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Time for a Change
14 years ago
General
This is going to upset a few people, yet I feel it is for the best.
The fact is my fursona doesn't match me as closely as I would like. Sure, it's nice to have him be all buff and strong as a boxer... yet... I'm not. I don't have that physique, and even if I did, I don't think boxing has ever been more than a fetish for me. Most of my favorite pictures and stories that deal with boxing are the more violent ones. And it wasn't until I got a bit of a shock looking at something on FA that I began to rethink Bandit's role as a boxer.
What that something was I don't feel comfortable sharing. For one, it involves someone I won't name who's on my watch list. For another, I talked with a friend and he said I was over-reacting. And maybe I was. Still, whether I did or not, it had the benefit of making me rethink things. So, tough as it's gonna be, I have to make a change. Maybe a few.
First, I think I'm gonna avoid having Bandit portrayed as a boxer anymore. It really doesn't fit who I am. I have a much more interesting role for him, one that serves as a metaphor for how I imagine my creative process works (though I admit I may have stolen the idea from another writer on another site). It actually feels a lot like Myst in my mind. I've always felt a bit of kinship with Atrus from both the games and the novels. And though perhaps I'm a bit more spiritual than him, I don't think it'd be hard for us to get along. Heck, I always feel like a long-lost friend when I play the later games. A testament to the incredible acting and writing in them.
But I digress. I really do feel this is a better direction for me to go in. Even if it leads me away from boxing stuff entirely, well... so what? It's not the most important thing in my life. And there's plenty of other stuff I can use to fill the void. Besides, so long as I hang onto the boxing stuff I feel like I'm just... how shall I say this... "dancing on the line"? Like I'm "mocking God", or trying to have it both ways. And to be honest, I don't want to do that. And if it means giving up the stuff I've put so much time and interest into...
...well, so be it.
In any case, I think I'll delete the more violent stuff from my favorites and any older stuff I find swimming around in my harddrive. Perhaps I'll keep some of the boxing stories I've started, but I may take a break from them. I can come back to them once I know I can approach them with a much more mature attitude. Or I may just let them fade. Who knows? But it's important I break with this in pursuit of bettering myself and knowing myself more. And I think this will help.
I'll keep stuff in my gallery though. I don't see any reason to take that art down, not until I start getting comments or notes that I don't like. Until then, I see no reason not to leave them up.
Guess I better get started. Wish me luck.
The fact is my fursona doesn't match me as closely as I would like. Sure, it's nice to have him be all buff and strong as a boxer... yet... I'm not. I don't have that physique, and even if I did, I don't think boxing has ever been more than a fetish for me. Most of my favorite pictures and stories that deal with boxing are the more violent ones. And it wasn't until I got a bit of a shock looking at something on FA that I began to rethink Bandit's role as a boxer.
What that something was I don't feel comfortable sharing. For one, it involves someone I won't name who's on my watch list. For another, I talked with a friend and he said I was over-reacting. And maybe I was. Still, whether I did or not, it had the benefit of making me rethink things. So, tough as it's gonna be, I have to make a change. Maybe a few.
First, I think I'm gonna avoid having Bandit portrayed as a boxer anymore. It really doesn't fit who I am. I have a much more interesting role for him, one that serves as a metaphor for how I imagine my creative process works (though I admit I may have stolen the idea from another writer on another site). It actually feels a lot like Myst in my mind. I've always felt a bit of kinship with Atrus from both the games and the novels. And though perhaps I'm a bit more spiritual than him, I don't think it'd be hard for us to get along. Heck, I always feel like a long-lost friend when I play the later games. A testament to the incredible acting and writing in them.
But I digress. I really do feel this is a better direction for me to go in. Even if it leads me away from boxing stuff entirely, well... so what? It's not the most important thing in my life. And there's plenty of other stuff I can use to fill the void. Besides, so long as I hang onto the boxing stuff I feel like I'm just... how shall I say this... "dancing on the line"? Like I'm "mocking God", or trying to have it both ways. And to be honest, I don't want to do that. And if it means giving up the stuff I've put so much time and interest into...
...well, so be it.
In any case, I think I'll delete the more violent stuff from my favorites and any older stuff I find swimming around in my harddrive. Perhaps I'll keep some of the boxing stories I've started, but I may take a break from them. I can come back to them once I know I can approach them with a much more mature attitude. Or I may just let them fade. Who knows? But it's important I break with this in pursuit of bettering myself and knowing myself more. And I think this will help.
I'll keep stuff in my gallery though. I don't see any reason to take that art down, not until I start getting comments or notes that I don't like. Until then, I see no reason not to leave them up.
Guess I better get started. Wish me luck.
LUCK!
:3
Good luck with the redesign!