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Surviving China: Day 11
13 years ago
General
Day 11
This day is worth a whole entry.
I get picked up by my friend for the BBQ pretty early and we go to a meeting place under a bridge in the city. There’s not a lot of people there at first, but an hour passes and it was packed. He did not lie when he said that there were going to be about 30 people there. A head count later told us that there were 32 of us for the cook-out. We get to this nice little place by the river by renting ourselves a bus… and it rains. Most of us take shelter under this little pagoda thing and the rest of us find this huge, stone mushroom and squeeze under it. After having wasted enough time, a few of us, including me, go looking for a potential place to set up for the BBQ. There’s this little shack pretty close to where we are, but we don’t know if it’s owned by the tiny convenience store right next to it. They say that we can’t use it but for 100 Chinese yuan (that’s cheap. Divide it by 6 and that’s the American dollar equivalent), he’d offer us full services for the BBQ, including shelter from the rain, fire and grills to cook meat on, and even drinks when we want it.
We start up the BBQ and start cooking. Chicken hamburger patties first, then chicken and lamb kebabs, then steaks, eggplant, potatoes, mushrooms, sausages (which I was surprised no one used them for cock jokes, given how “friendly” they are with each other), blah blah blah. It’s notable how physical contact we’d (Americans) consider intimate are normal over here in China. They’re hugging, nuzzling, and placing their hands on weird places and it’s all natural. Even the bathroom isn’t that funny. It’s a little dreary to talk about them, in fact (holes, not toilets, and they’re especially stinky and dirty). They play this practical joke in China where they lift someone in the air and spread their legs, bring them to a tree, and *bam* ouch. I got to see it first hand and it was AWESOME.
When we finish up here, we decide we all want to go do something else, so we go over to this nifty little entertainment building equipped with small stores, a movie theatre, arcade, and tons of other cool stuff. There’s also a separate, but close, building that’s used by a TV/radio station and you can reserve a room and do karaoke and stuff with friends for however long you feel like. I hit the arcade first and we play mostly Tekken and stuff. The DDR’s different (diagonals instead of up, down, left, right), so I stay away from that. At Tekken, it’s not Marvel vs. Capcom, so I feel like it’s a little slow at first, but then I get into it and end up getting a huge winning streak against some of the guys we hung out with today. By the time we’re done with that (it’s one token per play ), I’m only down 4 tokens and they’re down 7 each. I guess I’m just that good. When we’re finished there, we head over to the karaoke place and the guys who were already there are drinking this sweet, really diluted beer that has, like, no alcohol in it (though you can kinda taste it) and I have some of that. They insist that they want to hear me sing American songs, so I sing “Yellow” by Coldplay because it was the first one suggested. Then I do “Rolling in the Deep” by Adelle, then “In the End” by Linkin Park, and by the end, I’m pretty popular. The girls are going crazy by the end of “Rolling in the Deep.”
We hit dinner at a really fancy restaurant and I cry because there was this rice dish we ordered with A LOT of jalapeños and habaneros. I’m not alone, though, on this. We have dead baby jokes and other crap in America. They have what is roughly translated into “cold jokes,” which are designed to make you feel cold after telling them. One of them: A cracker was walking down the street and got hungry. It ate itself. Not particularly funny in English, but it is sooooo funny in Chinese. In rapid succession, these are hilarious. We guys talk about videogames for a while and they bring up League of Legends and that makes me think of ‘DIS GUY ->
hellshadow65. They are jealous of me because of my access to all the new technology. I’m jealous of them because of their 3 (divided by 6 for American currency) yuan videogames (NEW, TOO. WTF. 50 CENTS FOR NEW GAMES).
After dinner, half of the group leaves and the rest of us want to go play pool, so we go to this billiards bar (oh my god, I’m in a bar) and we drink (oh my god, I’m drinking legally) and play pool (oh my god, I suck at pool). We get a ride on this scooter that somehow fit three of us and get a ride back home that night at 11:30. I wasn’t drunk, though, so I guess my limit is more than one can of Budweiser.
Awesome day.
This day is worth a whole entry.
