?". I responded that I had a meeting so I was away. I'm a sysadmin afterall. And if something fucks up in server room - I'm going away for a long time. Thats my job. And then it goes:
She: Hey, I'm bored. Whatchya doin'?
Me: Nothing. Not much happening around here.
She: *lists problems currently upon her*
Me: Sorry to hear about that.
*PAUSE*
*Me went away for a lunchbreak*
She: *more problems*
She: Are you there?
*I'm back from lunch*
Me: I'm here now. Was at lunch. Sorry )
She: You are ignoring me for the whole day. Sergey usually tells me if he is leaving. And you are not!
Me *GETTING EDGY*
Me: Well, EX-CU-SE-ME, madam!
*PAUSE*
She: Well, you have nothing to talk about as usual, right?
Me: Exactly, maybe you have something?
She: I always have something, but what's the point if I get a silence in reply.OMFG!!!! Take cover!!! Save Your Lives!! Shitlear chain reaction commencing !!!!NOW!!!!
Massive explosion! Containment bursted to pieces. Vessel and containment debris covered in shit shoot in every direction. It's a shit meltdown! Everyone around are buried in shit and dead! *HAPPY END*
This tragedic little personal shitty Chernobyl is dated 2011-12-14 14:50:14.
P.S. Consider this as a sticky note. Just to remember. It happens pretty rarely with me. :)
And by the way: I feel fine already. No need to compassionate very much
Another funny thing: Written it while listening to The Prodigy - Girls
I should have said i am sorry that you are sad.
Anyway I thank you again for being responsive to problems of others. You are awesome because of that! :) Merry Christmas to you, Stu!
Knowing this though, doesn't make it any easier to cope with, sadly.
I understand where your coming from though. I do the same thing. Just bottle shit up for the sake of keeping the peace, and not wanting to dump on loved ones....but man, when it explodes.....never pretty. But I've been with the same woman for about 7 years now....rules for success? She keeps her standards low (very low, obviously), and I just keep alot of my shit to myself. Not that I don't trust her, just I'm too much of a wuss to speak up, and deal with shit. I just take it all out in my music, and the rest I just wait patiently for it to just 'go away'.
I should mention taking advice from me is probably not a good idea.
Women are could be weird. But still they are nice creatures the way they are. And in fact this is life - nobody told anyone that it would be that easy. It's gotta have some hard quests or else it would be very boring.
I would like to give you congratulations on staying along with your woman for so long. I think both in couple should compromise something to stay together. I honestly tried that. I closed my eyes on many not so pleasant things. She is a very active girl and while I'm fat, lazy and boring like dryed shit. Guess she couldn't stand that anymore. And I think I gave her the last present for Christmas - got her rid of me. She has friends and they are more entertaining - I think she'll be OK.
Once again thank you very much for taking your time to write this down, man. )) You have a relief in music and I have yet to discover the possible way I can relieve my shit. For now on I'm just trying to minimize the incoming flow of it as much as possible. )
Thanks again. And merry Christmas.