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Reject Activist
13 years ago
I'm really raging right now. well I guess only kind of. You'll notice I don't post here much anymore. I don't really feel that words can accurately express how I feel.
I'm a reject. I guess it doesn't bother me anymore. Even though I don't know many other rejects I know they are out there and that I'm not alone
MOVING ON!
There was this lady who spoke to me a while ago about how my mother was terrible for not supporting my transition and how if it was her son she would be supportive. My mom used to get really pissed at people not supporting her strife as "they don't know what it's like".
WELL....
This women just came up to me today and her son just came out as transgender to her at the age of 16 (same age I told my mom) Her [I'm going to say daughter now] daughter was having hallucinations, just like I used to, has tourettes, just like I do, and suffered horrible depression, just like I do, oh and was put on Cyroquil, JUST LIKE I WAS
So how did this women react when her child came out to her? She took her newfound daughter and got a refferal for hormones in a WEEK. It took me 6 months to get where this child is. Not to count the years I was in hiding because when I came out at 16 my mother refused to assist me.
I gave this women my email if she ever needs help with local resources and I thanked her profusely for being a good parent and congratulated her. I was nearly in tears. I am so happy for this child to have what I could not. TO go through highschool as THEMSELVES.
However on the other hand I am reminded of how that choice was taken from me. I was forced to live as a male for 5 years, harming myself, doing drugs, getting involved with sex workers, attempting suicide.... those are the gifts and the scars my mother gave me and it's hard not to hate her for it... even now she calls me a boy. she tries to accept and is getting there but even so I find myself wanting to scream at her... That's why I have to fight so hard for transgender children. So they can have the choice I did not. That's why I'm joining a comittee for my local LGBT organization to raise awareness for transgender issues.
But still.... I wonder if it will ever stop hurting....
I'm a reject. I guess it doesn't bother me anymore. Even though I don't know many other rejects I know they are out there and that I'm not alone
MOVING ON!
There was this lady who spoke to me a while ago about how my mother was terrible for not supporting my transition and how if it was her son she would be supportive. My mom used to get really pissed at people not supporting her strife as "they don't know what it's like".
WELL....
This women just came up to me today and her son just came out as transgender to her at the age of 16 (same age I told my mom) Her [I'm going to say daughter now] daughter was having hallucinations, just like I used to, has tourettes, just like I do, and suffered horrible depression, just like I do, oh and was put on Cyroquil, JUST LIKE I WAS
So how did this women react when her child came out to her? She took her newfound daughter and got a refferal for hormones in a WEEK. It took me 6 months to get where this child is. Not to count the years I was in hiding because when I came out at 16 my mother refused to assist me.
I gave this women my email if she ever needs help with local resources and I thanked her profusely for being a good parent and congratulated her. I was nearly in tears. I am so happy for this child to have what I could not. TO go through highschool as THEMSELVES.
However on the other hand I am reminded of how that choice was taken from me. I was forced to live as a male for 5 years, harming myself, doing drugs, getting involved with sex workers, attempting suicide.... those are the gifts and the scars my mother gave me and it's hard not to hate her for it... even now she calls me a boy. she tries to accept and is getting there but even so I find myself wanting to scream at her... That's why I have to fight so hard for transgender children. So they can have the choice I did not. That's why I'm joining a comittee for my local LGBT organization to raise awareness for transgender issues.
But still.... I wonder if it will ever stop hurting....
*hugs tight* Love ya anyway, sis!