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Punctuation Nazi - The Comma
13 years ago
General
yes, i know when it comes to online communications punctuation and grammar are the first things to go out the window. i understand it really! every day in the real world, i have to look over my wording, spelling, punctuation, and everything to make sure i am as clear as possible (technical papers, oy...). when i'm online, my spelling and language are as lazy as any other furs, but there is something that has been bothering me more and more on the internet and in technical papers: the use of commas in lists.
the big problem i have with it is the placement of the final comma. sure, the sentence can be structured correctly, everything in the list is parallel constructed, but the last comma isn't where it should be. for instance:
i went to the store to pick up walnuts, ice cream and chocolate sauce.
there should be a comma after 'ice cream'. why? well here's another sentence built the same but more complex:
i need you to purchase three tubs of ice cream: cherry, blueberry and pralines and cream.
because a single list item contains a 'conjunction' it confuses the brain in which item is a whole item. is the final item a three compound item or is it two separate ones? maybe three? so to fix the problem we write:
i need you to purchase three tubs of ice cream: cherry, blueberry, and pralines and cream.
however, if we are to fix this sentence we need all comma lists to be parallel constructed. so the first sentence would be
i went to the store to pick up walnuts, ice cream, and chocolate sauce.
there, i've made my logical stand for the final comma. :3
alright, i ranted about it, now i expect to see less proper use of commas for a while x.x;
the big problem i have with it is the placement of the final comma. sure, the sentence can be structured correctly, everything in the list is parallel constructed, but the last comma isn't where it should be. for instance:
i went to the store to pick up walnuts, ice cream and chocolate sauce.
there should be a comma after 'ice cream'. why? well here's another sentence built the same but more complex:
i need you to purchase three tubs of ice cream: cherry, blueberry and pralines and cream.
because a single list item contains a 'conjunction' it confuses the brain in which item is a whole item. is the final item a three compound item or is it two separate ones? maybe three? so to fix the problem we write:
i need you to purchase three tubs of ice cream: cherry, blueberry, and pralines and cream.
however, if we are to fix this sentence we need all comma lists to be parallel constructed. so the first sentence would be
i went to the store to pick up walnuts, ice cream, and chocolate sauce.
there, i've made my logical stand for the final comma. :3
alright, i ranted about it, now i expect to see less proper use of commas for a while x.x;
I do find it funny, however, that you wrote a long rant about grammar here, and didn't use a single capital letter in your whole post.
All of that said, I always use the last comma anyway. I just remember being told it was optional and making a conscious choice to just use it all the time.
I am currently re-reading the "Earth's Children" series (as in Clan of the Cave Bear) and OMG that author loves her some commas. Its like she was opening a bag of commas and they exploded all over her books and she was like Eh, I'm just gonna leave those there.
SO MANY COMMAS. :[ I have to assume the author talks like Shatner, with pauses everywhere, for her to think you need so many goddamn commas.
And now for some additional misuses of the comma: http://chronicle.com/blogs/linguafr.....-wrong-part-i/
Using "I" to refer to yourself.
Improper use: i, i'm
Proper use: I, I'm
Capitalizing the first letter in a sentence.
Improper: hello there.
Proper: Hello there.
If people piss you off with their comma usage, then continuing to further bad grammar in the internet will just make more of those people.
It is understandable ONLY when using a number pad on a cellphone to throw grammar out the window (though I have a full keyboard phone so I do not have to type like a lazy idiot), but not when you have a full keyboard in front of you... Then it is just plain lazy, and makes many people discount any intelligence you may have.