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I don't wanna have to start calling names...
13 years ago
...but there are some people that are really starting to piss me off over pettiest bullshit one could imagine. Seriously, if I'm that bad of a person, it would be a lot more obvious, wouldn't it? Take V, for instance; yes, I'm using letters in this instance cause I'm not at the point of calling names yet. I was shocked and surprised to see V at Anthrocon in the lineup for the fursuit parade of all places as I have known V for a couple of years but never really got the chance to talk to her at any depth until then. So I decide that maybe we should get some friends together and have a nice dinner, or at least one that was nice enough for the occasion. I was talking to a friend of mine whom V was assisting at their Dealer's Den booth when she sent me a message saying that she was keeping herself open for her ex-boyfriend if things change for the better between them. Fair enough, right? So I send a response back saying that I respect the decision and hope for the best for her.
Nothing.
I didn't see V for the rest of the con, so I sent her a note telling her that I wanted to sit down and have a face-to-face chat about various things. Again, my tone was respectful while indicating a hint of desire to become closer friends. . .the thought of a possible relationship was nowhere near the back of my mind as I wrote this out. But then I get a response from V that was both dismissive AND insulting at the same time, saying things like 'the silence should be a big hint' and that I had 'accomplished something she thought wasn't possible' by 'creeping her out' and that I somehow needed to 'get my shit together'. Okay chickie, let's make one thing clear. . .to me, not responding to the first invitation for a sit-down conversation was insulting enough as it was. Just saying no or something like "the time just isn't right" wouldn't have been considered so hostile. Maybe you're not up for it...whatever. But to duck me like a coward only to fire back at me with what you did? Congratulations, you've just manage to enrage somebody who is a very cool customer and does not anger easily! So I pretty much fired back at V for all the things she said, which were very much untrue. No response.
Fast forward to today. I see that V put up a simply con report for AC saying that she had a lot of fun there. Now I'm gonna take direct quotes when I saw a comment from one of my closest friends, and someone she roomed with. I can tell when something is a joke or said in a sarcastic manner, so I snickered when he (let's call him 'Z') put up a comment warning about telling everyone about the 'dirty dirty sex stuff'. So I see a response from V saying - AND I QUOTE:
"Yeah, like that hot four way between you, X (Z's mate, who is gayer than Christmas), Croco, and myself. OH MURR."
I know that event never happened, or I would've probably said something about it in a little more subtle tone. So I respond saying that I didn't remember that because I was really, REALLY smashed that night, but I was happy to finally meet her at the con. Okay. . .furcons and booze go together like peas and carrots, or so that's what I've observed. I then see that V put up a brief response in turn to that: "Go away." Maybe if I talked shit about you personally or insulted your mother somehow, maybe then you'd have a reason to tell me to fuck off and I would've probably deserved it for being the bastard that I apparently am. I try to crack a joke and heap praise upon you, only to have it thrown right back in my face? That and to put the cherry on top, V's fursona is one that I would have never expected from a female furry, so maybe you wouldn't fault me too much for wanting to befriend her.
But long story short, I've been biting my tongue as hard as I can on this ever since this shit went down. And if this person keeps it up? I don't wanna know what will happen, so they'd better cool the attitude and maybe, JUST MAYBE...we can at least be friends/chatbuddies.
There are a few more people that are really, REALLY testing my patience, but I won't bore you with details unless you want me to. Or unless this bubbles over again, whichever comes first. I don't like doing this, but sometimes a person doesn't really have a choice.
Nothing.
I didn't see V for the rest of the con, so I sent her a note telling her that I wanted to sit down and have a face-to-face chat about various things. Again, my tone was respectful while indicating a hint of desire to become closer friends. . .the thought of a possible relationship was nowhere near the back of my mind as I wrote this out. But then I get a response from V that was both dismissive AND insulting at the same time, saying things like 'the silence should be a big hint' and that I had 'accomplished something she thought wasn't possible' by 'creeping her out' and that I somehow needed to 'get my shit together'. Okay chickie, let's make one thing clear. . .to me, not responding to the first invitation for a sit-down conversation was insulting enough as it was. Just saying no or something like "the time just isn't right" wouldn't have been considered so hostile. Maybe you're not up for it...whatever. But to duck me like a coward only to fire back at me with what you did? Congratulations, you've just manage to enrage somebody who is a very cool customer and does not anger easily! So I pretty much fired back at V for all the things she said, which were very much untrue. No response.
Fast forward to today. I see that V put up a simply con report for AC saying that she had a lot of fun there. Now I'm gonna take direct quotes when I saw a comment from one of my closest friends, and someone she roomed with. I can tell when something is a joke or said in a sarcastic manner, so I snickered when he (let's call him 'Z') put up a comment warning about telling everyone about the 'dirty dirty sex stuff'. So I see a response from V saying - AND I QUOTE:
"Yeah, like that hot four way between you, X (Z's mate, who is gayer than Christmas), Croco, and myself. OH MURR."
