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So here's what's going down.
12 years ago
Mom wants to destroy everything I own. My computer, my comics, my identity as Wolf Nanaki on the Internet.
She is standing right here, watching me type this.
I want her to read this.
I love you. I have always loved you, from the day I was born, and will until the day I die.
I want us both to have long, happy lives.
But this doesn't help us.
This isn't the way shit should be happening.
Yes, I messed up. A lot.
But you're scaring me.
You're hurting me.
I want to run away but I have nowhere to run.
I wish you would let me have my stuff and try to fix myself, as a grown man.
But you won't let me.
You want me to kill Wolf Nanaki and spend the rest of my life as Rosalie's money maker.
I know losing money is bad. Really.
But I want to grow and do my own thing.
I want to be successful.
I want to change myself for the better, and make you and my brothers proud.
I want to be Wolf Nanaki.
That's a part of me, and always will be.
So please.
She is standing right here, watching me type this.
I want her to read this.
I love you. I have always loved you, from the day I was born, and will until the day I die.
I want us both to have long, happy lives.
But this doesn't help us.
This isn't the way shit should be happening.
Yes, I messed up. A lot.
But you're scaring me.
You're hurting me.
I want to run away but I have nowhere to run.
I wish you would let me have my stuff and try to fix myself, as a grown man.
But you won't let me.
You want me to kill Wolf Nanaki and spend the rest of my life as Rosalie's money maker.
I know losing money is bad. Really.
But I want to grow and do my own thing.
I want to be successful.
I want to change myself for the better, and make you and my brothers proud.
I want to be Wolf Nanaki.
That's a part of me, and always will be.
So please.
Your a great person and a Danm good friend
Your successful and you have the right to be yourself
Your 'mother' has no right to how you are
Infact! I'd question if that is your mother cause a real mother would accept their own child.
I hope your 'mother' realizes this. Cause you are you
<3 have a great day nana, please stay happy and positive, dear! <3
My advice to you is to steel yourself and harden your resolve. I know from experience that standing up to someone that raised you is one of the hardest things you're likely to have to do. When I took control of my life, my grandmother fought it hard. I tried, I failed and ended up back under her roof. She started treating me like an adult after that, especially after I straightened things out on my own and started actually acting like one.
You already have a head start on that. I know this hurts, but keep on the course you're choosing. It seems like you're on the right track. Even if she seems to have gone mad, your mother likely loves you, and thinks she's doing what's best. It's just that she's wrong. She's hurting you, and not letting you be who you are, or letting you try and straighten your life out. Remember that she doesn't see that, and odds are you won't make her see with words.
Act. Keep to your plans. Straighten things out on your own, regardless her actions. Work on the goals you set. Eventually, she'll get it when you leave and don't fail like I'd venture to say she expects. Prove to her you're an adult.
Sorry, didn't mean to start a rambling speech. I hope things start returning to the realm of sanity in your life.
Please do what you need to!
No matter what, nobody can destroy the identity of who you are.
Or is she upset because she finds that her child has not grown up perfectly like she wanted?
THOSE THINGS are priorities in life dude, not your 'wolf nanaki' person which I'm sorry bro, is just a ripoff of ff7's red13/nanaki character.
pretending to be a wolf online is great and all but if you're an ADULT and living at home, there are things expected of you. its ungrateful as all hell to say you dont have to help your mother and that you have every right to blow money when you're losing your home or your livelihood is in jeopardy. Life comes first. furry porn, art and pleasure should only happen when you can legitimately afford it. Everyone giving you asspats and saying youre a hero here are only getting one side of the story.
And if this -is- true and your mother really is struggling with bills and you are knowingly blowing money on things like porn instead of helping your blood, then you are a sad human being.
I have my poor mother spending thousands and thousands up to around 30k in hospital bills from just this year alone and while being jobless in order to properly recover I don't spend a goddamn dime on myself and do my best to help her in anyway possible until I can pay her back.
All in all you must really get your priorities straightened out.
You mention you are a grown man. Then act like it. I know the economy isn't at its best, but you could try to find a temp job through an agency.
You have no legal ties to your parents and being a 'grown' man means you have the ability to just walk out the door.
There are many shelters available to anyone's convenience to help assist those who need a roof over their head.
There are also in-town suites which cost around 150-250 USD a week. It has a kitchen and everything.
with the money you have saved which I recall you said around 2k, you have plenty to live off of comfortably for a good month or two.
I am not trying to be rude so please do not get defensive. But you need to be pointed into the right direction before the fandom ends up hating you.
and even I had to move back in with my mother and I help out the family with tons. not just aroudn the house but with food bills and the like. its upsetting to hear people DONT support their families and try to mooch off their parents and feel entitled.
Oh don't get me started. I feel like that when it comes to nursing homes XD but that is a totally different subject
I know I've made a lot of mistakes, and I'm doing my best to make myself better, not just for my sake, but also mom's. I do appreciate your comment.
Edward Jones is a place that offers assistance and booking.
Online Budget Advisor
Mint
There are a lot. Just use google to your advantage.
I had some assistance when I was in highschool through an accounting professors. It really helped me in the long run and as of now, all I ever seem to do is organize my friends budget because I like counting and am OCD as well as incredibly frugal.
Trust me there are a lot of places right under your nose willing to help.
Whether this is false, or if you are sincere about your mother doing this "Fall down seven time stand up eight."
But really though, thank you for the suggestions on the consulting.
I know you don't know me or anything but I am always willing to lend a hand when someone needs it.
Trust me I have been to hell and back and there again. But there are many programs out there to assist those who have ran into bad situations.
I would list some more places but I must prepare for my next final today @__@
And I guess all I knew about you before was that you're an awesome artist. I guess now I know you're a cool person too. c: