..been feelin' down, oodles. School is beginning to take a very very unfortunate and not good backseat to finding a job and getting some money to help pay for my apartment. At this point, I can only live here for another month. Its truly difficult not having financial aid from my parents in this college turmoil. I've also been deficient of friends in Seattle. I don't seem to be able to connect with anyone in the design department save maybe one or two people.

How do I make money with my photography? I had this vision of selling some on the side to help me through school, but its completely not happening, how do I get my feet wet?

Why doesn't anyone want to hire me? I realize my resume is 7 months of IT and a year of janitorial work and I have long hair, but is everyone so blind to everything except the superficial that they can't see how badly I need work or how committed I would gladly be to making money for and with their business..?

Sorry guys, design is kicking my ass. Its right in between the emotional aspects art and the organizational importance of photography. But for some reason, I can't seem to master the subtlety it requires. I'm always either to focussed on one end of the spectrum or the other. But the real problem is that I just can't seem to focus on my class work recently. I love design, but its like as soon as its labeled as homework, someone has thrown a bucket of toxic, florescent paint of it and I don't want to go near it. Can't tell you how much I hoped that problem wouldn't follow from high school, but apparently it did.

Sorry for the rant, just low today.