I know that event never happened, or I would've probably said something about it in a little more subtle tone. So I respond saying that I didn't remember that because I was really, REALLY smashed that night, but I was happy to finally meet her at the con. Okay. . .furcons and booze go together like peas and carrots, or so that's what I've observed. I then see that V put up a brief response in turn to that: "Go away." Maybe if I talked shit about you personally or insulted your mother somehow, maybe then you'd have a reason to tell me to fuck off and I would've probably deserved it for being the bastard that I apparently am. I try to crack a joke and heap praise upon you, only to have it thrown right back in my face? That and to put the cherry on top, V's fursona is one that I would have never expected from a female furry, so maybe you wouldn't fault me too much for wanting to befriend her.
But long story short, I've been biting my tongue as hard as I can on this ever since this shit went down. And if this person keeps it up? I don't wanna know what will happen, so they'd better cool the attitude and maybe, JUST MAYBE...we can at least be friends/chatbuddies.
There are a few more people that are really, REALLY testing my patience, but I won't bore you with details unless you want me to. Or unless this bubbles over again, whichever comes first. I don't like doing this, but sometimes a person doesn't really have a choice.
“Come into Room, “Hit on all women if they look a certain way to you” all the females being hit on Have the same body type and you show no interest in anything else or any others in the room making it obvious how shallow of attempt this is going to be get booty to every body in the room by letting your cock do the talking or some crap like that.. Put on the same moves as every other dude like that until one is found that is an easy cash grab/fuck.
(Will rarely ever try something or somebody new no less.)
Attempt to charm women with overbearing “I am obsessed with you only because I can put my dick in you” so I am going to pretend I am interested in everything else but we all know there is only one end result it was already foreseen like fucking psychics by every female in the room when you walked into the door and started hitting every one up the same way.
Go down the line starting with female you think is hottest at that moment when rejected or advancements moving to slow move on to next female that meets your type of male mind set of the perfect female, could care less if she is dumb as a rock or a fucking noble peace prize scientist or creative artist or engineer as long as she can be banged in the end.
If female shows no interest in sex she gets ignored or is called a “friend” which basically means I want to hang out with you so I can always have fucking you in the back of my mind as I fantasize while we hang out.”
Oh and in the furry world this would be shallow narrow view limited to like 3 species as well you would not even touch most other species. Meaning “I only am interested in you because you are this fucking species”. (We all know what those are Furaffinty is full of males like this. But you take it to the extreme.)
Step 3
“”Dominate the female prey and clam her as yours if you cant do this you have no interest put on friend act until the day comes when you can get it done.”” Attempt to charm her by asking stuff about her even though you mostly do it so you can inflate the females EGO bigger than yours so you can fuck her later.
Step 4
?????
Step 5 profit?
Gets kinda old you should learn something from gay dudes they are fucking fantastic to hang out with as a female and get banged by you are trying to fucking hard to fuck something and dominate. Maybe you will get along better with females in the future.
Now that I've had some time to properly digest this, I think that was my biggest crime right there. If she were a fox or some kind of cat, it'd be a lot easier to dismiss and think something along the lines of "There's plenty more of her out there". No sleep lost over that. But she was something that I didn't think a female would be interested in...okay, she was an alligator, so in blind faith that she would be receptive one of her own kind, I decided to pursue. And as we can all see here, that was a spectacular mistake on my end.
But I do have to argue against one of the points that you make here. Since when was it set into stone that (mostly) heterosexual males could not have female friends that they do not have any interest in having sex with? I have quite a few of them myself that, while I enjoy being around them, I do not automatically think about boning them as soon as I make eye contact. If that were the case, then the only friends I would have would be gay guys, and just the thought of it is off-putting considering the type of gay guy that I usually attract.
That and, let's face it, furcons really have a hell of a way of fucking with your mind. . .must be all the pheromones or something. I don't know, but take a normally sane and reasonable person and put him in a building with about 5,000 people. Heck, it could only be 500, but unless he is completely satisfied with everything, he will actively pursue the one thing that he needs. Could be shelter ("Hey man, X bailed at the last second and now I'm stuck without a room...), could be food ("Hey, think you could cover me for something? I haven't eaten since I got here." When was this? "Thursday afternoon." Dude, it's Sunday...), or as we're debating here, sex. Simple biology at work here.
But the point I'm trying to make is that I just wanted to be her friend, and she only thought that I was after her just for sex. I told her I could care less about it, and she still flipped. That's where it should've ended, but I still had the blinders on. And...here we are having a therapy session, only without the cookie trays and pitchers of juice.
I welcome any counterpoints you would like to make, either here or in private.
As much as I would love to pick a part a heterosexual males brain and find out what really makes them tick…….. especially a furry heterosexual brain with a detailed tally and grouping of the choices in people/species/characters they make on Furry muck or tapestries or second life and maybe even real life but not so much interested in that. You know I am a hobby physclogist and all.
I tried to keep the explaining of the behavior short and vague it would take a small booklet of text for me to even describe the behavior and I was typing a phone keyboard and I don’t think furaffinty is a place to do it with all the furry cops watching.
Oh well, her loss. Especially if she does end up back with her ex, whom she dumped because he was a slacker with no job. But I digress.
I too have had to let people whom I thought were good friends go. They hurt me beyond belief , angered me etc. But those are the people you just have to let go.
You know? Just a random passerby. Take care and good luck with all this.