yesterday i was at the mall hanging out with some friends. had a great time. with one notable exception. i used to LOVE hydro thunder. great game. the successor, H2Overdrive is at this arcade. however, i noticed one of the machines was out of order. from a distance it looked like someone had hit the screen, and perhaps cracked it through the protective plastic. - hard to tell since it shut down. i approached it and mentioned it to one of my friends, though of course i also got the attention of a teenager- probably between 17 and 19, sitting in the seat who was chatting with someone in the seat next to it. i commented on the fact that it sucked that it looked like someone had messed up the machine. the teenager turned to look at me, looked at the screen, then slowly back at me, with the most blatant tone of immense and false sincerity he goes "oh, SHIT." as if it was the most important thing to happen in world history.

in an instant i was back in school, dealing with the exact same treatment from an entire generation of peers with zero respect for anyone or anything around them. a flood of anger and hatred hit me like a ton of bricks. a moment of immense disrespect coupled with two decades of frustration and regret and hate. then i snapped out of it. i've got a decade on this kid, but he wasn't too young to take a boot up the ass for being a prick. i wanted to get right in his face and call him out on his false sincerity. i wanted to teach this little miserable little shit a lesson in respect. shit for all i know he was probably the kid who fucked up the machine. the entire time he was at the arcade i never saw him play a game. only using machines as furniture.

being who i am, reason kicked in immediately and made a few facts clear before i even replied. if i did this i would be banned from the arcade, maybe even the mall i was about to possibly land a job at. if he wasn't 18 yet i could be arrested for assaulting a minor, and it would have ruined the gathering of several friends, which, thankfully ended up being a great time. so i withdrew... like i always did all my life, adding this moment of hatred to a pile of bad memories i want to put behind me every day of my life, but are instantly pulled up to the surface by a new, similar occurrence.

i should have said something though. i regret not at least telling him to have a little goddamn respect. unlike many prior times in my life, if i had said something, he probably would have backed off because i could have beaten the everliving shit out of him if he tried anything.

so.. does this make me the bitter new generation, directly hating the younger crowd for being different, or am i just bitter because the generation really isn't any different at all, which is thoroughly disappointing?

i don't normally post about these things. but, whatever. i probably wont make a habit of it.