Whole world comes crashing down...
13 years ago
May seem over-dramatic, but it feels this way to me...
This evening at 9 pm, I got a call from my mother, which is odd as she only rings on Sundays... She says she has some bad news... I was already welling up when she said that, bracing myself when she mentioned: "Smudge"
Instantly, I collapsed to the floor, my legs giving way as I burst into tears repeatedly saying "no..." to my mother... Devistated...
I cried for at least an hour before finally returning back to the living room to join my housemates in front of the T.V. I couldn't focus, I could barely speak for I feared that anything would set me off again. That cat was the world to me, and to be suddenly taken from me was the cruelest of fates. This is the first time I've ever lost a pet, other than a fish, and I've never lost any close family members either, so I've never felt this kind of pain before in my life. Especially as we had him since I was 4 or 5 years old. I'm 20 in January. He was very old for a cat.
He went peacefully and didn't suffer at all when it came for his time to go. Apparently there was nothing that could've been done, it happened so suddenly. It turns out he'd developed diabetes and his kidneys had failed. My parents were with him when he went... but I couldn't be because of stupid university... That's what hurts the most. That I couldn't properly say good-bye to him. He was pretty much MY cat. He'd always sleep in my room with me, lay with me on the sofa while I watch T.V. or play video games. We were basically never apart. I loved him more than anything in the world. And now he's gone. I can't actually believe it...
My mother asked me what we should do with him now. I said he should be buried in the garden. It's only fitting because if he wasn't with me, he'd be there. That house is also the only home he's ever known, as we got him when he was just a couple of weeks old. We're going to try and do it next weekend when both myself and my brother can be there to say goodbye to the fluffiest member of our family. So in the meantime... I write this journal in tribute to one of the two best cats on the world. The other being my other cat, Jasper, whom is still alive and well thankfully.
Rest in piece, Smudge. I will love you forever and always, whether you're with me or not. You'll forever be in my heart.
This evening at 9 pm, I got a call from my mother, which is odd as she only rings on Sundays... She says she has some bad news... I was already welling up when she said that, bracing myself when she mentioned: "Smudge"
Instantly, I collapsed to the floor, my legs giving way as I burst into tears repeatedly saying "no..." to my mother... Devistated...
I cried for at least an hour before finally returning back to the living room to join my housemates in front of the T.V. I couldn't focus, I could barely speak for I feared that anything would set me off again. That cat was the world to me, and to be suddenly taken from me was the cruelest of fates. This is the first time I've ever lost a pet, other than a fish, and I've never lost any close family members either, so I've never felt this kind of pain before in my life. Especially as we had him since I was 4 or 5 years old. I'm 20 in January. He was very old for a cat.
He went peacefully and didn't suffer at all when it came for his time to go. Apparently there was nothing that could've been done, it happened so suddenly. It turns out he'd developed diabetes and his kidneys had failed. My parents were with him when he went... but I couldn't be because of stupid university... That's what hurts the most. That I couldn't properly say good-bye to him. He was pretty much MY cat. He'd always sleep in my room with me, lay with me on the sofa while I watch T.V. or play video games. We were basically never apart. I loved him more than anything in the world. And now he's gone. I can't actually believe it...
My mother asked me what we should do with him now. I said he should be buried in the garden. It's only fitting because if he wasn't with me, he'd be there. That house is also the only home he's ever known, as we got him when he was just a couple of weeks old. We're going to try and do it next weekend when both myself and my brother can be there to say goodbye to the fluffiest member of our family. So in the meantime... I write this journal in tribute to one of the two best cats on the world. The other being my other cat, Jasper, whom is still alive and well thankfully.
Rest in piece, Smudge. I will love you forever and always, whether you're with me or not. You'll forever be in my heart.
I was truly horrified and spent the night crying on and off until I finally got some sleep, which wasn't very much and just spent the whole of today in my pyjamas, eating almost non-stop...