well its about time i should make a update. its not looking good.

i haven't had luck with the car company I'm trying to get a job with, the only chance i have right now is if the company fuck up, fucks up and gets fired like the guy who wants me to work there would like to happen.

other job prospects? well there are none, i have been pretty depressed and just haven't looked.

speaking of being depressed, i am i don't show it but its there. that's why i have gained quite a few pounds and that doesn't make me feel good about my self. also i have in the past few months (and in my live in general mainly the last few months) i have had some wild mood swings. mainly at work due to aggravation i cause my self over customers. i get quite angry and take my anger out on some boxes or out cooler door at work.

i blame these things on my job. i now see that its probably not all my jobs fault. its probably a chemical imbalance in me. both my mom and sister have a thyroid problems (even though it effects women more then men there still is a chance that i might have a problem there). but it could be a great deal of other things. i don't tend to hypochondriac my self into things but i do need to get a regular doctor and get test run it will be the best thing i can do now.