god this sucks, as if I'm not already a stinking drunk cause I suck (and suck cause I drink) I found myself this afternoon with the realization that I somehow got myself addicted to coffee. this time last year I swore up and down that I hated the stuff now I drink it till I about OD and start shaking like twitchy little chiwawa. AND DAMNIT IT'S NOT FUNNY! I admit watching other artists and people get twitchy after their 12th cup of coffee and run from Poughkeepsie to Manhattan and back; but it's not funny when I can't and lay around feeling hung over on coffee. why can't I become chemically addicted to something like... oh... say drawing? nooo, it has to be alcohol, caffine, ritilin, whatever that stuff is that gives you that warm fuzzy feeling after your first FA of the day.

but I digress... The Fall is a horrible book, how the hell did that guy win a nobel prize?