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Am I being Selfish? Help Please?
14 years ago
General
First of all, first journal. Hi all of you who watch me. C: Sorry this first journal is long and some what complaining, but I would really appreciated some feed back on this.
So we are expecting to get pretty big chunk of money soon, and since we have everything we need for our baby except the usual small things you need to buy periodically, the hubs and I were thinking of doing a bit of tech upgrading. My husband for a long time has wanted to build a fish tank computer. We don't really fight over our desktop, but we can both need it for long chunks of time, often at the same time. This can get a little annoying, but we usually end up dealing and giving the other a chance when we can. The hubs was thinking this way we can each have our own good desktop custom built for what we need. Mine for digital art for example.
Okay, cool, that's actually really good idea I think, here is where the problem lies. Along with the new comp, I was really interested in getting a new graphics tablet. Not that mine is bad or anything, it works really well still, but I have always wanted one of the monitor tablets. I know I can do art a lot faster without the visual disconnection I have with the tablet I have now (aka drawing on the desktop but looking up at the screen.) I'm having a little trouble though, since I don't want the cheaper one, I want the more expensive one, and I feel it's a lot of money to drop on something like this. But here is the thing. The cheaper one, while an upgrade on working space and the whole looking where you are drawing thing, the pressure sensitivity levels of them pan are half of what the tablet I have now is. I feel like I would be spending a lot of money but downgrading if I got it. The more expensive one has the same levels, and a much larger work space, and of course the whole drawing on screen thing. The more I think about how I might be getting it though, the more selfish I feel. Like I should be spending this money on the baby (but what, if we have everything? Not to mention I ALWAYS put my baby's needs first! She will have everything she needs before I will waste money on myself!) or saving it (even though we would still be saving a chunk of the money we are getting) or just, doing something else with it. (I don't know what though.)
So I want to ask you guys what your opinions are. Do you think it is selfish of me to get this really expensive thing for myself? I can think of reasons to get it, increase in art output speed, putting money into the economy, less chance of developing carpel tunnel because I could draw from the shoulder more instead of from the wrist. But I kind of feel like those reason are shitty, and I'm just trying to justify my selfishness. I feel like unless I can get a little more professional with this, (And I would really like to) it is a lot of money to dump on a hobby. A serious hobby, but still a hobby. But at the same time, I REALLY want it!
IDK... what do you guys think? be honest with me.
Also, I'd only be getting it if we are getting the amount of money we are estimating. If we get less and are going to have to use it all for the things we wanted to get, then I'm not even going to bother with it. It's just a possibility I was thinking about.
So we are expecting to get pretty big chunk of money soon, and since we have everything we need for our baby except the usual small things you need to buy periodically, the hubs and I were thinking of doing a bit of tech upgrading. My husband for a long time has wanted to build a fish tank computer. We don't really fight over our desktop, but we can both need it for long chunks of time, often at the same time. This can get a little annoying, but we usually end up dealing and giving the other a chance when we can. The hubs was thinking this way we can each have our own good desktop custom built for what we need. Mine for digital art for example.
Okay, cool, that's actually really good idea I think, here is where the problem lies. Along with the new comp, I was really interested in getting a new graphics tablet. Not that mine is bad or anything, it works really well still, but I have always wanted one of the monitor tablets. I know I can do art a lot faster without the visual disconnection I have with the tablet I have now (aka drawing on the desktop but looking up at the screen.) I'm having a little trouble though, since I don't want the cheaper one, I want the more expensive one, and I feel it's a lot of money to drop on something like this. But here is the thing. The cheaper one, while an upgrade on working space and the whole looking where you are drawing thing, the pressure sensitivity levels of them pan are half of what the tablet I have now is. I feel like I would be spending a lot of money but downgrading if I got it. The more expensive one has the same levels, and a much larger work space, and of course the whole drawing on screen thing. The more I think about how I might be getting it though, the more selfish I feel. Like I should be spending this money on the baby (but what, if we have everything? Not to mention I ALWAYS put my baby's needs first! She will have everything she needs before I will waste money on myself!) or saving it (even though we would still be saving a chunk of the money we are getting) or just, doing something else with it. (I don't know what though.)
So I want to ask you guys what your opinions are. Do you think it is selfish of me to get this really expensive thing for myself? I can think of reasons to get it, increase in art output speed, putting money into the economy, less chance of developing carpel tunnel because I could draw from the shoulder more instead of from the wrist. But I kind of feel like those reason are shitty, and I'm just trying to justify my selfishness. I feel like unless I can get a little more professional with this, (And I would really like to) it is a lot of money to dump on a hobby. A serious hobby, but still a hobby. But at the same time, I REALLY want it!
IDK... what do you guys think? be honest with me.
Also, I'd only be getting it if we are getting the amount of money we are estimating. If we get less and are going to have to use it all for the things we wanted to get, then I'm not even going to bother with it. It's just a possibility I was thinking about.
