Emotionally that is.
I saw friends Saturday and went to a house warming party... so it could have been a metric fuckton worse :)
Sundays are when I usually have a breakdown if im going to.
that entire day alone, especially with what's going on was just... yeah.

I just wanted to say thank you to my friends who posted words of encouragement, and my friends who railed at me online for being stupid... it's all really well appreciated.

I guess i've been avoiding the hard reality of my dysfunctional relationship.
I set myself up to fail. and now it's time for me to move on, and work on something more functional.

I'm not even sure that's possible but Im tired of being treated like a pile of... I dunno. I'm not a disposable a commodity as I think I am - use then toss aside.

I'll still do anything I can for my friends and people I care about... but I don't think I can handle being disposable anymore. I've sacrificed my soul too much for anther's sake.

.... lets see how long I can stick to that