It was partially mistakes on my part, partially other people's bad choices, and partially things done to me, but the result was an ugly, agonizing period in my life. For some time I was surrounded by reminders of my pain and failure, haunted by the ghost of the past and the hurt and anger and shame in the eyes of everyone who looked at me. I tried to run, moving several times and distancing myself as best I could from everything and everyone I knew. But my past hounded me, popping up in the most unexpected places, always there to slap me in the face no matter how far I fled.
Turns out I can't escape my past because it's a part of who I am; I carry it with me wherever I go. I can't hold on to my hurt because until I let go it will just keep on hurting. And I can't keep suppressing it because every time something reminds me of it, it becomes harder and harder to suppress.
It wasn't until I accepted that I had a part (however small) in the whole mess. It wasn't until I released my anger and resentment towards those involved and allowed myself to see things from their point of view. It wasn't until I stopped running and fully accepted what happened and that there was nothing I could do about it. It wasn't until I let the whole thing go that I found peace. Only then could I act rationally when confronted with something from my past (rather than instantly and mindlessly reacting with anger). Only then could I finally relax and know peace. And better yet, those around me felt my peace instead of my anger.