I'm sorry, but that's bullshit - you're not some faceless stranger who i'll end up forgetting about 'before long' and you NEVER will be.

You're a friend who is always striving to improve his artistic talents and unafraid of exploring new and drastic styles. You're a friend who's been so much fun to interact with, with a kind, dedicated personality who always insists on repaying others for their generosity. You're a friend who I was able to comfortably share likes and interests that I can only hope to show around my close family just yet, and while I never got a real chance to take it, always offered me the option of talking further with you on my concerns. You're a friend who always knew to lighten up the mood with your snappy wit, even if it was a mask to hide this interior conflict of yours towards now.

You're an awesome friend, and one I will NEVER EVER forget, so don't go saying to me that you're just some anonymous user from across the world. We both know that's not true, whether you want to acknowledge it or not.

Look, Nialus, i'm going to be blunt - by the sounds of things, you could really use some psychiatric help with this - I have no way of knowing if you've already taken action about this in your past, and I'm guessing by your current financial situation seeing someone now isn't exactly an option - but you need to talk about this with SOMEONE. Friends, loved ones, just... anyone, because withdrawing away from everything isn't going to work out for the best - maybe in the short run, maybe, but definately not in the long run. And it's not a strategy you can constantly fall back on when things go awry, because sooner or later you'll end up in a situatuion where you cannot just disappear, and when that day comes, you're going to have to learn to cope and face things head on.