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The view from Saturday
13 years ago
General
Weekends are meant for relaxing not stress. I have had to turn my phone off various times this week for different reasons. If I don't pick up leave me a message. Do not blow up my phone calling multiple times or it makes me that much more likely to block you and forget you even exist.
Also, I am sick of morons lately. If I tell you I am NOT interested, I mean it. You may want to say that I should give you a chance, but you know what? You don't f***king own me like some d**n piece of property. You should respect my right to free will and understand there is someone else in my life at the moment who I am courting. It sucks being single, I realize this. I've lived through years of it and isolation from people, but I somehow managed to survive. Who knows where my current relationship will go, but its none of your f**king business if I don't want it to be. I used to think I was a pushover, but overtime I learned not to be quiet and timid. I am assertive and I will not back down. You can have whatever diluted fantasies you want to in your head, but I am NOT, and let me repeat with an underscore, NOT going to be subject to you just because you can't take the fucking hint that I have lost interest. If I talk less to you and don't show romantic interest then that should be a sign with proverbial bright neon lights, Sherlock. IT MEANS I AM IN ALL PROBABILITY NOT INTERESTED IN YOU.
That being said let me get to the meat and potatoes of my stressful week.
I just started an internship and it feels overwhelming. I go in there everyday learning things I never learned in the classroom. I don't know if teachers did not have time to teach these things or if they were just beyond the scope of these classes. I try to code things and I have had to ask several people for help on a project. The first one went fine, but now this second project has me completely bamboozled. Its a project dealing with a lot of object-class interaction and I have not seen anything like it until two days ago. There is no deadline on the project, I am just supposed to work on it. Each day that goes by that I work on this makes me feel like I don't understand like 80% of it. I know they wouldn't have given me the internship if they didn't feel I couldn't understand the material, it just feels debilitating when you hit several cognitive walls in one day. I keep asking other co-workers for help which is what I am supposed to do, I just wish I had more of a sense of accomplishment from this job. I start something hypothetically at about 8 in the morning and when it look up, it is almost time for lunch. Is this what internships are supposed to be like? Should I express my concerns to my supervisor? I'm not used to being in a position as complex as mine. Anyone have advice?
Also, I am sick of morons lately. If I tell you I am NOT interested, I mean it. You may want to say that I should give you a chance, but you know what? You don't f***king own me like some d**n piece of property. You should respect my right to free will and understand there is someone else in my life at the moment who I am courting. It sucks being single, I realize this. I've lived through years of it and isolation from people, but I somehow managed to survive. Who knows where my current relationship will go, but its none of your f**king business if I don't want it to be. I used to think I was a pushover, but overtime I learned not to be quiet and timid. I am assertive and I will not back down. You can have whatever diluted fantasies you want to in your head, but I am NOT, and let me repeat with an underscore, NOT going to be subject to you just because you can't take the fucking hint that I have lost interest. If I talk less to you and don't show romantic interest then that should be a sign with proverbial bright neon lights, Sherlock. IT MEANS I AM IN ALL PROBABILITY NOT INTERESTED IN YOU.
That being said let me get to the meat and potatoes of my stressful week.
I just started an internship and it feels overwhelming. I go in there everyday learning things I never learned in the classroom. I don't know if teachers did not have time to teach these things or if they were just beyond the scope of these classes. I try to code things and I have had to ask several people for help on a project. The first one went fine, but now this second project has me completely bamboozled. Its a project dealing with a lot of object-class interaction and I have not seen anything like it until two days ago. There is no deadline on the project, I am just supposed to work on it. Each day that goes by that I work on this makes me feel like I don't understand like 80% of it. I know they wouldn't have given me the internship if they didn't feel I couldn't understand the material, it just feels debilitating when you hit several cognitive walls in one day. I keep asking other co-workers for help which is what I am supposed to do, I just wish I had more of a sense of accomplishment from this job. I start something hypothetically at about 8 in the morning and when it look up, it is almost time for lunch. Is this what internships are supposed to be like? Should I express my concerns to my supervisor? I'm not used to being in a position as complex as mine. Anyone have advice?
