and yet again, i do not look forward for it.... it is yet again a time to remember the fight in the family, about me and money...
i hate this season much, i feel shitty, not understood....
now my medical issue gives me more worries, i just cant handle it much

i guess ill be celebrating my birthday again, with 2 aunts and uncles..... and 3 or 4 friends...

i not shure what to think of this time... people say im nice, but i feel like a prick.


aswell as money gets more and more of an issue... i am behind in payin for basic shit, cant get my medical stuff, since insurance doesnt pay out.
been to the docter before to ask for the stuff i require, and all i get is medical research, but they couldnt find any reason... so i am lying (atleast i think they think that)

so enough reasons to jump infront of a train...
im scared i grow a depression or what....

--help--