Da dum tsh! pardon the silly Subject name, just having a title block amongst other things.

I looked through all my writing or the little i've got really, given i've just not had the frame of mind for it and seem to have lost notes I made and generally used for future reference incase I had some sorta gem in amongst the lines and lines of chaos.

I will eventually try to get back into it, because i did leave a story unfinished and I hate doing that.

I wish I could say about how I actually am these days, since i'm actually hurting a lot inside, with one major personal issue affecting my family as well as me and numerous issues both between me and my mum and also medical issues, it's badly stacked up and it's taking it's toll.

Here's one thing I can share, which i've never shared with anyone I know in the furs, bar 1 whom i've known for way long enough. I do suffer from terrible anxiety and it's not all the time, there are times i'm overconfident in situations and will often land myself into either a long conversation or rarely into a long argument.

but other times, I just shut down and am seriously minimal in response and I know i've done it with soo many people in my life from family to going through school and with teachers, from college with some tutors to doctors and recently with some furs.

I did always excused it on situations like being busy or not being well or diabetes or bullying in school, but i've had no real excuse the past two years, yet i've drifted away from soo many good friends just because I end up like this.

Anyway, didn't wanna turn this into a whiny Journal and actually promised myself I wouldn't, but i've written it now and I do feel better putting it somewhere.

anyways, ttfn