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I need friends.
14 years ago
General
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Mastodon: @Snapai@dragon.style | Pixelfed: @Snapai@pix.weanimatethings.com | Peertube: @snapai@watch.weanimatethings.comTelegram Links
@Snapai (me) / @Snapimation (art)Not online friends, I have several of those, thank you all for being around. I have enough online friends to find someone in each timezone to chat with, often enough.
What I don't have is people nearby iRL who care enough about me to want to hang out, call me and some other folks up to go see a movie, or hang out, whatever.
I AM BORED AS A.....VERY BORED PERSON. And a boring person.
I don't WANT to be Bert, I don't want to be Jon Arbuckle. But that's what things seem to be turning into.
But hell if I'm going to go through the phone book section for "bars and clubs", pick at random, go on my own, and hope I don't die.
Besides, socializing with complete strangers is....not really my thing. I want my people. I had people to hang out with in college. After college, I had a few local folks I knew well and I collected roommates so there were people to chat with occasionally.
But not now. Now, I feel like I have never been more alone in my life. I don't exactly have close friends anymore....more like acquaintances, who know my name, get along with me reasonably well, but then go away and have their own friends. Or I have friends, but they're really too busy having their own lives and families to get together and DO STUFF anymore.
Maybe I should try to put some parties together at my apartment with the people I do know, and get them to bring some friends too? I don't know, I've never been much of an extravert, but at least with my own apartment, I could somewhat control the environment I find myself in. Of course, I'd have to clean it extra good to make it suitable for entertaining.
....
Anyways, I probably shouldn't forget to take my herbal antidepressant (5-HTP) in the morning like I did today. :| It makes me feel like I ate a huge plate of cold and slightly-off scrambled eggs, but at least it keeps me happy and blissfully ignorant of my own issues. >.<
In the meantime, I'm back to working on losing weight and bootstrapping basic strength. Maybe a better body image will help my own self-image. But since I'm not in my 20s any more, what are the odds of appearing even the slightest bit physically attractive to any healthy single childless female and crazy-in-the-good-way women anyway? :P
FML.
(PS: I'll probably delete this journal tomorrow when it feels too whiny and self-pitying to leave online, so enjoy it while it lasts.)
What I don't have is people nearby iRL who care enough about me to want to hang out, call me and some other folks up to go see a movie, or hang out, whatever.
I AM BORED AS A.....VERY BORED PERSON. And a boring person.
I don't WANT to be Bert, I don't want to be Jon Arbuckle. But that's what things seem to be turning into.
But hell if I'm going to go through the phone book section for "bars and clubs", pick at random, go on my own, and hope I don't die.
Besides, socializing with complete strangers is....not really my thing. I want my people. I had people to hang out with in college. After college, I had a few local folks I knew well and I collected roommates so there were people to chat with occasionally.
But not now. Now, I feel like I have never been more alone in my life. I don't exactly have close friends anymore....more like acquaintances, who know my name, get along with me reasonably well, but then go away and have their own friends. Or I have friends, but they're really too busy having their own lives and families to get together and DO STUFF anymore.
Maybe I should try to put some parties together at my apartment with the people I do know, and get them to bring some friends too? I don't know, I've never been much of an extravert, but at least with my own apartment, I could somewhat control the environment I find myself in. Of course, I'd have to clean it extra good to make it suitable for entertaining.
....
Anyways, I probably shouldn't forget to take my herbal antidepressant (5-HTP) in the morning like I did today. :| It makes me feel like I ate a huge plate of cold and slightly-off scrambled eggs, but at least it keeps me happy and blissfully ignorant of my own issues. >.<
In the meantime, I'm back to working on losing weight and bootstrapping basic strength. Maybe a better body image will help my own self-image. But since I'm not in my 20s any more, what are the odds of appearing even the slightest bit physically attractive to any healthy single childless female and crazy-in-the-good-way women anyway? :P
FML.
(PS: I'll probably delete this journal tomorrow when it feels too whiny and self-pitying to leave online, so enjoy it while it lasts.)
Where abouts are you located?
I need to get myself to more meetups. I will say tho that two of my best friends I met at a meetup. So you never know what'll come out of going to them!
>:U
It may help to post a little something in the forums on the triangle fur's website. Mention what sorts of things you like to do, the types of movies you want to see, etc. Or set up a time to meet a few folks for lunch. Keep it small and simple, and see if you feel the spark of friendship with those folks.
For as big as the local group is (about 100 active furs, give or take) I'm sure you can find a few folks that you've got alot in common with
Good luck, Snapai. ^'===='^;
So... sadly I can't help you out, but I do relate and understand. ):