I just got out of bed after having no sleep, I had put bandages on prior cause of...( sounds gross and is ) leakage...its NOT fun or pretty and just ugh..ick..at thispoint I'm pretty sure I'll have no nipples to speak of and will need grafts when I have top surgery..but anyway to give an idea..and ( yes I'm somewhat open to sharing ) the nipple and some of the areola that was once a healthy moca..is now blackish grey, raised and irritated..leaking what appears to be puss and has puss pockets underneath skin thats trying to heal. gross huh? ya..ITCHES LIKE HELL!!

so basically open legions that don't heal, if at all for a day or two after ishower and cover them let them leak out over night remove bandages let them dry out then before I sleep bandage again etc, the whole process is continuous and each day it either looks better or worse...I'm tired of this..I wish they just cut em off already! but no I have to wait..such is life...and I have to suffer through this until the deed is done..

in the end I hope to have a clean bill of health, I see a doc on the 28th, we shall see what happens.

Merry Christmas