I get picked up by my friend for the BBQ pretty early and we go to a meeting place under a bridge in the city. There’s not a lot of people there at first, but an hour passes and it was packed. He did not lie when he said that there were going to be about 30 people there. A head count later told us that there were 32 of us for the cook-out. We get to this nice little place by the river by renting ourselves a bus… and it rains. Most of us take shelter under this little pagoda thing and the rest of us find this huge, stone mushroom and squeeze under it. After having wasted enough time, a few of us, including me, go looking for a potential place to set up for the BBQ. There’s this little shack pretty close to where we are, but we don’t know if it’s owned by the tiny convenience store right next to it. They say that we can’t use it but for 100 Chinese yuan (that’s cheap. Divide it by 6 and that’s the American dollar equivalent), he’d offer us full services for the BBQ, including shelter from the rain, fire and grills to cook meat on, and even drinks when we want it.
We start up the BBQ and start cooking. Chicken hamburger patties first, then chicken and lamb kebabs, then steaks, eggplant, potatoes, mushrooms, sausages (which I was surprised no one used them for cock jokes, given how “friendly” they are with each other), blah blah blah. It’s notable how physical contact we’d (Americans) consider intimate are normal over here in China. They’re hugging, nuzzling, and placing their hands on weird places and it’s all natural. Even the bathroom isn’t that funny. It’s a little dreary to talk about them, in fact (holes, not toilets, and they’re especially stinky and dirty). They play this practical joke in China where they lift someone in the air and spread their legs, bring them to a tree, and *bam* ouch. I got to see it first hand and it was AWESOME.
When we finish up here, we decide we all want to go do something else, so we go over to this nifty little entertainment building equipped with small stores, a movie theatre, arcade, and tons of other cool stuff. There’s also a separate, but close, building that’s used by a TV/radio station and you can reserve a room and do karaoke and stuff with friends for however long you feel like. I hit the arcade first and we play mostly Tekken and stuff. The DDR’s different (diagonals instead of up, down, left, right), so I stay away from that. At Tekken, it’s not Marvel vs. Capcom, so I feel like it’s a little slow at first, but then I get into it and end up getting a huge winning streak against some of the guys we hung out with today. By the time we’re done with that (it’s one token per play ), I’m only down 4 tokens and they’re down 7 each. I guess I’m just that good. When we’re finished there, we head over to the karaoke place and the guys who were already there are drinking this sweet, really diluted beer that has, like, no alcohol in it (though you can kinda taste it) and I have some of that. They insist that they want to hear me sing American songs, so I sing “Yellow” by Coldplay because it was the first one suggested. Then I do “Rolling in the Deep” by Adelle, then “In the End” by Linkin Park, and by the end, I’m pretty popular. The girls are going crazy by the end of “Rolling in the Deep.”
We hit dinner at a really fancy restaurant and I cry because there was this rice dish we ordered with A LOT of jalapeños and habaneros. I’m not alone, though, on this. We have dead baby jokes and other crap in America. They have what is roughly translated into “cold jokes,” which are designed to make you feel cold after telling them. One of them: A cracker was walking down the street and got hungry. It ate itself. Not particularly funny in English, but it is sooooo funny in Chinese. In rapid succession, these are hilarious. We guys talk about videogames for a while and they bring up League of Legends and that makes me think of ‘DIS GUY ->
hellshadow65. They are jealous of me because of my access to all the new technology. I’m jealous of them because of their 3 (divided by 6 for American currency) yuan videogames (NEW, TOO. WTF. 50 CENTS FOR NEW GAMES).After dinner, half of the group leaves and the rest of us want to go play pool, so we go to this billiards bar (oh my god, I’m in a bar) and we drink (oh my god, I’m drinking legally) and play pool (oh my god, I suck at pool). We get a ride on this scooter that somehow fit three of us and get a ride back home that night at 11:30. I wasn’t drunk, though, so I guess my limit is more than one can of Budweiser.
Awesome day.
And really, more people than me play League of Legends, so don't think of this silly uninteresting canine! XP
And also, I was thinking of that thing I said about how I would try to start LoL in China if there wasn't anything else I could do. The computer here is too crap for it, but it made me think of that. :P
IdidnotgetdrunkIswear.