Hey guys... If I don't post another journal or piece of artwork here it's probably because I did something stupid. Personally, I can't say there is a good reason for what I might end up doing today but I know that it is what I want. I've thought about it day in and day out. The only thing worth living for right now is well.... friends. I've never truly known any of the feelings I want to and feel like I never will. The only reason I've made it this far is my fears. I'm not afraid of death or the pain that comes with it. I am afraid of hurting the people I care about. I know there isn't a good reason for committing suicide. Life is what it is. It's like a card game, some people just get dealt shitty hands. Well - I was given a second chance and I screwed up. I am back to the hand I originally drew. In life and possibly my passing I want nothing more than for people to appreciate what they have and the things I enjoy(ed). For those of you that care about me. Let me live on by doing things I liked. Enjoying some of my past-times, looking through my art work, and so on and so forth. I've made it this far... Why not go further? A question I am often posed with - expected to answer. I don't really see anything wrong with my life at the moment. I don't look forward to the future because there isn't anything for me to predict. I am lost and always will be. You can shine the light and lead the way but I won't know the difference. Don't let me lie to you. I am happy. Do not cry for me because that isn't what I want. Just smile for me, smile like I do. - Right now at this very moment I am losing my sanity. My words are making less sense as I go on. So if I do not return I bid you all a fair well and a good rest of your day. Goodbye for now. I AM INSANE. I AM ALONE. I AM LOVED. I LOVE. I CARE. I AM CARED FOR. I AM FRAGILE. I AM WEAK. I AM ME.