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#318 - Not entirely as Planned.
14 years ago
Well FA, I'm back.
This holiday season was a wild one and it's taken me a while to recover to the point where I feel comfortable coming back and reasserting myself.
Nothing this holiday season went as planned. Some of you know that Dragonrift and I had been planning on getting together and at least spending new year's together. It has been something I've been looking forward to since september, when his work officially started letting people book time off for the holidays.
We asked for the time off then. Of the original tuesday - monday we asked for, we got Friday - monday. A disappointment yes, but I could live with that. I was still excited to see him. He applied for his EDL (which in his state allows him to cross the border sans passport) and we waited. And waited. And waited. Finally on the thursday before he was supposed to travel, he had to cancel.
Needless to say, I was crushed.
It's been since July since I've seen him and it will again, be late march or early april before we're together again. We both went through our upsets about it. Him on thursday night and me on friday. I had to leave Facebook and Twitter alone while I consoled myself, I didn't want to dump on everyone. Every time someone asked me if I was okay, or how I was holding up I would lose all the control I'd had on my emotions and just end up bawling. It was a major disappointment to me.
The sad part for me really was that The Monster had gotten excited to see him too. I'd been telling her all week that we would be having Rift over to visit. Since we've been talking on skype since about May she's had her fair share of interactions with him. She knows when he calls that I get happy and she knows when to tell him to go to bed (he works nights so he's in bed @ 10am, she'll even call him on it) So the fact that he was coming was a big deal to her.
We got the news while we were out shopping for groceries. I was really grateful to have LucidPariah and kittara there when I found out, cause it took me a couple seconds to compose myself. The Monster kept offering me hugs as we went and gathered our groceries that night, reaching up from her seat in the trolly.
We rang in the new year with LOADS of friends though. To name drop and point out the awesomeness of people: SilverRWolfe RadeMala BabyDrake wolfer101 Kiki and Lucid and a few more whose FA names escape me, showed up to party. The most awesomest of all though and who the party would have been nothing without was Malicaifoxhe gave us the hangout and crash space necessary to host the furries and provided a LOT of entertainment. Videos, video games, hot tubbing, a dance floor and a piano to play with. It was AMAZING. We had a great time.
After the festivities of the New year I came home and was basically exhausted the next day. I couldn't even bring myself to participate in my regular sunday evening ritual of Pushed to Talk (hosted sundays at 6pm PST) I was just tired and sad because I told them that I would call in with Dragonrift right next to me and make him talk! (He almost always has an opinion, but never calls in!) So it was with a heavy heart that I avoided that pain. Rift and I spent most of the evening on skype together. We both felt disheartened at the loss of our time together so we tried to make the best of it over the internet.
Monday came with its own trials. Overnight Rift's mom fell into some bad health and had to be hospitalized. My first reaction was to go, "How can I help?" the idea came up that I could travel there, but we didn't know how long his mom would be in for, and we both knew she wouldn't appreciate coming home to me and my little one there. So we let that rest for now. Tuesday rolled around and it didn't look like she'd be home for a couple days, I brought up the idea again but struck it down because we figured he would be going back to work on wednesday and it just didn't make a whole lot of sense for me to come down to basically go back up after a few hours. Well, he didn't go on wednesday and we spent the evening talking about it. I should have just taken the initiative and gone for it. It would have been totally worth it to spend some quality time with my dragon. But the past is the past and there really isn't anything I can do for it, now is there?
So the last couple days I've been sitting at home, reflecting on the events of the last week and wishing things could have been different. They can't, but a girl can dream right?
In closing, I'm back. I'm still a little emotionally raw and drained, my sleep schedule is still a little off whack, but I'm getting there slowly. Hopefully this spring will yield better results in terms of getting to see Dragonrift, but we'll see. These things are a trial, and I intend to pass this test.
Hope you all had a wonderful holiday
Rhari
TL;DR? Had plans for the holidays, they were dashed, I am disappoint, lots of possibilities for alternate realities.
This would almost make an awesome comic arc.
