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PLEASE ENLIGHTEN ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
13 years ago
I rarely share my personal life here, but I really need advice. from anyone, any background, any experience.
I've always admired the spirits exerted from samurais in the 14th century, where honor, discipline and loyalty goes above all else.
I've always tried to be like them, at least when it comes to dealing with girls.
I met this girl, charming and took great interest in me, who slept with me (only sleep) soon after we've met.
She said doesn't want to be in a relationship, and that she doesn't want to do anything with me.
There's another guy at the same time actively trying to get her.
She's a bit cheesy, although mostly innocent, she loves to almost flirt with us both.
Now before the drama goes on air, I found that she was sleeping with him too while sleeping with me.
I shut it down and told her that I don't tolerate these, and after a long talk and tears she promised to change.
She friendzoned him with talk, but apparently she still meets him every day and do everything together.
I know the other guy too, and feeling ashamed after I got baited into some action with her, and didn't talk to her in almost a month.
So apparently that helped, as I expected, for him and her to actually get together.
I found that my selfishness is getting me, and jealousy too, even if I know i shouldn't have any of these feelings, and that this is the best turnout already.
for those of you who don't care about too much drama, here's a simple version of question
Is it stupid in this age, in USA, for me to constantly control myself with discipline and honor that my culture taught me (and I'm serious about this), that I should just let myself go, and accept the fact that flirting and f-buddies are ok?
My human nature is fighting my conscious for sex and all those, but I've always forced myself to control my needs and as a result, gave up a lot of times where I could've had some relationships and physical actions.
Should I just follow the crowd that a commonly-known perverted sex-seeking american does??
Where has self control and seeking loyalty gotten me?
I mean, I really don't see myself getting any rewards from it anymore...not applause from society, not approval from whatever gods there are, just more time alone than more time with girls and fun.
I've always admired the spirits exerted from samurais in the 14th century, where honor, discipline and loyalty goes above all else.
I've always tried to be like them, at least when it comes to dealing with girls.
I met this girl, charming and took great interest in me, who slept with me (only sleep) soon after we've met.
She said doesn't want to be in a relationship, and that she doesn't want to do anything with me.
There's another guy at the same time actively trying to get her.
She's a bit cheesy, although mostly innocent, she loves to almost flirt with us both.
Now before the drama goes on air, I found that she was sleeping with him too while sleeping with me.
I shut it down and told her that I don't tolerate these, and after a long talk and tears she promised to change.
She friendzoned him with talk, but apparently she still meets him every day and do everything together.
I know the other guy too, and feeling ashamed after I got baited into some action with her, and didn't talk to her in almost a month.
So apparently that helped, as I expected, for him and her to actually get together.
I found that my selfishness is getting me, and jealousy too, even if I know i shouldn't have any of these feelings, and that this is the best turnout already.
for those of you who don't care about too much drama, here's a simple version of question
Is it stupid in this age, in USA, for me to constantly control myself with discipline and honor that my culture taught me (and I'm serious about this), that I should just let myself go, and accept the fact that flirting and f-buddies are ok?
My human nature is fighting my conscious for sex and all those, but I've always forced myself to control my needs and as a result, gave up a lot of times where I could've had some relationships and physical actions.
Should I just follow the crowd that a commonly-known perverted sex-seeking american does??
Where has self control and seeking loyalty gotten me?
I mean, I really don't see myself getting any rewards from it anymore...not applause from society, not approval from whatever gods there are, just more time alone than more time with girls and fun.
It is rare to find a really honest girl to be an ideal girlfriend and wife.
It's just I don't know if it's a good idea to keep holding on those ideal values that can be dropped and receives no blame from the society.