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to my friends: how i show that i love you
12 years ago
if i rub my butt on you
throw up on you
pee all over your page
punch you in your internet tit
scream in your ears
spit in your eyes
headbutt you in the colon
call you a fagmunch
shit in your coffeepot
if i'm generally rude to you
or anything similar to that
i love you.
YOU BUTT-RUBBER
I CHEATED ON YOU WITH EVERYONE ELSE
with my butt
headbutts your colon SO HARDtake you out for a nice (reasonably priced) lunch at a midrange food establishment
and when the waiter comes to take our order, if you get a drink and it comes with a slice of lemon, I will FUCKING TAKE THAT SLICE OF LEMON AWAY FROM YOU.
GAAAAASSSSPPPPROOD
SO ROOD
ULTRA ROOD
how could you
Ily
Fuckin Applebees or some shit
Waiter come up and bitch be all like "oh you guys make such a cute couple" and I would be all like "no, she is my sister and can I please have another diet coke"
lol'd too hard at thatand then i'd say "BUT I'm PREGNANT!"
waiter be trippin' then
I'm in lesbians with you, brother