A friend of mine posted something like this and I thought it sounded like a good idea. I'm a very content person so my list isn't very long and I've ended up explaining myself a little after each one. For those who read I apologize in advance and thank you for your interest in my silly life!

-My Fursuit ^^

I haven't really told many people yet but I'm making payments toward a suit of furry Shadow and if I make all my payments as planned I'll have him before the end of the year. This is something I've wanted for a looooong time even though I've never been very vocal about it. Lots of people go around talking about how they are going to get a suit and it seems despite it being all they talk about it never happens. I don't want to be that guy, ya know? I've wanted my own suit since before I even knew what furry was. I was the Mascot at my High School and it is probably the coolest thing I've ever done. It is really one of the few things in this world that I actually think I'm good at. I could go on and on about this so I'll just stop there.

-To find true love

Doesn't everyone? It just seems a little more than that to me though. I was so focused on things other than myself that I was in my early 20s before I even realized I had never been in a relationship. I'm not desperate by any means, but I am eager. I feel like with each passing year it is just going to get harder and harder to find someone. Most people my age are spoken for and I'm around the age where younger people will start thinking I'm too old to date. I've always been told I'm such a nice caring and kind person. That a guy like me is special and I should have no problem finding someone so I shouldn't be down about it. And I tell you this, it isn't for a lack of trying.


-To always do the right thing

I think this is something everyone should want. For me it is more about finding balance between doing things for others and also for myself. So much of my life I've always been super selfless and sacrificed doing things for myself so that I could help others be happy. In the last few years I've been doing a pretty good job at finding time/money to do things for myself. I still feel a little guilty when there is an opportunity to help and I don't, but I know I can't help everyone.


-To be less boring

I don't really have any passionate hobbies unless you count being furry. Sure I keep up with sports to have something to chat with the fellow guys at work, and I like to play a video game now and then. But when someone says "How are you?" or "What have you been up to?" It seems all I ever have to respond with is "The Usual." or "Work." My life is pretty simple and I'm content with that. I'd much rather be chill and drama free.

-To feel like I have purpose in life/make a difference

This pretty much goes with my life being boring, but just a bit beyond that on an emotional level. From the time I was a kid people would always ask "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Some kids would say they want to be things like a fire man, an astronaut, or a doctor. Not me, I was the kid who knew he didn't know. I also knew that other kids had unrealistic expectations. Being a fireman means low pay for a high stress and dangerous job. You have better odds at being a professional athlete than you do at becoming an astronaut. And that other kid has no idea how much time and money it is going to take just to get the degree. I still don't know what I want to be "when I grow up" and I don't know if I ever will.

-A less dramatic sister

I love her to death but that chick just needs to chill out sometimes. Everything is not a big deal, and everyone is not out to get you. The thing that worries me about this is that I know this behavior runs in the family. I often over think things and think that the world is somehow plotting against me. When she flips out it reminds me of how I'm capable of looking if I didn't have better self control. But it also makes me worry that I could just be bottling it all up. I take pride in being strong emotionally and very rarely ask for help, but I do know it just isn't healthy not to have someone you trust to complain to and even simply let you know when your stressing over something silly.

-More friends to hang out with

I go to meets and stuff but a lot of the times I get the feeling people already have the friends that they are going to have. It has been like this at pretty much every stage of my life. I still remember moving to a new High School and seeing all the different social groups and BFFs that have known each other since elementary school. Despite good social skills, friendliness and a little bit of confidence I still can't seem to feel like I fit in.

-To be appreciated at work

I complained about this in journals before. But more specifically relates to the feeling like I have no purpose and am not going anywhere. I'm good at what I do, so much so that it is actually pretty boring. I have no issue with being paid for being bored, but I'm not going anywhere within the company. In recent history I've actually been kind of 'demoted' despite doing pretty much the exact same thing. Instead of technically being a QA I'm now a QI, the only difference being I can't sign specific paperwork and that I already make max for a QI so they can only give me an annual 2% cost of living raise. Bull shit.

-To relax more often

I think too much. It is just the way my brain is wired. I look around, process things. It makes me very attentive, a quick learner and a relatively 'deep' person. It also means even when I'm laying in a hot bath trying to get some well earned R and R my brain just won't stop and enjoy the moment. It really makes it hard for me to just de-stress and gives me issues when I try to go to bed. I've been like this forever and I know how to deal with it, I just simply would like to be able to just simply chill out more often.