I'm not usually one to post my feelings into words cause I never seem to have a way to do it. Usually I keep how I feel inside because I don't think people wanna see me in pain, and I don't want people to feel bad. I mean I notice how a lot of people put heartfelt thought into their journals when sad. But I just never seem to be able to capture that in a normal way. Poetry is normally my out let, but it's so cliche.

But All honesty. No I'm not doing well right now. I'm physically ill, I freaking love someone I shouldn't and they don't love me back, I have a crush on a friend of mine, that I consider close, and I have my sister tryin to hook me up with another friend. Not to mention my job hunt isn't going well. I get this terrible feeling in my gut when I see my friends get commissions and I don't, I get jealous and feel like a lousy artist and it's not their fault, everyone is a wonderful artist in their own way. But I just get a feeling of inadequacy when I seem over looked. And If any of y'all read this don't feel bad please I mean really please. This is an issue that stems from my lil bro's birth....When he was born I suddenly had no love come my way. But that's off topic. I don't want anyone feeling bad for me. I have issues just like the rest of the world. I will say I just want to show people I'm more then what they take me for...All I get pinned as both irl and Online; Lazy, baby, furry, babyfur, retard, stupid, depressed, emo, hyper critical, a sex fiend*, a poet, a strategist*, lucky in a bad way, useless,a tranny, and so much more.

*are negatives that are effected by minute things that aren't connected to him as a whole

I want some one to see me Dani, the real me for me, I don't want to have to give up who I am for your love, or try and hide things so you are happy, I want to be happy, and Be me! I deserve that just as much as any other person on this mud ball we call Earth.