It's a matter of time now before I reach 5000 page views, the artwork celebrating it is already done, I finished it early since I'd thought I would not be on FA long enough to see it. It's been a road, maybe long and hard, but still a road and now and then, one finds them self broken down on it, flat tire, engine trouble, or just those darn hitch hikers. Ok, enough of the metaphors time to be straight and direct. I've looked at maybe the past 5 pieces of art and one thing keeps coming up, it's porn!!! Now don't get me wrong, I like doing porn like the next person but what was a pleasure for me is slowly becoming a chore. Perhaps it's my old age catching up with me, I can't continue to try and relive my lost and shattered childhood through my art, time for me to face up to reality, such as it is.

Still, I can't help myself sometimes, or perhaps I'm looking way too deep into this. I still have a few things I want to finish, like my stories, and doing a least some art for them. I want to do some work on my sorry excuse for animation skills to at least produce something worth posting. I want to get over that dread fear I have of asking for Oc sessions and drawing other people's characters, I guess that is the biggie cause I can't really see why I have to keep myself insulated from the rest of the community. Having a girlfriend in RL is nice, but to do that, I had to give up my friends online, or what friends I had left. It would be nice to be able to be on more friendly ground with folks but I guess that is too much to ask, if I was 20 years younger I guess.

I still have not changed the mood on my page, it is hard to tell how feel these days and sometimes I wish there was a way to keep it blank. Anywho, enough ranting for now, I gotta decide if I should plot some art evil, or kill myself trying to produce something clean for a change. Cheers.