It's all a case of self-discipline. It's a struggle some days, I know. There are days where I hafta throw myself out of bed to get up and do anything, and there are days where I don't have the strength to do it. You're right though...there is nothing anyone can do except be as supportive as they can. It's a matter of your raw determination to not let yourself give in to the negative thoughts. Medicines and high dollar psychiatrists can only alleviate some of the symptoms, not the root cause.

I noticed in either your last journal, or the journal before it (My memory is terrible) that you said you were looking for work, but one of the avenues would be taking a position that an immigrant worker could fill. That's no reason to keep from applying for it. The job market is a competitive and cutthroat world. In order to get out of your slump, you're gonna hafta start worrying about #1 before you worry about other people you've never met or spoken to. Once you're on your feet and doing well, THEN you can worry about the rest of the people that need to get on their feet as well. Otherwise, you're gonna get trampled. Sure, you may want a white-collar job, but from the looks of it you might need to settle for some blue-collar until you can establish yourself.

The need to roam and escape from things is your subconscious' way of telling you that you're spreading yourself too thin, when you need to hunker down and fight it out to get the freedom you desire. When the feeling in the back of your mind tells you that "today's gonna be hell", just ignore it, and tell yourself that even if things go sour, you'll make it through just fine.

Well said.

I'd try making it better but it would involve me actually being with you physically to do so. T_T