This holiday season was a wild one and it's taken me a while to recover to the point where I feel comfortable coming back and reasserting myself.
Nothing this holiday season went as planned. Some of you know that Dragonrift and I had been planning on getting together and at least spending new year's together. It has been something I've been looking forward to since september, when his work officially started letting people book time off for the holidays.
We asked for the time off then. Of the original tuesday - monday we asked for, we got Friday - monday. A disappointment yes, but I could live with that. I was still excited to see him. He applied for his EDL (which in his state allows him to cross the border sans passport) and we waited. And waited. And waited. Finally on the thursday before he was supposed to travel, he had to cancel.
Needless to say, I was crushed.
It's been since July since I've seen him and it will again, be late march or early april before we're together again. We both went through our upsets about it. Him on thursday night and me on friday. I had to leave Facebook and Twitter alone while I consoled myself, I didn't want to dump on everyone. Every time someone asked me if I was okay, or how I was holding up I would lose all the control I'd had on my emotions and just end up bawling. It was a major disappointment to me.
The sad part for me really was that The Monster had gotten excited to see him too. I'd been telling her all week that we would be having Rift over to visit. Since we've been talking on skype since about May she's had her fair share of interactions with him. She knows when he calls that I get happy and she knows when to tell him to go to bed (he works nights so he's in bed @ 10am, she'll even call him on it) So the fact that he was coming was a big deal to her.
We got the news while we were out shopping for groceries. I was really grateful to have LucidPariah and kittara there when I found out, cause it took me a couple seconds to compose myself. The Monster kept offering me hugs as we went and gathered our groceries that night, reaching up from her seat in the trolly.
We rang in the new year with LOADS of friends though. To name drop and point out the awesomeness of people: SilverRWolfe RadeMala BabyDrake wolfer101 Kiki and Lucid and a few more whose FA names escape me, showed up to party. The most awesomest of all though and who the party would have been nothing without was Malicaifoxhe gave us the hangout and crash space necessary to host the furries and provided a LOT of entertainment. Videos, video games, hot tubbing, a dance floor and a piano to play with. It was AMAZING. We had a great time.
After the festivities of the New year I came home and was basically exhausted the next day. I couldn't even bring myself to participate in my regular sunday evening ritual of Pushed to Talk (hosted sundays at 6pm PST) I was just tired and sad because I told them that I would call in with Dragonrift right next to me and make him talk! (He almost always has an opinion, but never calls in!) So it was with a heavy heart that I avoided that pain. Rift and I spent most of the evening on skype together. We both felt disheartened at the loss of our time together so we tried to make the best of it over the internet.
Monday came with its own trials. Overnight Rift's mom fell into some bad health and had to be hospitalized. My first reaction was to go, "How can I help?" the idea came up that I could travel there, but we didn't know how long his mom would be in for, and we both knew she wouldn't appreciate coming home to me and my little one there. So we let that rest for now. Tuesday rolled around and it didn't look like she'd be home for a couple days, I brought up the idea again but struck it down because we figured he would be going back to work on wednesday and it just didn't make a whole lot of sense for me to come down to basically go back up after a few hours. Well, he didn't go on wednesday and we spent the evening talking about it. I should have just taken the initiative and gone for it. It would have been totally worth it to spend some quality time with my dragon. But the past is the past and there really isn't anything I can do for it, now is there?
So the last couple days I've been sitting at home, reflecting on the events of the last week and wishing things could have been different. They can't, but a girl can dream right?
In closing, I'm back. I'm still a little emotionally raw and drained, my sleep schedule is still a little off whack, but I'm getting there slowly. Hopefully this spring will yield better results in terms of getting to see Dragonrift, but we'll see. These things are a trial, and I intend to pass this test.
Hope you all had a wonderful holiday
Rhari
TL;DR? Had plans for the holidays, they were dashed, I am disappoint, lots of possibilities for alternate realities.
This would almost make an awesome comic arc.
*hugs*
New year brings new chances to see your friends and family, though! =3
Oh baby oh.