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Motivation
13 years ago
Been a while since I've posted any stories, and I'm not convinced that will change anytime soon.
The past few months haven't really been great for me as a writer. I had a free summer with plenty of time to take advantage of and actually write something (something I'll never have again); I ended up just making a bunch of small doodles that were all ultimately disappointing. I did produce a few things that I liked, but they were kind of silly and I was basically the only one who liked them. It's probably been five or six months since I've been decently proud of something I wrote, and that was for a school assignment, so I had external motivation to put in effort for that.
Now that I've got classes to deal with again and astrophysics research to dive into, I doubt that I'll be spending any more time on writing than I was in the summer.
I'm still... kind of writing, I suppose. A few days ago I started writing a small story, and it was fun, but I don't have much motivation to write the two or so paragraphs that are left and give it an editing pass so I can post it. I would just rather play video games or learn a new equation or learn more piano skills.
I have friends who encourage me and offer feedback and discuss writing with me, and they've been really helpful over the summer, but I really think this is an internal problem that only I can fix. I'm hoping that the act of posting this journal will somehow motivate me, because writing used to be something that was really fulfilling for me. It just lately hasn't been, for whatever reason. Which is perfectly okay, but a little disappointing.
tl;dr: I'm lazy.
The past few months haven't really been great for me as a writer. I had a free summer with plenty of time to take advantage of and actually write something (something I'll never have again); I ended up just making a bunch of small doodles that were all ultimately disappointing. I did produce a few things that I liked, but they were kind of silly and I was basically the only one who liked them. It's probably been five or six months since I've been decently proud of something I wrote, and that was for a school assignment, so I had external motivation to put in effort for that.
Now that I've got classes to deal with again and astrophysics research to dive into, I doubt that I'll be spending any more time on writing than I was in the summer.
I'm still... kind of writing, I suppose. A few days ago I started writing a small story, and it was fun, but I don't have much motivation to write the two or so paragraphs that are left and give it an editing pass so I can post it. I would just rather play video games or learn a new equation or learn more piano skills.
I have friends who encourage me and offer feedback and discuss writing with me, and they've been really helpful over the summer, but I really think this is an internal problem that only I can fix. I'm hoping that the act of posting this journal will somehow motivate me, because writing used to be something that was really fulfilling for me. It just lately hasn't been, for whatever reason. Which is perfectly okay, but a little disappointing.
tl;dr: I'm lazy.
In fact, I have too many things that I enjoy, I think. I play several instruments (mostly badly), compose music, write, develop video game mods, play video games, etc, so it really comes down to balancing those things.
You're right in the sense that I don't enjoy perfecting a finished product as much I used to. I think that has something to do with... just the stuff that I write, which is mainly stuff like furry stories and fanfiction and the occasional medieval fantasy story. I used to be really satisfied with writing those kinds of things, but not so much anymore. I want to write a novel or something, but I have no ideas and my attention span is so fickle that I'd probably write half of it and then never look at it again.